As Rick locked away his emotions about his divorce, Wyatt locked his divorce in a safe. Brooke sought to break her abusive relationship with the vodka delivery boy, and Aly's bed found a new lover. Nicole refused to let Maya sweep her past out with the trash, and Bridezilla Quinn fought Drunkie Kong Brooke over Deacon. Let the Two Scoops' battles and breakups begin.
Some are trying to get off that Beata alcohol. Some want to be free from "little-runt" tyranny. Others want a twelve-step program to a Brooke-free relationship. All but two want to figure out a way to get off that Maya Juice, and a third put the Maya Juice her in gas tank to fuel her model superstardom. My question is -- can anyone in Los Angeles -- besides Pam and Ridge -- just be honest about what they are doing and why they are doing it?
Maybe the closest to honest is the Maya-Juice-chugging Nicole, who Carter said was squeezing Maya like a high-octane raspberry for all the juice Maya could squirt into a modeling career for Nicole. It's funny that Maya always acts like she's on her last drop when Nicole asks for something, but when Maya felt threatened by Carter, she summoned enough juice to light Carter's career on fire if he chose to go against her wishes.
It's true. The blacker the blackmail, the sweeter the juice. Nicole successfully extorted herself right into a dancing-with-Oliver model test shoot. She had a little help from Ridge, who, emboldened by the power of "I told you so," allowed Oliver to give Nicole a taste of modeling to prove just how bad some spoiled Maya juice can be for business.
I'm not sure what Ridge meant to accomplish because, the next day, Maya and Rick graced Oliver and Aly with the honor of biting their tongues while Nicole wiggled and danced her way through her shoot. Nicole thought she'd rocked it, but Aly murmured that they had a lot of work to do. Nicole has a model face and fierce determination. Will she be a poor reflection upon Maya or put in the work Aly believes needs to be done for Nicole to become another of Rick's successes?
If Rick wins yet again by another accidental success that has everything to do with his minions' hard work and nothing to do with his daily office smooch fests with Maya, then I don't blame Ridge for telling Pam he's tired. Besides Pam, Ridge seems to have no gutsy allies. He lives in the land of great pretenders, and I doubt Carter will give Ridge the anti-juice he needs to remove Maya and Rick from power. His only midlife saving grace is Caroline's backside, but Rick has wedged Brooke into position to try to take even that from Ridge.
It was great seeing Caroline this week, even if she had a mammoth phone receiver covering half of her face. Brooke reminisced about the time before smart phones. I lived in that time. It still didn't stop me from wondering who the hell still has a landline -- and a five-pound phone. And here I thought New York was progressive. Caroline looked like she was holed up in an underground bunker somewhere -- albeit, still looking fresh and fabulous.
Caroline probably doesn't care if she communicates by email, landlines, or blind pigeons, as long as she doesn't have to subject herself to all the degrading slavery for Rick's glory. She's picked the perfect time for an extended vacation, with Brooke, Quinn, and Nicole slithering the hallways and shedding their dead skins all over the place in their efforts to become better people.
Too bad for Ridge, Caroline left him to fend for himself in the Forrester snake pit. As I said, Pam is on his side, and if I were Brooke, Rick, Quinn, Nicole, or Maya, I'd pass on the freshly baked lemon bars with the odd almond aftertaste.
Rick's commands fall upon Ridge with the weight an anvil. Maya's voice travels through his ears like the annoying buzz of gnat wings, and Brooke's harping rumbles through him like thunder. Without Caroline to keep his spirits up, he seems resigned to give up or give in. Pam reminded him of who he was and who'd mothered him, and her words were like wind beneath his weary wings.
The wind came just in time. Ridge needs all the gusts he can get now that Rick has deputized Brooke as the Ridge police. Sparring over Rick again was a rerun that Ridge changed the channel on when Brooke showed up to a meeting this week. And who can blame him? When Brooke champions Rick, Ridge loses family members or people wind up tumbling over the sides of buildings.
