Balls, Strikes, and a Grand Slam: General Hospital Two Scoops For the Week of September 29-October 3

It was another sad week for General Hospital fans, but this time it wasn't because we had to say goodbye to a beloved character we'd known for decades. Instead, it was a sad week because we barely saw our Port Charles pals.

ABC decided that baseball had to be broadcast and not just streamed on its all-sport channel, ESPN. Nope, the network actually believed that people tuning in to watch TV in the middle of the afternoon wanted sports and not soaps. So, thanks to America's favorite pastime, GH was just a bookend this week, with new episodes only airing on Monday and Friday, but oh, what episodes they were. Let's dig in.

Monica and Veronica? Really?

Tracy wasn't happy to meet Monica's alleged sister | Image: ABC

So, GH managed to get THEE Erika Slezak out to Los Angeles and onto a soap opera set — and didn't make her Victoria Lord! Are you KIDDING us? Llanview and Port Charles exist in the same universe, which we have known for years. Lulu even works for Viki and mentions her all the time, yet GH creates a whole new retconned character for an absolute legend. Make it make sense!

And while we're pretty sure that this woman is indeed Monica's little sister (or "the runt of the litter," as Tracy called her), we know she is not in town to spread goodness and cheer. Marty is definitely behind her arrival, as well as what's to come next week (would have been this week, but ya know...baseball...) at Monica's will-reading.

Unfortunately, all we got of Ronnie this week was her confrontation with Tracy and some odd moments with Sonny that felt like they were thrown in to give Slezak and Maurice Benard some scenes together during her brief GH stint. Meanwhile, they didn't even work because Sonny didn't bother telling Ronnie that Monica didn't like him because he killed her son in cold blood and got away with it.

Britt knows what's up

James finally met his "father" | Image: ABC

We're thinking Britt might have had a point when she asked the adults in the room if maybe — just maybe — they should have asked themselves what Maxie would have wanted before springing a presumed-dead father on a very vulnerable James.

From Britt's reaction to seeing her not-so-dead 'brother,' it's pretty darn clear that is not Nathan in his pure form, as we have been surmising for the last two weeks. Either he has been brainwashed or memory-mapped, but that is not the Nathan we knew and loved and who "died" seven years ago.

And that's why our hearts break for James. The adults should have known he would wander into Nathan's room. He had just been told the dad he'd never met was alive, so yeah, this is James. What did they think was going to happen?

The only joy from these scenes came from watching Liesl and Britta together again. Their constant snipes at one another were everything we needed to make this short, bleak week a little bright.

"Molly's not gonna like it if you kill her mother!"

Alexis should have known Ric was there | Image: ABC

General Hospital brought Ric back onto the scene this week after letting him languish in Alexis' basement sight unseen for the last month. But the first question we have to ask is how Alexis didn't know that Ric was behind her in the living room when she lay her head on a pillow for a little power nap. How did she not SMELL this man who hadn't showered for nearly a month, and who actually pointed that out to her?

Ric has got to absolutely reek at this point, yet Alexis was so surprised when there was suddenly a dagger at her throat. She did a great job reasoning with Ric and convincing him not to kill her with the same weapon that Helena had used to kill her mother all those years ago. What would Molly think? (We asked the same question earlier this week. What would Molly think of this whole situation? Hmmm...)

Now, Ric is right back where he started. In Alexis' basement, stuck to a gurney with a ball gag in his mouth. Who didn't howl when Alexis pulled a pair of cuffs right out of her pants pocket like this was normal? Apparently, it must be a matching set with the ball gag she had in her glove compartment last month.

Who shot Drew? Who cares at this point?

Molly threw Michael right under the bus | Image: ABC

We have never seen a soap shoot itself in the foot (not the back) as badly as it has with a plot fans had been asking for all year. The setup for Drew's shooting was incredible, as was the immediate aftermath. Fans were cheering and in suspense. Many wanted him dead since there has barely been such an inexplicably awful character in years, but we knew that wasn't going to happen. So, we would have taken a memory loss or paralysis instead. But nope, Drew is fine, and we really do not care who shot him.

Cause honestly, if it wasn't Willow, what's the point? She had more motive than anyone else, and it would finally solidify her as the vixen her sister was, which is who she should be after shedding her purity mask this year.

Anna seems to be zeroing in on Michael, but we don't buy it. We also don't buy that Molly would throw her cousin under the bus as quickly as she did, but she did, so we'll just have to live with it. But it's not Michael. No way. And nope, it's not Carly either. So, we'll still go with Willow, even if we know GH won't let us have nice things when it comes to this story. The proof: Drew is fine. That's all the proof we need.