Teddi Mellencamp opens up about ex-husband Edwin Arroyave's affair, says she had 'beg him to stay'

Teddi Mellencamp, reality star of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, spoke publicly for the first time about her 13-year marriage to Edwin Arroyave, infidelity on both sides, her stage 4 cancer diagnosis, and how it has impacted her life on the second half of The Jamie Kern Lima Show of 5 August, 2025.

Teddi Mellencamp said that her estranged husband Edwin Arroyave's alleged affair took place more than 10 years ago, right before the couple made their debut on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Mellencamp claimed that she was personally approached by the other woman, who informed her about the affair right before filming for the series:

"It was with somebody I knew. I mean, I'm not saying that I didn't make huge mistakes, and in my marriage post that, but that broke me. That was the first time in my life where I was like, how will I show up every day with a smile on my face and raise these kids, and be this perfect wife and start a television show and become somebody that people like or they think are funny?"

Teddi Mellencamp also stated that the emotional impact of that discovery spilt over into her first season on RHOBH, which explains why some fans perceived her as more passive or guarded than her true self:

“My first season on Housewives, that’s what I was going through. People say, ‘Oh you seem kind of quiet or you were kind of passive or but that’s not really who you are.’ I was like, well I wasn’t faking who I was, I was coping. I was so scared that someone was going to find out and ruin my family’s life.”

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"Had to beg Edwin to stay"- Teddi Mellencamp

According to Teddi Mellencamp, as soon as Edwin's alleged affair came to light, their chemistry changed. Despite her attempts to preserve the appearance of a happy marriage, she revealed that things were already collapsing within.

“I had to beg Edwin to want to stay with me. I had to beg him. I don’t think he was in love with me at that point. I think we’ve gone through times in our marriage where we’ve been madly in love with each other, but that wasn’t one of those times.”

She later admitted that she only stayed because “then it got better.”

Teddi Mellencamp went on to add about her affair as well:

“People oftentimes think that if this happens in a marriage and even if it’s reversed — which you know people have said a lot of different things about me too — is that you’re doing it because you don’t have care for other people in your life. Sometimes you just don’t have enough care for yourself.”

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Teddi Mellencamp's affair with Simon Schröder

In the same podcast, she also revealed her own affair with her horse trainer, Simon Schröder, which became a subject of rumor after she had filed for divorce. As she wept, she said:

"Did I do things that hurt other people? Yes, I've never talked about it at all, just because of the kids, and I've never wanted anybody to have a guarantee whether it happened or didn't happen."

Schröder was also going through a divorce after Mellencamp, who filed on November 1, 2024, alleging irreconcilable differences. Schröder's ex-wife, Karli Schröder, filed for divorce on 30 December 2024, which is less than two months.

As she spoke about her affair with Schröder, she also wondered if it was "payback' for the destruction caused, as she has now been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. Speaking about this, she said:

"To this day, does it still hurt my heart and I wonder if that's why I got cancer? Yes, like it was my payback. Nothing goes without payment."

Teddi Mellencamp emphasized the huge amount of emotional harm inflicted by the affairs, not only to her and Edwin, but also to others who are involved as well.

"So many people are hurt in the wreckage. But I can say this from knowing -- the wreckage doesn't happen on its own."

She added:

“However long it was ... it was all over the press, it was everywhere. You're trying to minimise everybody's pain. You end up maximizing it. Because now not only do you have yourself, you have your significant other, your kids, the other person's significant other, their kids.”

She acknowledged having absolutely "zero control" of her actions at the time, as she was someone who was seeking peace during her suffering.

"I wasn't myself, but I'm not going to blame it all on that. A bunch of things happened in my life all around the same time, and I had zero control of any of them. Like I just was running around like a chicken with my head cut off."

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Edwin Arroyave and Teddi Mellencamp have put their divorce on hold for the time being, as she is suffering from melanoma. Though the divorce was filed, the two maintain good relationships with each other. Edwin is currently looking after her.

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