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 Two Scoops: June 18, 2007 columns
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Alison Sweeney
Forklifts, DiMera tunnels, and Lexie
For the Week of June 18, 2007
It seems fishy that the only thing that Stefano wants in exchange for ending his decades-long vendetta against the Bradys is for Sami to marry E.J. and raise their baby as a DiMera.


Hey scoopers! You know it's been a good week if I don't even know where to start. And can I just say that Days is clawing its way back up the ratings? We jumped to number five last week from the seven and eight basement that we have been in for the past couple of months it seems. That makes me a very happy person. I firmly believe that Days can make its way back into the top two with good storylines. I have faith people!

But I'm not quite sure that I have faith in EJ just yet. It seems fishy that the only thing that Stefano wants to end his decades long, mind-controlling, kidnapping, torturing vendetta against the Brady's is for Sami to marry EJ and raise "their" baby (I'm not quite buying into Celeste's shirtless voodoo ritual) together as a DiMera. I still don't quite get what is in it for Stefano. It's not like the bloodline wouldn't continue anyway if the baby is EJ's and I'm sorry, but making EJ happy is not a good enough reason to end all the years of misery that Stefano has heaped upon the Bradys. There has got to be more to this, especially now that we know that Sami is a dead ringer (yeah, I know, bad pun) for the mysterious Colleen Brady. I cannot wait to see what happens next.

Chelsea and Nick both need to put the brakes on, because they are annoying me to death. All of that drama over three missed phone calls? Okay, let me back up because I seem to be getting ahead of myself. Nick and Chelsea were at the inquest into Willow's death (which was ruled an accident, thank God) and Nick starts waxing all poetic about how he needs to know that he has something to look forward to as far as he and Chelsea are concerned. When you strip what he said of all of the bullcrap and talking in circles, basically he meant that he wants to sleep with Chelsea. She of course asked where and he very romantically suggested the apartment he had leased for Willow. Yeah, that's sexy. Chelsea eventually (reluctantly) agreed and went home to wait for Nick's call, where she found a half naked, yet completely annoying Jeremy, who was staying there at Hope's invitation. Jerk-emy then decided it was funny or whatever to plant a kiss on Chelsea, who threatened him with bodily harm and then threatened to call Stephanie. Jeremy, then guilt tripped Chelsea into going with him to a very small get together at Stephanie's apartment (actually Steve and Kayla's apartment) so the two of them, along with Stephanie and Jett could celebrate the beginning of their stupid little airline scheme. Long story short, they get there, Stephanie has Chelsea try on their new "uniforms" (which consisted of a belt, a piece of ribbon and two band-aids pretty much). Chelsea is uncomfortable, since she is barely dressed, but Stephanie jumps on top of Jeremy and asks him to "fly her." So, they start making out like Jett and Chelsea aren't even there (which is so gross) and Jett gives Chelsea his shirt to wear so she doesn't look like Hooker Barbie walking back to her house. Why she couldn't have changed back into her own clothes, I don't know, unless they were trying to get out of there before Jerk-emy and Sweet Cheeks's clothes started flying. But I digress. Jett and Chelsea went back to Bo and Hope's house where she just out of the blue started freaking out about how she left her cell phone at home - I'm sorry I have to interrupt myself here. Chelsea left her cell phone at home. This is the same girl who was so busy sending a text message that she ran over her little brother and didn't even know it. She never leaves home without that phone, so I'm supposed to believe that she was so distracted by Jeremy's jerkiness that she left it? Give me a break. Okay, back to what I was saying. Chelsea started flipping out because Nick had called her for their rendezvous and she had missed it. She tried to call him back, he didn't pick up and then she started wailing to Jett about how she was afraid Nick was mad at her and their relationship was over. [Record Scratch] What?!?!? Over a missed phone call? You were all ready to jump his bones, but since he has missed a grand total of one phone call, your relationship is in the toilet? Wow.