Brooke's been slinging man bait all over the place, but Ridge wasn't stupid enough to take it -- unlike Deacon. To prevent himself from getting caught up in some sort of "you should have told me mess" with Brooke, Ridge set her straight at the beginning. He knew why she was back at Forrester, and he was clear that he couldn't give her what she wanted -- a chase to end her lonely, manless existence. Brooke's doing her "just like that" snaps again, but the magic is gone. She can't get any Forrester man -Ridge or Eric -- for fall for her nose crinkle anymore.
But Sharpe, who isn't the sharpest man tool in her arsenal loves that crinkle, and the BS spouted from the mouth beneath it. "This might possibly, kind of, be the start of me thinking about maybe considering that this could be our time -- but you're with Quinn, so…" Brooke told Deacon the other week. Deacon jumped at the bait, and Quinn caught him with a big old Brooke hook jabbed in his mouth. Ridge, on the other hand, is too experienced to even nibble at Brooke's stale history and R.J. bait.
"I never knew you were so arrogant!" Brooke retorted when Ridge accused her of trying to get him back to being interested in her. Ridge was surprised. "You didn't?" he asked and noted that he'd been that exact way all his life! Brooke claimed to be all about family and protecting Rick, but Ridge quipped that Rick wasn't on Ridge's radar unless Rick put himself there.
No, Ridge isn't thinking about Rick -- or Brooke or R.J. Instead, Ridge is thinking about all the colors that will burst through Caroline's mind when he next strokes her -- with his paintbrush, that is. And Ridge isn't thinking about new or existing children, either. He's not studying Steffy's feelings or meddling in Thomas' life. He's floating and happy for the first time in a long time, but Brooke wants to rip him down from his Caroline cloud and drag him back into the Bridge abyss.
Brooke's move against Ridge and Caroline aimed to plant the seeds of "I told you sos" by questioning him about having children with Caroline and to warn him that he'd be back around Brooke's way. People do need to discuss certain things in relationships. Rick needs to know that he won't have biological children with Maya. Quinn needs to know Deacon's feelings for Brooke. Should Ridge tell Caroline that he doubts he'll have children with her or probably isn't considering a lasting relationship with her?
When Ridge and Caroline embarked upon the relationship, they agreed that it was experimental. Neither knew where it was going. Will Brooke's venom permeate the love cocoon that Ridge and Caroline knitted for themselves? Maybe Brooke's meddling will cause Caroline's desire for children to crack the cocoon, giving the black widow Brooke just enough space to slip in and kill their joy.
When Ridge was on the phone with Caroline, he asked if she'd go dancing. It was an odd question, and she stammered that she wasn't in the mood for dancing lately. I thought of Linsey Godfrey's car accident and recovery at first, but Caroline isn't injured like the actress is. Then I wondered…With all this children talk from Brooke…Nah, Caroline's not coming home pregnant -- is she? Or is she?
It's probably just this scooper's overactive imagination. What's more likely to happen is a rebroadcast of the Bridge show. I'll get to say "I told you so," but Caroline can't drag a single person into some "you should have told me" mess because everyone warned her about Ridge -- and Ridge and Brooke.
I suspect that since Quinn is guarding her henhouse, Brooke is about to slither into Caroline's henhouse and steal Ridge. If this happens, combined with Maya's past coming out, will there be a rekindling for Caroline and Rick?
The busybodies at Spencer, who have nothing better to do than sit around discussing how salacious the paint-drying is at Forrester, pondered the situation and made some predictions. Katie told Bill and Liam that Rick was going on about honesty, but Rick had forgotten about it when he'd shacked up with Maya. Katie added that Rick had also forgotten Maya's gold-digging days. While Katie was staking out Brooke's bushes, she must have read some Soap Central recaps to come up with some accurate history.
Bill doesn't buy Rick's Maya devotion routine. He believes that Rick would jump at the chance to reunite with Caroline. From his ass hairs must be where Bill plucked this hunch because Rick has said nothing whatsoever to indicate that he'd ever go back to Caroline. Maybe upon hearing about Maya's untold truths, Rick will see shades of grey in Caroline's indiscretion and want her back. If he does, I hope she gives him a "how dare you" louder than Maya bellowed this week at Carter.
