January 30, 2006

February sweeps are upon us, fellow AMC fans. And this week laid the foundation for the fireworks that are headed our way in the coming month.

I remember how I used to look forward to the Crystal Ball every year in remembrance of Maria. It was such as treat to see the actors all dressed up and the Mardi Gras Ball provides all the essentials this year!!

The big blast set up this week's "igloos" - isolated pockets where certain characters were trapped and forced to wait together to be rescued. And in true soap opera fashion, the pairings weren't exactly random. Funny how that works out, eh?

In the aftermath of the explosion, which by the way was totally awesome, we do indeed have the death of Ethan.

As a die-hard Zach/Kendall fan, you would think I'd be pretty depressed after this week's turn of events. After all, we started with Kendall asking Ryan to move in with her, and we ended with the former lovers sharing a kiss. I guess I should be angry, or worried, or sad.

I have to wonder about Babe. Here she appears to understand that Janet is insane, has the advantage over her, yet takes the keys and turns her back allowing Janet to whack her with the leg of lamb.

JR Chandler makes a sincere, heart-felt apology to Babe and his family members for letting his anger control the last year of his life. In my humble opinion, this would have to be the best scene of the week, as Jacob Young never ceases to amaze me with his depth.

There David was seeing, touching and loving Dixie. What does he get in return? Basically a "Back off, Big Fella"! I found Dixie somewhat hypocritical considering she left her son and family to believe she was dead for years but David is to be vilified for staging the Di is Dixie scenario.

A great week for Zach and Kendall, in my humble opinion. It started with a freaked-out Kendall going to her ex for advice, resulting in some wonderful scenes. If you had any doubt that the Zendall chemistry had faded (I know I didn't), it would be hard to argue that the magic is gone after watching the couple's conversation on Tuesday. When is the last time we saw Zach that happy? I certainly haven't seen him smile like that since before the Mardi Gras Ball.

That would be Dr. MADden. This man is slime or vile per Erica's description, yet he is able to convince Kendall to sign adoption papers, as well as twist Julia into believing she doesn't deserve to be a mother because she killed Garret a.k.a 'The Dragon'. I don't get it. When exactly did Julia and Kendall become brain dead?

The moment that impatient AMC fans everywhere were waiting for finally happened. Dixie Cooney Martin, who was keeping herself busy lurking behind every available shrub in Pine Valley, came face to face with Tad on Friday. If you didn't know it was coming, the suddenness of the reveal must have been a little jarring. I love how AMC staged this moment. There was no dramatic music, no overly suspenseful set up - David and Dixie were just talking, they turned around and Tad was standing there. Bravo to Cady McClain and Michael E. Knight for putting on their best 'stunned' faces. I can't wait to hear what these two have to say to each other.

I was never a huge Tad and Dixie fan, but I have to say their scenes together this week brought tears to my eyes. Oh, they were just so heartfelt.

t's that time again. The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, people are coming back from the dead, and pregnant women are being kidnapped from creepy island spas. The wonders of May Sweeps.

Kendall and Zach finally admitted they love each other and get married at sea.

Well, it hasn't exactly been an action-packed start to sweeps. Yes, Kendall was crushed by debris and lapsed into a coma, Zach and Dixie were locked in a vault and Lily and Jonathan were running around Manhattan encountering various stereotypes, but it's not exactly the crazy, minute-to-minute pace the other ABC soaps have established so far this May.

Babe's choice to turn JR in for his murder attempt was a tough one as I believe Babe truly loves JR. On one hand Babe knows that JR could go to prison for a very long time which means their son will be 'Daddy-less'.

Another week, another box of tissues. If I were a smarter woman, I would have invested in Kleenex before sweeps even started. With all of this Kendall-or-Spike drama, I'm surprised I haven't passed out from dehydration. Zach's desperation and comatose Kendall's pleas had me choked up all week. Cheesy? Yep. But what can I say? I'm a sucker for Zach-and-Kendall sappiness.

There we had Jamie, Aidan and Josh all shirtless. What's a girl to do? Enjoy the eye candy is what I say!

We'll begin this week by discussing the ongoing Dr. Madden saga, since AMC has been bashing us over the head with this whodunit all week long.

Jeff Martin is back and not happy with Erica. Anyone surprised? After all if memory serves, Erica tried to pass the abortion off as a miscarriage as it was done without Jeff's knowledge or permission since having a baby would have ruined Erica's modeling career. Instead the abortion ruined Erica's first marriage. I was waiting for Jeff to blurt out to Josh --- "You're my SON!!!"

Josh Madden wants to know if his 'father,' Dr. Greg Madden, is truly as twisted as everyone thinks.

We can see it coming ---- an earthquake in Pennsylvania and Greg will be crushed & killed.

Thank the Soap Opera Gods. Greg Madden is dead!!! It is over, finished, way overdue. Pretty anti-climatic considering how involved this mystery was, but nevertheless, we can finally rest from watching such gory, sadistic moments. Now of course we have to determine who did 'the deed.' Who is behind it all? One, two, a dozen people?

Kendall decides she needs to check Spike's DNA to find out if Greg is the father as opposed to Ryan. Up steps Josh to be the 'Greg' donor and what results do we get???

