Ten rounds with Jose Cuervo

For the Week of May 8, 2006
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Ten rounds with Jose Cuervo
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I dig tequila. Mind you, I work at a church, and my Dad was a pastor and most people I associate with frown on booze, but I say again, I dig tequila.

I dig tequila. Mind you, I work at a church, and my Dad was a pastor and most people I associate with frown on booze, but I say again, I dig tequila. I watched the girls licking salt and slamming shots and sucking limes and envied them. I haven't done that in a really long time, and I even have a really good heartache in mind to get drunk over. The girls at GH 'Bad Day' as the song said and decided to waste away again in Margaritaville. While they looked like they were having fun, I sure hope my doctors aren't out getting hammered and then showing up to the hospital with massive hangovers the next day.

Question, isn't Jake's supposed to be in some sleazy part of town? Aren't there any bars in a little safer neighborhood for a bunch of chicks to frequent? And since when do doctors go out drinking with student nurses and med students who haven't been to class in 6 months because they are "banging" their mob boss boyfriend. (Emily's word, not mine.) On another note, I decided I like Robin a lot better when she is hammered. She actually smiled when she was drunk. I saw her teeth!

Back to Emily... Even when she was drunk I was silently resenting her because she actually said "Yes, Sonny did try to have my brother killed, but Sonny made a mistake and he promised he won't do it again." Emily!?!? C'MON! My Mom is gullible like that, too - every report card I have from elementary school has a note on the back of it from my Mom to my teacher that says "Tammy promises she won't talk out of turn and disrupt the class anymore." And I think she actually believed it!

Don't misunderstand, I am all for forgiveness, but I think Emily forgave Sonny a little too fast. Give the guy a chance to actually think about what he almost did. I have had a few disagreements, sometimes even big ones with my 2 best pals, and never once did I put a hit out on them! Even many shots of tequila doesn't explain the muddled reasoning that Emily would have to buy into in order to sleep with a guy who tried to murder her brother just hours after it happened. Carly had it right when she asked Sonny "What if Jason HAD been killed, who'd be looking out for me and the boys, then? At least someone is thinking.

Dr. Patrick Dreamboat lost his first patient and his father Noah, Dr. Dreamboat Sr. stepped in and intervened to lend a hand. A very tender exchange between the two that I hope will lead to less bickering and more bonding between my two favorite doctors. While Patrick was struggling emotionally with losing a patient and having flashback memories of his Mom, the female hospital staff was off having booze induced sex fantasies about him. Guys - wouldn't you like his job? Imagine being Jason Thompson and you go to work and your boss says "Okay. Jason, today we want you to take off your shirt and make out with a whole bunch of hot babes." - And likewise I kept thinking about the girls who get paid to go to work and make out with a honey like Dr. Drake. God, did I make bad career choices!

The person who most needed and deserved a night out getting looped was Elizabeth. Ever since her honeymoon ended up in a giant train wreck, she has endured one trauma after another and since Lucky is all doped up on Morphine, shouldn't Liz be entitled to a little sedation, too?

Carly never gets invited to Girl's Night Out, but she sure could have used one. Manny set her up to be a sitting duck in his own private shooting gallery, and only because she screamed loud enough for John Durant to hear, did she survive. This is why it's good to be loud...Sadly, John didn't survive. If I have one criticism, it's this - I wish they would have let Carly and John develop a real relationship before he was bleeding to death. Great that they got to connect at all I suppose, but still... Corbin Bernsen was wasted in some ways- they wrote John Durant as a one dimensional character, but the actor who portrayed him was capable of giving us so much more had he been given the opportunity. Mind you, Bernsen's is the name I left out last week from the quote from the writers- that the story demanded losing him...And now, can you see why? Alexis has been named interim D.A., and she just found out Sam is her daughter. Jason was sitting faithfully by Sam's bedside (except for a brief field trip to hold a gun to Ric's manipulative head) and as soon as he got the news that Sam may not make it, he made a beeline to tell Alexis the truth, as Sam said she would want her mother to know IF she were dying. Alexis is also mother to Sonny's daughter, so there are some serious conflicts of interest for her in her new job. Imagine when she tells Ric she can't prosecute Jason because he's her daughter's boyfriend... Ric is doing everything he can to worm his way into Sonny's good graces, and yet with all his efforts he has been unable to get Sonny to hate Jason and that bugs him something fierce. He doesn't want Jason's job as Enforcer, but he does want Jason's place in Sonny's heart and I don't think he will ever get it.

I don't think Robert or Luke will either one end up with Holly either, I think she's playing them both, but isn't it fun to watch them? There is adventure and mystery and being on the run and getting to sleep in a sleeping bag between Tristan Rogers and Tony Geary? I bet those 3 are having more fun than they have had in years. I know I am having a wonderful time watching them. Chemistry is such a valuable thing and Robert Scorpio and Luke Spencer nearly glow with delight every time they are on screen together. I bet they are ad-libbing half of their lines just to see if they can catch the other off guard.

As to love and romance - we have some lovely examples right now - Jax and Carly, Jason and Sam, and Lorenzo and Skye - these are the couples who are exuding passion and commitment - couples who take joy in being together and who delight in one another's presence - couples who have actual conversations with one another and have the sort of relationships that make us wish it really existed outside of soaps. I can't decide what's worse, to believe it exists and hope for it and never be able to actually find it, or to become cynical and say "It doesn't exist" and just choose to live life without any glimmer of hope. A third and I suppose even worse option is having it and being an idiot and losing it and realizing you blew it. But I digress.

Carly knows Jax's secret about baby John, and now that Dr. Meadows decided to satisfy her curiosity, a fax machine in some dark office knows, too and eventually someone will pick up that fax and realize Jax has been lying about being John's father all along. I doubt that Nikolas will be understanding and give Jax visitation rights, so I would suppose that Jax will have to get Carly knocked up in order to be a father again. Or, who knows, maybe when Helena shows up and tries to steal the baby, Nikolas might play along with Jax's plan just to keep his son safe. He has a good teacher in Carly, she knows how to keep her sons safe. When Carly went to Sonny's and Emily tried to keep Carly from taking her kids home, I was rooting for a catfight, but it never materialized.

What will happen tomorrow dear readers? Will Sam have a Snow White Miracle Cure once her Mommy kisses her forehead? Will Coleman restart his Strip Club now that he has so many drunken babes in his bar? Will the Dr.'s Drake both go retake the class that teaches the surgical procedure at which they have both now failed? Will Robin stop being so bossy? Will Holly share get her amenities if Luke's friend doesn't lose his plane in a card game? Will anyone say anything nice at John Durant's funeral? Will Jax still buy the house next door to Carly now that it's full of bullet holes and blood stains?

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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