But what made this scenario extra sad is that Nick didn't act any better. He and Shawn went the to the Brady Pub for a couple few drinks (which Nick drank way more of than Shawn). Nick proceeded to spill his guts after trying to call Chelsea and not getting an answer. He told Shawn that tonight was supposed to be his and Chelsea's first time together and she wasn't answering his calls, so she must be disgusted by him. Okay, I really wasn't too bothered by the fact that Nick just told his girlfriend's brother that he had made plans to deflower her that night, and only because Shawn and Chelsea didn't grow up together and don't really know each other that well so it wasn't too weird. Fast forward fifteen years and put Theo Carver in Nick's place and Ciara in Chelsea's place? Shawn would have knocked him out. But back to the story at hand. Shawn told a very inebriated Nick that he should get a cab and go over and talk to Chelsea. I'm not really sure why he couldn't have just called her back since he missed her calls because he had his ringer turned off, but then he couldn't have caught Chelsea wearing Jett's sweatshirt and what looked like nothing else (she still had on the "flight attendant's" uniform, but it was so short and low cut it looked like she wasn't wearing anything but the sweatshirt) and threaten to kick his ass. Yep, that's right people. Nick went Steven Segal on Jett for about five seconds before Jett remembered he had been in the military and managed to subdue Nick without hurting him. No hard feelings though. Nick then proceed to have what Chelsea referred to as a heart to heart with the porcelain goddess for the rest of the show, while Chelsea figured out that she still has not forgiven him for sleeping with her mom back when Chelsea wouldn't even given Nick the time of day. Sigh. Once again, there is no way these two should even be thinking about sleeping together until they get over their issues and their insecurities. Anyone who would trip that bad over less than five missed or unanswered phone calls is not mature or responsible enough to deal with having sex. They didn't hear from each other for like two hours and they were both ringing the death knell for their relationship. Good Lord, I haven't seen that level of immaturity since I was in junior high.

While Shawn was back in Salem dealing with the Willow stuff (just to recap, her death was an accident, the baby wasn't Shawn's but the Bradys are going to pay for the burial anyway) Philip and Belle arrived at the pageant, which had already ended. Long story short (again) Shawn joined them and they found out that Claire had been disguised as a little boy named Jeffrey. They tricked Jeffrey's "mom" into coming back and fun ensued from there. She claimed not to know anything and Belle kept trying to beat her to death. This whole story is so damn ridiculous I can't even talk about it anymore. Look, I watch four soaps everyday, so suspending my disbelief isn't a stretch, but are they really asking me to believe that someone kidnapped a baby from the middle of the ocean in the middle of a raging freaking typhoon for the sole purpose of entering beauty pageants? Days, you're almost there. Please start making sense.

Doug, Julie, Bo and Hope got into Doug's old nightclub to take a look in the tunnels for some information on the Brady/DiMera feud. That was curtailed a little bit when they heard what sounded like a banshee screaming. Bo went into the tunnel to investigate, and was conked over the head by said screaming banshee. The banshee then proceeded to climb up the rope Bo just climbed down and started choking the stuffing out of Hope. Doug and Hope got her mask off, and it was none other than Lexie, who apparently has been held captive in that dark tunnel for the past couple of months. No one knows where Tek is though. I think this is a great way to bring Lexie back. I was getting a bit burned out on her character last year, so the break didn't hurt.

But back to that tunnel. Bo and Hope (after she woke him up) combed the tunnel with a flashlight and fine toothed comb looking for any clues about the cause of the feud. Hope found a photo album in an old moldy box and a clear, undamaged picture fell out, labeled "Colleen Brady, Galway Bay." And this was the picture that showed that Sami is the spitting image of Colleen. Alas, Bo and Hope have not had a chance to tell anyone this, because the next box they opened happened to be a music box with a bomb in it. What really sucked is that there were only about two minutes on the timer from the moment they opened it, so they don't even have time to get up the rope before it blows. What will happen to them? I guess we'll have to see on Monday.

SOME RANDOM THOUGHTS

I know that I didn't talk about Steve and Stephanie's little reunion/confrontation. I was so disgusted with her selfishness and her behavior, I kept hoping Steve or Adrienne would just hit her. And Jeremy. I hate both of them right now, they are so cocky, disrespectful and disgusting. Yeah, Steph we know that you aren't a slut, but you sure are dressing up like one at the moment, huh? And talking like one, and . You know, never mind. I just hope they give her a (well another) personality transplant or get her and her boy-toy off my screen.

Lucas saved EJ from a beam that fell on his legs after someone (I think Tony) tried to run him and Sami over with a forklift. And of course, Lucas could not resist reveling in the irony of that for a moment. I'm glad that they used Lucas a little less this week, because his ranting is beginning to wear on my nerves.

I'm glad that Marlena and John are back together, I really am. I just hate to watch them make out in public like two teenagers. Don't mind kissing, I just don't like when John tries to eat her face in front of people.

I loved the fact that a not-so-ill seeming Stefano walked into the pub like he owned the place to speak with Marlena and John. He told them about offering Sami a truce, but of course he wouldn't quite tell them what that was. I love Stefano, especially dressed up all snazzy like he was this the purple handkerchief and tie. I would watch that man read the phone book, he is so awesome.

So what will happen next week? Will Bo and Hope go ka-blooey because of the music box? Will John be able to help them? Will Nick and Chelsea ever get it together? Will Belle find Claire, and will she keep getting closer to Phil? What will Abe's reaction to Lexie be? What will Stefano's reaction to Lexie be? Tune in next week and find out!



Until Next Time!

Melissa


Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.



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