Wake me when it's over

A girl goes away for a few weeks and what does she come back to? People kissing the wrong lips, long-awaited reveals with no dramatic punch, annoying newbies, and characters damaged almost beyond repair. It almost makes me wish I was still on vacation.

Exposed!

Josh finds out he's a walking fetus, that he was supposed to be aborted and that Jeff Martin is his biological father all in one swoop. I don't feel any sympathy towards Josh and don't get Babe running to him.

Like the title? Here's the trick - am I referring to Babe and Josh's unfortunate emergency landing or to AMC in general, which seems to be getting worse with each passing week?

Didn't we all know that JR would find Babe in Josh's arms even though we know she fell asleep before he held her?

Jonathan agreed to tell Lily that he was cured. As happy as I am to see their relationship end, I did appreciate Jeff Branson and Leven Rambin's performances in these scenes.

There is just way too much deception in the works between Dixie and Zach. Lying to the authorities to provide each other an alibi??

On paper, the Madden Murder Mystery has all the elements of a decent story, specifically a hated victim and a long list of suspects. So why is it that I still don't care who actually did the deed? It might have something to do with the way this shaky plot continued to evolve this week.

We all know Greg was buried, tortured and subsequently died from an 'earthquake' but until this week we were unaware that Tad actually saw Greg being buried.

That said, I want to start out by talking about Monday's episode of AMC. The show was written specifically for airing on the fifth anniversary of the 9-11 terrorist attacks, and was designed to focus on core relationships in PV. There were even some subtle 9-11 references. This episode made me cry (admittedly, not too difficult a task), not only because the content moved me, but because it reminded me what AMC could be, given the right circumstances.

There appears to be some lying going on in PV. Tad saw Zach and Dixie pack Madden up in the trunk of their car and bury him, but Zach says that isn't so. Either Zach or Tad or lying. The question is which one and why? Of course, one could just figure that Tad is mistaken and he saw someone else.

The so-called triangle between Kendall, Ryan and Zach forged ahead this week, much to my chagrin

After a very anti-climatic trial for Dixie Cooney and Zach Slater, we find out who the real murderer was. I am sure most of you were as surprised as I was that they would have a long and upstanding character be the culprit. Much like Bianca. I can remember thinking months ago when Tad stood out by the gravesite devoid of emotion how he must be involved or know something.

Does it bother anyone else when backburnered characters suddenly get a story when they're on their way out the door? I am, of course, referring to David Hayward, who may have been on screen more this week than he has been in the past six months. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to see him, but it means a little less knowing that Vincent Irizarry will be gone soon. I'm still really nervous about how that exit will happen, especially with David all wrapped up in another Tad/Dixie-centered storyline. It's going to be way too easy to make him the fall guy.

One could say AMC needs to be concerned considering the ratings during the Madden reveal tied their all time low which places the show just above the perennial basement dwelling Passions for total viewers.

Once again, fortune smiles on the readers of SOC's AMC Two Scoops. You were all spared the over-the-top gush-fest that I would have written last week after the reunion of Zach and Kendall. Just like the week of their remarriage in May, the schedule didn't cooperate with my fanaticism. So those of you who aren't fans of my favorite couple can consider yourselves lucky to have dodged that bullet. Those of you who love Zach and Kendall as much as I do… well, you know how I feel anyway.

What a concept, what a feat, what a great story for Del Henry to write about. He’s referring to Zach Slater though, not Tad Martin. When Del shows up at the Slater’s home to broach the subject, Kendall sets him straight. Zach was acquitted, end of story.

JR is a very tortured soul and spinning out of control after hearing the confirmation that his wife did sleep with Josh Madden.

Oh my, so many PV residents claiming they "love" someone but that's not the way I see it from here. Babe insists she loves JR. However she had no problem sleeping with Josh and let's not forget the night she came to PV and promptly hopped into bed with Jamie even though she was a newlywed.

Most of the week seemed to revolve around the Martin-Chandler clan, who was still keeping watch over an injured JR.

David's long gone and leaves via tape to boot. David did get to tell Babe goodbye and profess his love for her even though Babe is undeserving of that love. David also went to Leora's gravesite which was such a moving scene and again proves that Vincent should have never been let go from AMC.

So I took the final tally after yesterday's episode - I think I went through about three boxes of Kleenex this week. The good news is I wasn't crying about how awful AMC was, which I've been tempted to do many times this year. The bad news is those tears fell because Pine Valley lost one of its most universally loved characters, Simone Torres

I really wish AMC had not taken the path of a murder spree right after the Madden fiasco. It's hard to understand why they have decided to rid themselves of cast members in this way especially considering they are searching for a new female cast member to be brought onboard. It's enough to make one's head spin.

It's that time of year again, fellow AMC fans! Time to look back on the year that was to see what worked (Zach & Kendall) and what didn't (pretty much everything else). Seeing as this column will cover all of 2006, I want to warn you that you're in for a longer read than normal, with more criticism than praise for our beloved show. It's been a rough year for us, and it's time to hash everything out and hope for better things in 2007. So here are my choices for the best and worst of All My Children.

Making headlines on soapcentral.com: