Antonio Sabato, Jr.
Monkeys, booze, and premature labor
For the Week of February 6, 2006
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Dante will have his hands full in the upcoming weeks, and it's about time! His is a character that has more to offer that just flexing pecs and cute dimples.

I mean, could it GET any weirder on this show? For weeks we have been in low gear with dying wishes and sniveling child brides madly crocheting on the couch. Now the world has turned upside down and we have left no stone unturned in the quest to really aggravate viewers far and wide. Bridget lovers are mad, Brooke lovers are worried and the so-called Bricky's and Bridgie's are at war again at the sight of Brooke being pulled in two different directions. IT'S MADNESS!!!!

Ok, let's start with what I actually liked this past week...first, I did enjoy watching Leslie Kay deal with the whole 'remarriage as a dying wish' thing. She did a great job with those scenes and I'm tellin' you, if Brad lets her go and shelves Felicia, it will be a travesty. I still say the notion of Stephanie and Eric having a fake marriage is a stretch but it was probably more noble for him to go through with it after Felicia gave them both an 'out'. He could have cut bait and hauled you-know-what to snuggle up with Jackie but no, he actually did something unselfish for the sake of his daughter. Of course none of his other kids can count on him doing the right thing by them but hey, it's a start, right??

No sooner have we dried the last weepy tears from our eyes than we have to witness Ridge try to recreate the Puerto Vista rainforest of seduction in Brooke's backyard. I had the same reaction as Nick...MONKEYS?? What?? Good Lord. He did all that in ONE day? Boy, these people have too much money, don't they? I have tried to give Brooke as much credit as humanly possible that she could stand firm and hold off Ridge's advances but now I have to say that I am getting a bit worried. The whole jungle scene was one thing but now he will use some garden-variety childhood illness with RJ to really put the pressure on next week. He seems determined to stop at nothing to manipulate Brooke back into his bed and I, for one, can't even fathom watching that sick and disgusting pairing for one more second. It's old. It's tired. We have all been there, done that. It couldn't stick years ago and it won't be any more palatable now. There is nothing that can convince me that Ridge and Brooke are the end-all, be-all of the soap world's romantic couples. No way, nothing doin'. But I suppose Brad and the Band of Amateurs know better than all of us who watch this day in and day out. One can only hope that Brooke remains strong and tells him in some more forceful way to go straight to Hell. He has a lot of nerve criticizing his ex-wife for hypocrisy when his own behavior is reprehensible at best. To all of the Brooke fans out there...doesn't she deserve a healthy relationship where she is NOT someone's sloppy seconds? Stay strong, girlfriend!! The only thing Ridge truly loves is himself, period. Maybe he should just take the monkey home and call it a night.

Now as I am a proud supporter of a Nick/Brooke pairing and always have been, I will say this much about the situation at the Malibu Beach House...when Bridget loses the baby, it makes this coupling much harder to revisit. Fans will see both Nick and Brooke as evil people to try to get back together while the Little Princess is grieving the loss of her child. I agree that it's a shame that the death of a baby has to be used as a plot device (albeit an imaginary baby), but honestly, the character of Bridget had this coming. I believe the appropriate term here would be 'karma'. I'm sorry but when she lied to Nick about aborting the baby to 'test' him and her mother, I felt then that she was not mature enough to have a child. That was the lowest of the low and now she is reaping what she sowed. Had she not pulled that on Nick I may have felt differently but now? Too bad, Princess. I feel worse for Nick that he has lost another child. He would be a wonderful Dad the way his character has been written and now if he were to lose Dominick too? Oh can your heart not go out to him? Talk about being born under a bad sign!

Dante will have his hands full in the upcoming weeks, though, and about time! His is a character that I feel has more to offer that just flexing pecs and cute dimples. He got screwed when Bridget decided to stay with Nick and now it looks like he may have a chance to be with her after all. Let's face it...Bridget is better off with someone that loves HER and no one else. Nick's heart is with Brooke, for better or worse, it's just a fact. But Dante is the only man in town besides Massimo that has NOT had a thing for Brooke. He's a safe bet and if Bridget has even two brain cells working together, she will jump at a life with him and not think twice. She could do A LOT worse!

Speaking of doing worse, how about that newly divorced wild woman Taylor Hayes, huh??? Oh no, not another foray into drunk driving and destructive behavior? Yes, in the kind of writing that we have become sadly accustomed to from the B&B writing corps, another previously strong female character has been reduced to a sobbing and irrational mess in her post-Ridge hours. Am I happy she is free from the Wooden One? Absolutely. It could not have happened any sooner for me but why do we have to make her instantly unstable and destructive? Why not have her lick her wounds and press on with her practice, determined to have the rest of her life be defined by her own actions and not by being the ex-Mrs. Ridge Forrester? Would that be SO hard to write? I would have loved to see her go out with Hector publically, re-establish her practice as the only shrink in LA, and really enjoy NOT having to compete with Brooke ever again. She should be holding her head up high, not getting high and crashing the car. Sad, sad, sad. Let's hope the writers are better to her character in the coming weeks. She's got a hunky fireman just waiting to be with her...let's see how many sparks we can create there and stop all the 'poor me' nonsense.

Speaking of Hector, I have to say that in the past I didn't see him as a very dynamic character as he was written before. I must say that recently I have noticed he has loosened up a bit and has me believing he could be a hot addition to Taylor's otherwise lukewarm life. He's nurturing, caring, and the ultimate do-gooder...a perfect match for Taylor. They look good together, too. They have my all they have to do is keep Wood-Zilla away from Taylor and they would be doing just fine! The nerve of that man to be sniffing around claiming that Hector would take advantage of Taylor! WHAT??? Is he nuts? Talk about the pot calling the kettle black! I was happy to hear Taylor tell him he gave up any right to comment on her choice of men when he declared he was through with their marriage. WHO-HOO!!! Hector is probably the only man on this show that you CAN'T accuse of being manipulative. He's a goody-two shoes right to the core. Me? I'd take Hector any day of the week and twice on Sunday (as they say). Ridge deserves to be alone...on an island...forever...never to be seen again...Ridge? Ridge who?

My rants for the week...what's up with the way Ridge touches the women in his life? He was dancing with his SISTER and caressing and pawing her face like he does with Brooke! EWWW! STOP IT!!! And a band with only like, 8 people in the Forrester living room? Wouldn't a radio have been enough? Why did Dante show up late? He should have been the one to bring her to the house, not Nick. And why do we only see Kristen when someone is dying or getting married? Why can't she come back for good? Who is dressing Nick's character these days? Peter Brady? I liked him better in turtlenecks and peacoats.

I must sign off now as my Steelers are kicking off in a few short hours and an entire season of Terrible Towel waving and blood pressuring-heightening plays (like the infamous fumble in Indy) has now come down to one last game. The Big One. For all those readers all over the world that have emailed me with your support for the Black and Gold, I thank you. I will either be back next week with bells on wearing my Ben Roethlisberger jersey, the alternative is too frightening to put down in the written word. Let's just say...GO STEELERS!!!

Kristine Cain
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