I'm no good for you
For the Week of January 16, 2006
Other Two Scoops for the week of January 16, 2006
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January 23, 2006
Often times we sabotage ourselves, do we not? We come up with excuses why a thing won't work and convince ourselves the reasons we made up in our head are true

Often times we sabotage ourselves, do we not? We come up with excuses why a thing won't work and convince ourselves the reasons we made up in our head are true. Our fears drive us to hurt ourselves before someone else hurts us. "Oh, he won't want to go with me to a movie anyway, so I won't ask." "Oh, she would never want to be with a guy like me, why should I humiliate myself by asking her?" We sit around loving someone for a year or 5 or 10 and keep coming up with every conceivable reason why it can't possibly be and make ourselves miserable rather than allowing love to take its course. We hijack our own agenda, we don't have love because we put up our own roadblocks to keep it out; we're the thieves who are stealing our own dreams.

Sonny tells Emily "You're better off without me." And the whole town passionately sings the Hallelujah chorus behind him, only strengthening his self loathing and his deeply held belief that he doesn't deserve to be loved. But he does deserve to be loved, as flawed as he is. We all deserve to be loved.

This whole mess is really all Michael's fault. Sonny had successfully given Emily the brush off up until she threw herself into an icy pond to rescue Michael and his basketball after he had run away AGAIN. (Or is the basketball still floating around out there for some other kid to find?) After Sonny initially told Emily he wasn't interested she took a little detour and went out with Dr. Patrick Drake, much to Robin's dismay. Quite frankly, Robin seems to be dismayed by everything. Lighten up Robin. Some of you got very perturbed last week when I didn't take Robin's side, but guess what, I'm not taking her side again this week. If you are a professional and you work with someone who is a jerk, you don't get to tell everyone who walks in that your coworker is a jerk. Robin is just standing around at the Nurses' Station telling anyone who gets off the elevator what a pig Patrick is and most jobs would fire her. In fact, who actually HIRED her? She came from Paris to try to drug treatment on Jason which didn't work, so who made her the big sheriff of the hospital? Did I miss something? Did she ever fill out an application?

It was a good couple of days for Patrick; he got to steal a kiss with Carly, while annoying Robin in the process. Next, Emily hit on him and landed a date with Patrick even though it ended up in a bar brawl at Coleman's place. Aren't there any other dive bars in that town? If only they were in San Diego I could send them to the Pacific Shores in Ocean Beach where they could drink and look at glowing neon mermaids at the same time. Or so I've heard...

Of all the lame reasons they have conjured up to see Luke off on his annual vacation, this may be the dumbest - rat poison in the martini? Dillon's original concept was quirky and fun, just like he is. Dillon's my type. Well, except that he's like 19 and I'm 44. He's a little nerdy, a film buff, and sees everything through the eyes of the silver screen, and he's inventive and original. I love that kid. This time Dillon convinced Luke to let Tracy think he wanted to kill her, thinking the fear would convince her to give him that divorce he's been wanting. Instead, the fake murder plot became real, as an anonymous gloved hand actually poured the rat poison into the drink. Hmmm. Someone ran down Dr. Meadows in a hit and run and tampered with the paternity test, and someone mysteriously tried to poison Tracy and frame Luke. Who does that sound like to you? My guess is Helena. She hates Luke, she hates Tracy for reneging on their deal to break up Emily and Nikolas, and she might want everyone to think Courtney's baby is Jax's so she could kidnap it and raise it as her own or some other dastardly Helena plot. Seriously, doesn't that sound like her? Just a guess.

Sam wants a baby, and Jason tries to put her off by saying he is worried for her health, but she can't let go of that dream. She wants a baby and she wants Jason to be the father. Jason's dangerous lifestyle came into question via Alexis, which is amusing as one of Sonny's 3 kids is hers (and probably soon he will have 4 kids as he's about to bed Emily and we all know what a potent dude Sonny is.) so obviously a gangster can procreate. Of course, Sam and Jason's kid would be subject to kidnapping and dodging bullets occasionally, but I guess kids get used to it, look how well adjusted Michael is! (That was a joke.)

There are meddlers in Port Charles who are always deciding what is good for everyone else. Those know it alls who make a point of manipulating a situation and people so their agenda is played out. Never mind what the people actually want for themselves. Alexis arrests Jason and then tells Sam that it is okay because she's better off without him, even though Sam doesn't believe she is better off without him. Carly decides to try to manipulate her "best friend" Courtney into going back to Jax because it secured her 50% of Jax's hotel. Robin has decided Patrick is no good and runs around warning women about him, like she's a Public Service Announcement. People who are constantly putting their nose into other peoples lives do so because they don't want to deal with their own issues in their own lives. It's so much easier to run someone else's life than your own, isn't it?

Close your eyes and think for a moment about all the times people vehemently advised you against doing something which you did anyway - aren't you glad you did it, even if things didn't turn out exactly right? Of course, if your scheme is a really ridiculous one like trying to convince your wife Tracy that you want to kill her so she will give you 15 million dollars and divorce you, things are bound to go wrong. Luke, however, has never been one to think things through. Tracy is missing; her car has gone over an embankment, there is a martini shaker full of booze and rat poison, the kids, Skye and Alice all know more than they are saying, and Luke has vanished for another long while. Kind of a bummer since the Lulu/Luke relationship was becoming a thing of beauty. We caught the hint that Lulu may bond a little with Skye which is great, but I still want more of Lulu and Daddy.

Nikolas is a confused man. He wants Courtney to fly off and get a quickie divorce and marry him, yet he's out punching guys in the face who date his ex-wife, Emily. You'd think if he was so over Emily that he was ready to remarry, then he wouldn't feel the need to track down Em's dates and hit them. But hey, that's just me. And personally, I wouldn't marry Courtney - anyone who is on their 4th husband while she is still in her 20's isn't a very good risk. With failed marriages to AJ, Jason, and Jax behind her in less than 5 years, what makes Nikolas think she'll stay true to him? And poor Patrick, both Sonny and Nikolas came after him for dating Emily - will he think she's worth the trouble of a second date?

What will happen tomorrow dear readers? Will Courtney ever have to buy a maternity top? Will Nanny 911 come to Carly and Sonny to help them get "Run Away Michael" under control? Will Luke tell the cops he thought the rat poison was Skinny-N-Sweet? (Please someone, get that reference.) Will Skye finally see the light and take a tumble with Lorenzo while Luke is off on his latest escape? Will Carly adorn the tables at the Metro Court dining room with bowls of Prozac and Paxil as it seems everyone who goes there needs to be on medication? Will Sam stop crying long enough to actually get pregnant? Will Dillon cave in and confess his whole movie-based plan to the police? Will Noah leave rehab and find a Happy Hour on the way back into town?

Only tomorrow knows dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

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