Carter's flashbacks on his romance with Maya didn't need captions because it was painfully apparent on his face what he was really thinking -- "How could I not tell that I was stroking a man?" When he asked Maya to marry him, he had to believe that he knew her, she knew him, and he could trust her to do what was in his best interest. Knowing him as she did, can Maya really say that she acted in his best interest or her own?
Judging by Maya and Carter's blowout this week, I see Maya as the most selfish character to ever land in Los Angeles. No wonder Maya's a good singer. She's got the "Me, me, me, me, me!" vocal warm-up down pat. Everyone is supposed to understand her. Everyone is supposed to sympathize with her, but when in the hell does she sympathize with others and care how her choices impact others?
The most Carter gets from Maya is, "You're right. I should have told you." And she follows it right up with blaming Carter for the reason she didn't tell him. "It is so hard to make someone who has never had to question their identity understand what I went through, the changes I had to make to become my true self," she tells Carter.
But -- who did you ever tell it to, Maya? Who did you ever try to make understand the changes you had to go through? Jesse? That's who she claims saw her through her transition. How does she know that Carter -- or anyone else -- has never questioned his identity? Hell, Quinn just went through questioning herself and her own sanity. Brooke is going through an identity crisis right now, too. Nicole went through one while trying to understand her family during her childhood.
Maya doesn't want to be judged, but she has done a lot of judging of every single person around her and deemed every one of them unable to understand her. This prejudging precluded her from telling her past to the men she got involved with. Maya keeps screaming that she's a woman, and it's who she is; however, Carter said that if she wasn't ashamed of who she was, then she wouldn't hide it. Maya responded that hiding it was a mistake, but she'd been insecure and thought he wouldn't love her.
Why would she think that if Jesse loved her through it, Carter couldn't? And what is Maya hiding if being a woman is "just who I am!" She's actively doing everything "society" deems as "womanly," so why does she agree that she's hiding her true self? Does she mean she's hiding the fact that if she commits a crime and leaves DNA, the police will test that DNA and look for a male perpetrator? Is she hiding the fact that if archeologists dig her up in the future, they will find a male skeleton?
Since she is being a woman in plain sight, it must be the DNA and skeleton she's hiding. Maya swears she learned from hiding those things from Carter and said she'd tell Rick when and if Rick proposes to her. "I proposed to you!" Carter bellowed. He said Rick deserved to know who she was. Maya declared that Rick would know, but it was her story to tell.
I don't understand Maya. She can't be proud of who she is and also actively hide it. She can't tell Carter that she should have told him but still refuse to tell Rick. It's selfish and dishonest.
Never once does Maya apologize to Carter for not being respectful of his relationship needs. I glean that this revelation was something he wanted to know before having sex with her, not before proposing. She doesn't seem to make the connection that, just as she felt wrong in her body, he might feel wrong for copulating with a human who also has male DNA and a male bone structure.
This makes Maya a selfish bitch, and it disparages honest, real-life transgender people who reveal themselves before their partners get emotionally or sexually involved. What makes me angriest about Maya is her indignant attitude toward Carter. "How dare you tell him so!" she yells at Carter for attempting to tell Rick. She yells that it's none of Carter's business, but she let Carter put his key in the lock of her business by sleeping with him.
Carter yells that Maya used to be a man, but she commands him to respect her womanhood. How can he if she never respected his manhood? She might need certain things to feel like a woman, and Carter might need certain things to feel like a man. Maybe sex with what he deems "used to be a man" robs him of his manhood just as she claims being forced to be a male robbed her of her womanhood.
Maya claims that the Rick she knows will accept her for who she is. She insists upon telling Rick on her own terms, but Carter noted that her terms are delay tactics. She's already proven that a proposal won't make her speak up. And what about Rick's terms? When would Rick have wanted to know this?
How can Maya dare tell either man she loved him without taking enough care to ensure he could handle her situation? Was she so weak-minded in her search for love that she didn't care that she received love from a man who she knew, deep inside, would reject her for her past struggles and changes? Wouldn't Maya prefer that the man know exactly who she is and what she's gone through and still love her? Wouldn't anything short of that be a lie? Doesn't Rick deserve a nonjudgmental woman whose first instinct is not to fear his reactions?
