That's the Way, uh huh uh huh, I like it

For the Week of May 7, 2007
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That's the Way, uh huh uh huh, I like it
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When Friday's show ended, I was breathless. I love it when GH takes my breath away.

When Friday's show ended, I was breathless. I love it when GH takes my breath away. There are magical wonders in life I find indescribably beautiful; things like a perfectly executed double play in baseball, any painting by Maxfield Parish, a live performance by Prince, children in a dance recital, Balboa Park, a puppy curled up in your lap sleeping, and let's conclude this tragically incomplete list with the Highly Dramatic Soap Montage.

The end of Friday's show was a swirl of images -Jason's soulful eyes both mesmerized and frightened by the sight of his newborn baby getting CPR, Liz unconscious and hanging on by a thread, Nikolas down the hall with Patrick, Robin and Emily completely immersed in trying to keep him alive, Mr. Craig (a.k.a Jerry) driving frantically to GH to give Nik his shot, but pulled over for a routine traffic stop by an unsuspecting Lucky as we see Jerry reach for his gun, Skye running down the stairs as she realizes Lorenzo has taken Lila Rae and hidden her away someplace, and Sam glued to Jason's carpet in the penthouse, unable to make herself leave town when her gut tells her something's wrong...

Wow, that was quite an episode. There are weeks when I chide the writers, but it's always done in love. I know what they're actually capable of. It's like back when I was in school and I turned in some thrown together paper and ended up with a C when I could have gotten an A, and the teacher writing some note in red pen like "We both know you can do better than this Tammy." And some weeks the writers give us 'C' scripts and we KNOW they are capable of 'A' scripts because of weeks like this. Everything loose end came together in one brilliant episode Friday and I hope they send this one as part of an Emmy reel next year.

This was also a week of revelations. For instance, we learned Amelia is a Ho who will show up at the wrong hotel room and bed whoever is on the other side of the door. (For the sole amusement of my husband, I'm going to say the name "Bev".) Amelia was supposed to be meeting with her boss, and stumbled into Sonny's room by accident. Sonny did nothing overt to seduce her, and yet the next thing I knew, her blouse was off. I can't really blame her though, no woman has ever been able to be in a room with Sonny and not have sex with him. Well, except for Diane. Maybe she's a lesbian. Even so, I bet he could get her to switch teams, at least for one night. He's THAT potent.

Amelia may have some competition for the random sexual attention of Sonny, though, as some dame named Kate Howard just burst into Sonny's office demanding to use his phone and tried to kick him out of his own coffee shop. We all know how Sonny likes to tame Shrews. Who IS Kate Howard and if she's ALL THAT why doesn't she have a damned cell phone? I mean, even 11 year olds have cell phones these days. So let's suppose her cell battery died - what about her entourage? How about her driver? No one had a phone she could use? How 1980.

Lulu has multiple man troubles of her own, with Dillon, Spinelli, and Milo behaving like crazed stalkers at Carly's wedding until Lulu fled the insanity only to witness a shootout involving her new pal Logan. Rumor has it that Logan was initially going to be Scott's son, but TPTB got the idea to toss him into the Mob Madness and have sidestepped all those hints they gave us about Logan having some personal beef with Scott.

I'm sad about that, as I liked the idea of Scott having a hot headed son who ended up in a relationship with Laura's daughter, but alas, I don't always get my way. Kin Shriner is just another in the string of GH veterans brought back on the show with great fanfare, and is now rarely seen. We got a brief glimpse of him this week as he was lured to the Q's by Bobbie hoping to make peace between Luke and Scott, but to no avail.

Luke's' curiosity was piqued when Dillon dropped veiled accusations about what Scott did to Laura, but Dillon and Lulu managed to wiggle out of it when Luke pressed for details. Ghost Alan was along for the ride, which is still fun and fresh. Everyone thinks Tracy is crazy for talking to the chair, and rumor has it she will end up in Shadybrook as Laura's neighbor.

