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 Two Scoops: September 11, 2006 columns
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Jack Wagner
Thankful for tennis
For the Week of September 11, 2006
Nick seems to be the latest victim in the writer's quest to make every character just as disgusting and reprehensible as possible.
I used to hate weeks like this when some random and seemingly unimportant sporting event took center stage during the daytime hours. I would race home from school and get set for the Friday cliffhanger only to have to watch college basketball or, as in this case, tennis. However, this week I think I almost welcomed US Open coverage instead of watching the new "All in the Family" sex-fest that B&B has become in the last week or so. I can hardly keep track of all the ways that B&B is hemorrhaging viewers these days. If they are not careful, I may be the next one.

It's obvious that no one is safe around here. Nick seems to be the latest victim in the writer's quest to make every character just as disgusting and reprehensible as possible. Now we have Nick bouncing back and forth AGAIN between Brooke and Bridget! UGH!!! I am SO SICK OF THIS!!!!!!!!!! My poor keyboard may not work too well after this column! Why the family pass-around anyway? How many times do we have to see a small transgression cause the injured party to go sleep with someone else without any hesitation or effort to get to the bottom of things. Gee, she kissed Ridge? Ok, now we better liquor up and sleep with her daughter, AGAIN! Why? Is this what the writers think we actually WANT to watch everyday? I don't. I'd rather have a root canal with no sedation than waste my time with the same ol, same ol! We saw this with Thorne and Macy. We saw this with Nick and Brooke before if memory serves. STOP ALREADY!

This gets my panties in a bunch for another reason, though. I can deal with hating Ridge. I can even deal with my newfound hatred of Bridget. But what I have a hard time stomaching is Nick morphing into such a pig. I hate to say that…I hate to even think it. I have loved his character since he sailed onto the screen following the tanker accident. I loved the beard, the peacoats and turtlenecks in 80 degree weather, and I loved his over the top sarcasm. He didn't care what he said or how you took it. No gray area. What do we have now that he has been put through the 'Magic Bullet' of soap writing? We have a weak-minded, insecure, and downright sleazy shell of his former self. So every time he and Brooke have some huge blow up or problem in general, he will go get some 'poor me' sex from Bridget of all people? No thanks, Brad. I'm not buying what you're selling. You have ruined Nick the same way you have ruined Ridge, Bridget, and Brooke.

And while I am on a roll, what is wrong with Bridget (besides Brad's crappy leadership)? It's like she has multiple personalities or something. She is in love with Nick, she's in love with Dante, she's in love with Nick again. Blah blah blah. What is so hard about making her a strong and resilient character who just goes about life like we all do? She is clearly obsessed with people her mother has slept with and if you ask me, Brad is making her into the next Brooke. Always wanting what she can't have and always using sex as her leverage. She is about as genuine as three dollar bill and I can't stand watching her these days. I don't know what's more fake…her love of her mother or her roots. Both need a little work in my opinion.

Trust me when I say, though, that Brooke is not getting a free pass for this 'I can't believe I let him kiss me' crap. Or better yet, the old standby of 'I was vulnerable'. WHAT? You have been 'vulnerable' for 19 years, lady!! Why can't you get a grip on your ego and turbocharged libido long enough to see how toxic he is for you? Someone get the net! She's lost her mind! Brooke can't keep thinking that she can keep playing tonsil hockey with Ridge and still get forgiveness and understanding from Nick. It doesn't work that way. If you can't keep your lips off another man, you shouldn't be married. Maybe she should not have tied the knot with Nick at all. I hate saying that but what else could it be? She is obviously not over Ridge or this wouldn't have happened. So what will she say when she finds out that Nick got some comfort booty from her daughter? Will he get the same pass that she expected? No way. It's all too disgusting for me anyway. It's making Nick look like a jerk (and even more so for hiding what he did) and it makes Brooke and Bridget look like oversexed crazy women with no self-respect. If this is all I want, I could watch "Desperate Housewives" in primetime and get the same effect, right? Oh yeah, that's right…they haven't slept with each other's kids or family members yet, right? They are looking like 'The Waltons' compared with B&B.

I want so badly to be behind this romance (or whatever you may call it) between Thorne and Taylor but it just seems a little icky to me. He JUST lost Darla and she is still dragging around that 200 pound anchor of guilt everywhere she goes. Every time she and Thorne embrace, she looks like she's about to melt down. At some point she will tell him the truth…no one could keep a lid on that kind of secret for too long. And he needs more time to grieve before he gets hot and heavy with the Doc. When the truth comes out (and mark my words, it will) things are going to get ugly.

So we kept Dr. Dimples around long enough to film another scene or two with Hector, huh? I still say he should have stayed to give us all a little dose of variety if nothing else. Hector is fast becoming that miserable and sad character that you almost HOPE gets the axe from the show. I am not saying this for any other reason than he has become another character that is virtually unrecognizable from their first appearance on the scene. Who is this guy? He's psycho, obsessed, and downright looney tunes over Taylor. He's broken the law in about 65 different ways and can't even 'act' blind very well. Cut him loose! Another one that came on with all the promise in the world and instead has been reduced to being a sad caricature on the show. Bye-bye Smokey the Bear…it's like we never knew ya.

No surprise that I received no response from forwarding my column to the powers-that-be. Didn't think I would. I am just a pro-bono columnist. That's all. But what makes people like me important is that I have the unique opportunity to take the 'virtual pulse' of the viewers of this show. I know many have stopped watching altogether. I have toyed with the same thing myself, especially after weeks like this. Anymore drunken boat sex and I will. But I asked myself this question right before turning on the laptop today: Why would anyone watch this show anymore? What makes the remaining viewers tune in at all? That, my friends, is my question of the week.

The Soap Box

Pat said: '…I thought the writers had a good thing going with those two (Brooke and Nick)…I am thoroughly disgusted that they screwed that one up and are back to considering reuniting Brooke and Ridge…I have decided it's not worth watching anymore.'

Yellow Rose wrote: 'I have watched from Day 1…right now I just plain don't watch and as another poster said, I read the message boards and read your Scoops.'

Deb screams: '…MR. BELL-RIDGE/BROOKE, LET IT GO! TAYLOR COMES BACK FROM THE DEAD TO KILL DARLA-ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I DIDN'T LIKE THE ACTRESS PLAYING DONNA WHEN SHE WAS ON Y&R…WHAT ARE YOU DOING???'

Yikes! See? I have an inbox filled with folks just like these that really want o watch everyday but can't. It's like a bad ride at an amusement park that you can't get off. It just goes around and around until you feel sick and finally run screaming to the nearest trash can. Ok, well maybe that's a little dramatic, but you know what I mean.

I am hoping for a better week with something positive to write about. Geez, there really wasn't anything positive from three days of programming, was there? Someone stop the ride, please!

One more quick thing…I was walking through the grocery store collecting all of my snack foods for the first weekend of NFL football today when something caught my eye on the magazine rack. I'm not sure which soap 'rag' it was but Ronn Moss was on the cover and it referenced him leaving the show to 'become Ronn again, not Ridge.' Could Christmas be coming early for me this year? Could he finally be going so this nauseating love triangle of him, Brooke and Nick will ending once and for all? Has the world stopped spinning on its axis? One can only hope.

Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.
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