I wish Carter had told Rick and done it just as indignantly as Maya did it to Caroline. Maya gave Caroline zero chances to tell Rick about her feelings while working with Ridge. Maya reveled in revealing it to Rick, so why should she get a break from Carter? Maya claimed that she told Caroline's "secret" because Maya had refused to let Caroline make a fool out of Rick. By the same token, Carter should refuse to let Maya make a fool of Rick.
Maya threatening Carter's job was desperate and laughable. She attacked him for not being open-minded, but he was right. She hadn't given him or Rick the chance to be open-minded, and she's just as quick as that cobra, Nicole, in trying to blackmail Carter into silence. Sympathy for Maya, I have none. Live by truth's sword, die by truth's sword.
Will truth's sword strike next week? I doubt it. We have a cliffhanger set up for it, though. Rick found a bottle of conjugated estrogen pills on the floor and asked Maya why she needs them. She looks afraid, like the jig is up; however, I'm sure she'll give him some bogus medical excuse on Monday, and the couple will go back to sucking face while Carter anguishes in brow-furrowed silence.
It'll be pretending as usual at Forrester. Nicole will continue to make herself into something she isn't -- a model. Aly and Oliver will pretend Nicole has talent. The Forrester team will have to suffer in silence, afraid to tell anyone the truth about Maya or Nicole or to rile up Quinn. Brooke will keep pretending that she isn't gravitating right back to Ridge or hedging her bets with Deacon.
Deacon gets the award for pretender of the week. Am I missing something, or did that man go over to Brooke's house the other week and beg her to tell him that they could have another chance? Did he not tell her how deeply he was feeling her and how she was the woman for him? Because after what he told Quinn this week, I thought maybe the talk with Brooke had been just as big of a fantasy as Quinn stabbing Brooke was.
I'm proud of the way Quinn handled things for the most part. It's as close to sane as we've ever seen her. Her therapist never did a damn bit of good, but there might be something to say for sexual healing. The increased blood flow and endorphins might have leveled out her chemical imbalances; however, nothing destroys a woman's progress like Brooke Logan's need for attention.
Quinn isn't asking for too much. She wants Deacon to be honest about his feelings, she wants Brooke to keep her hands and cocktails to herself, and she wants this tempting relationship to end. Deacon claims that Quinn has nothing to worry about, and he only wants her. He even tried to pin her down on a wedding date. What he didn't do was tell her that she was right -- he is just as weak around Brooke as he is around whiskey, and he will stay away from Brooke for the same reason he said he'd stay away from whiskey -- so he doesn't screw up what he has with Quinn.
So what is the twelve-step program to get over a man's addiction to Brooke? Is there a program that doesn't involve the man having to leave town or the country for years? Quinn's off to a good start by promoting honesty and trying to figure out if she can deal with it, but Deacon is a selfish pig for his dishonesty and for even wanting Brooke despite the happiness and acceptance Quinn provides him. Or maybe he's just sticking by Quinn for fear of being stuck by her like Liam almost was.
Brooke is being completely unreasonable. If she were any friend to Deacon, which she never has been a day in Hope's life, she would back off; concentrate on Rick, Forrester, and R.J.; and let Deacon and Quinn implode themselves. Brooke knows very well how counterproductive interference is in relationships, and Lord knows she was subject to plenty of it in her lifetime. She wishes she and Ridge had made better choices for their family in prior years. Well, she should have learned from those prior years and her rounds with Stephanie, Taylor, and Macy to know to leave well enough alone with Quinn.
There's another wedding on the horizon, and Brooke is determined, despite what anyone else says, to stop Deacon from marrying Quinn. Will Brooke succeed, or will Quinn stop her dead in her tracks? Hope will make an appearance via Skype. She's supposed to hear some shocking news. Is the news that Brooke actually gives a damn what Deacon does? Steffy's also on her way back to L.A., and she'll certainly give Ivy more to worry about than how necklaces complement Maya.
What do you think will happen next week? Will Maya be honest with Rick about the pills? Will Quinn's wedding take place, and could Wyatt convince his new pal Carter to officiate? Will Rick's new letter opener make another appearance? If so, who will Rick stab? My vote is Maya; what's yours? Till it all unfolds next week, stay Bold and Beautiful, baby!
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