Jax and Carly are on their honeymoon, but have gotten sidetracked from their fun in the sand and surf when Carly got a sea urchin stuck in her butt. Jax offered to pee on it to get it to let go, but Carly declined, as would we all. Jax's pee is still pee, after all. Unbeknownst to the newlyweds, Lady Jane has realized that Mr. Craig is indeed Jerry Jax, and Uncle Jerry is over at Carly's place playing with Michael and Morgan. Can you imagine how completely Carly will lose it when she discovers that the maniac who terrorized her at gunpoint is now her brother-in-law and has had contact with her children?

Last week I laid out all the reasons why this storyline shouldn't work, but revisionist history aside, it's growing on me. The only thing I need from the writers is a convincing explanation about what happened to turn Jerry from troubled to outright evil. I read an interview with Bob Guza and he says there is a believable reason - so bring it on. Convince me. I think Sebastian Roche is fabulous and the scenes with Lady Jane this week were bittersweet. You can see his inner struggle, a lost man who on one level wants to be the son his Mother is looking for underneath an unfamiliar face, but knowing the truth, all the cruel and evil things he has done and knowing there is no way back. One rumor has Jerry under some spell of Helena, although why Helena would want to hurt Jax or Jerry is beyond me, unless it's payback for Jax pretending to be Spencer's father for a month. Then again, Jerry threatened Nikolas with "Putting your unfortunate mother out of her misery" which sounds exactly like something Helena might say... Who knows? I'll just have to keep tuning in until the mystery is revealed.

Here's a mystery I can't unravel- why on Earth would Sam confide in Amelia? A) She barely knows her. B) Amelia has proven that she's all about the show and doesn't much care about Sam. C) Amelia is Sam's boss and could fire her, so why bring up bad things from your past? Of course, all these are moot points, as Amelia already knows everything about Sam's sinful past, but Sam doesn't know that.

She confided to Amelia about being blackmailed by an ex-husband and confesses to marrying men and stealing their money and she's known her for two weeks. She hasn't told Alexis, her own mother, or Jason, her supposed soul mate, or anyone else, but chooses to confide her deep dark secret to Amelia? Odd choice, IMHO. Amelia of course uses the ruse as a way to ingratiate herself to Sam. I have heard rumors that our 2nd Amelia will soon be replaced by yet a 3rd actress, but I have been unable to verify that. Just in case, I wanted to give you a heads up to make sure you don't get too attached.

I hope Jason isn't getting too attached to his baby, because even though Liz gave him "If anything happens to me, you should step up" speech, she will regain consciousness before Jason finishes spilling the truth to Lucky. They will dive back into the dar waters of secrecy, more person will know. Someone is going to overhear Jason and Liz discussing the baby, and it isn't Lucky...

Lucky's brother Nikolas has parenting troubles of his own. As he hovers inches from death, Nikolas requests that Emily promise to raise Spencer if he doesn't make it. Emily resists making that promise, not because she hates changing Pampers, but because she can't accept that Nikolas will die and believes the promise is unnecessary. Her hope and faith remain constant, even when Nikolas seems to be taking his final breath. Robin agrees to pull the plug if need be, as Nikolas specified he didn't want to be kept alive by artificial means. But let's face it, if Lucky is any kind of cop, he will give Mr. Craig his traffic ticket and move along, so Nikolas should get his magic injection in time.

What will happen tomorrow? Will Amelia accidentally wind up at the D.A.'s office and have sex with Ric? Will Carly's swollen butt ruin her honeymoon? Will Michael bite Uncle Jerry when he realizes he's the dude who held Mommy and Daddy hostage? Will Alice realize how truly fabulous she looks in party dresses and quit her job at the Q's to be a plus size model? Will Elizabeth freak when she wakes up and realizes her baby is 3 times bigger than her pregnant belly was? Will Lorenzo's men realize they aren't really nannies and bring Lila Rae back home to Skye? Will Maxie recognize the aura of another skank in town and befriend Amelia?

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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