As if this is news to anyone, but Emily has rounded the bend from a little unstable to full-on psychopath. Seriously, she gives new meaning to the term "desperate housewife." She took her insanity one step further this week, when she took a suicidal leap off a cliff. Don't worry, Scoopers. I'm sure she'll be fine. Well, as "fine" as Emily can get.

As if this is news to anyone, but Emily has rounded the bend from a little unstable to full-on psychopath. Seriously, she gives new meaning to the term "desperate housewife." She took her insanity one step further this week, when she took a suicidal leap off a cliff. Don't worry, Scoopers. I'm sure she'll be fine. Well, as "fine" as Emily can get.

I do have a little sympathy for the blond one. Hal treated her like she didn't exist, and Paul dumped her at her own wedding. But it's hard to sympathize too much, considering she was ready to ditch her own kid to go on the run with Paul and the fact that she kidnapped and tortured poor Dusty for weeks. Don't take this the wrong way, but I was glad to see Emily jump. Frankly, if I had to listen to her hysterical sobbing for one more minute, I would have thrown myself off a cliff. Somebody sedate her!!!!

Meanwhile:
--Mark you calendar for June 16, Scoopers. That's the day Simon (Paul Leyden) is scheduled to return to Oakdale and the day I'll be doing the dance of joy. I can't wait to see what's in store for my favorite Aussie. His character didn't fare well during his last return (hello Pilar!) but if I can forgive Barbara for doping Emily and sending half of Oakdale to the wacky spa, then I can cut Simon a little slack, too.

--Congratulations to Jennifer Landon on her Emmy win for Younger Actress. It was well deserved. Way to go, Jen!

--I know I've said it before, but Paul looks more and more like Jesus every day. Before you mock me, Paul did rise from the dead, you know. Several times, in fact. So there. On a side note, I usually don't like long hair on men, but Paul is gorgeous with that 'do. And yes, I feel a little weird saying that after my Jesus comment.

--Kudos to Tom Hughes this week for saying what we've all been thinking. When he told Meg that he didn't understand why she and Emily "follow (Paul) around blindly with no thought for the consequences," I was nodding my head in agreement. "I just don't get it," Tom told Meg. Neither do I, Tom. Neither do I. Maybe it's the Jesus resemblance. (Kidding, folks. Just kidding.)

--Dusty escaped from Emily's clutches this week to make it back home. Can I get an Amen? He and Jennifer happily reunited in their hotel room. I'd like to comment on the details of his escape, but I can't. I missed the entire thing due to a local news interruption. UGHHHH!!!!

--I don't like insecure Maddie, although it is realistic for teens and even adults to feel that way in relationships. But Maddie is gorgeous, smart and fun. Casey Hughes should be thrilled that she would even throw a crumb his way. It looks like this newfound closeness between Gwen and Casey is going to cause problems for sweet Maddie and devoted Will. This could be a rocky summer for the teens. We all know what happens when Barbara starts playing puppet master, and it seems she's already pulling strings to throw Gwen and Casey together.

--Will gets points this week for inviting and taking Carly to the Crash opening to see her sister, and his wife, sing. Now that's what I call a supportive husband. Hal Munson, take a note.

--Curls are hot, ladies. So put away your straightening irons. Katie, Jennifer and Gwen are all sporting beautiful, bouncy curls these days. Love it.

--Was anyone else chuckling at Dusty's comment that Em shooting Paul could have been "foreplay that got out of hand?" And if that wasn't enough, Jennifer's line that Emily was "on the edge" was too funny, considering that when Jen said it, Emily literally was on the edge of the cliff, mentally confronting her enemies.

--It's also official that Lucy is returning. Peyton List isn't coming back. The role has been recast. I'm guessing this means Jen and Dusty shouldn't pick out china just yet.

--Poor Henry. He got roughed up by Paul and Susan this week. Frankly, I think he could take Paul, considering his recent wounds and illnesses. Susan - I'm not so sure about.

--I don't blame Carly for being creeped-out in her own house. If I'd found a dead body in my basement wall, I'd be freaking out, too. Kudos to the writers for this brilliant plot twist that was a springboard to get Jack and Carly under the same roof again out at the farm.

--I've always enjoyed Meg, but frankly I'm finding it harder and harder to root for her. Her obsession with helping Paul has trumped everything in her life, and to quote Tom Hughes, "I just don't get it." I wanted to see a strong story for her. But she went from obsessing over Dusty to obsessing over Paul in a matter of a few weeks. I agree with Hal, Meg needs to seriously think about the choices she's made over the last few weeks. Let's hope she makes some better ones this summer.

--I'm still shocked that the show honchos gave Will a job as a janitor. Well done. I don't think I've ever seen a soap teen with such an unglamorous job. Kudos to whomever made that decision. It's realistic, and it shows that Will is a hard worker. And it makes sense, unlike previous years when teens took jobs tending bar.

--Gwen i.e. Jennifer Landon has a beautiful singing voice. I can't wait to hear more! I'm hoping the new club, Crash, will become destination number one for Oakdale's finest. I love it when the whole town gets together at one place to trade barbs and snide comments. Hmmm...is that why they named the place "Crash?"

--That purse found with the skeleton in the wall seems to be troubling Jack. Did he know the victim? Or does he recognize that purse as belonging to someone he knows?

--If you haven't heard the news, Nick is leaving Oakdale. I wish Jordan Wooley the best. His character never clicked with me, but I know he has plenty of fans. I don't know if it's storyline dictated or if the canvas just got too crowded with Simon and Damian both returning.

Best Line of the Week:
(Paul and Meg share a romantic moment, after the showdown with crazy Emily ended.")
Paul: "You are..."(caresses her face)
Meg: "the sanest girlfriend you've had this month?"

Reader Spotlight:
(From Two Scoops reader Linda)
"Hello Jennifer. Great two scoops as always. I would like to give a holler to Muryum (fellow Two Scoops reader featured in Jennifer's last column.) She said it all: Carly and Jack are awesome actors. When Jack walked out on Carly, WOW, the pain she felt brought back some serious emotions and pain I felt over 10 years ago. I can't wait to see what happens next, because the girl (Maura West) is good."

(From Two Scoops reader Janet)
"I'm a fairly new follower of ATWT (two years), thanks to my fiancé who has followed it for more years than he'll admit. I find the actors who play Carly and Jack are wonderful; however, Carly's "values" are so transparent and self-serving. I suspect if Jack doesn't find someone else pretty quick, he'll go back to her and put up with her numerous deceptions. Speaking of "dumb blonds," Henry is getting on my nerves! I can't stand to see a man so manipulated by a woman. I think he should tell Paul about the money. Paul has enough of his own so he wouldn't care less what Henry does with it. My favorite person is Meg. She's so down-to-earth; definitely someone you can count on. I believe it was not true to her character to switch the blood tests re: Jen's baby. She wouldn't have lowered her standards, particularly since she has compassion for others. Just my feelings!"

That's all for now. See ya next time, Scoopers!
Jennifer Biller