I can be your hero

For the Week of September 17, 2012
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I can be your hero
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Blackmailers, murderers, and mobsters put aside their differences this week to join the cops and play hero. This group of misfits and cops helped save the town from poison water and take down evil doer Jerry Jacks. Port Charles now has its own team of super heroes. All they need now is costumes, which may or may not be provided in this week's Two Scoops.

Attention Justice League: a new team of superheroes just helped save Port Charles. They don't have catchy names like "Superman," "Flash," or "Wonder Woman." But you can call them Dante, John, Jax, Sonny, Shawn, and Todd.

Port Charles is not short on heroes these days. When villain Jerry Jacks tried to escape this week, it was like a smorgasbord of action heroes arose from Port Charles to thwart his evil plans. There were plenty of heroes for all tastes: tall and short, blonde and brunette, blue-eyed or brown-eyed, cerebral and physical. All they needed were some capes, tights, and costumes, and we would have had our very own superhero story.

I'd like to thank the writers for bringing back the action. Not only that, we actually got to see our heroes outside, at a location shoot. It was beautiful! It seems like our characters haven't left the drab, gray confines of the hospital and the Port Charles' docks in years. The days of action location shoots went the way of Guiding Light and As the World Turns, as soap budgets have dwindled.

The scenes where our heroes went up against Jerry Jacks reminded me of the '80s and early '90s, when these kinds of location sequences were common on soaps, and Robert, Luke, Frisco, and Sonny were battling enemies. Sure, those of you used to watching million-dollar blockbuster movies may say the GH action scenes were a little cheesy. But I happen to like my General Hospital with a little cheese. (And some wine, too, if you must know.)

The only thing missing was a gun-slinging female. Yes, I know Alexis was there, but she was the one being rescued, so it doesn't count. Where is super-spy Anna Devane when you need her?

Dante sure is scrappy for a little guy. He head-butted that bad guy with no problem. Then, John did his action move, and Shawn did a kick and a barrel move. It was like watching Charlie's Angels, but with men. John even did a hair flip, reminiscent of Farrah Fawcett's feathered coif.

In the end, the heroes got the serum, and radiation-poisoned Jerry became fish food. But, I don't buy it. Jerry is too good to stay dead. There was no body found, and Jax's story about floating all night in the water seemed odd. So, I wouldn't be shocked if we see Jerry again sometime in the future. I just hope that the next time the team suits up that Jax or Shawn gets to wear the tights.


Is there anything better than watching the newly formed One Percenters club? From Todd and Johnny, to Sonny and Jax, to Carly and Tracy, there is so much dysfunction and humor there that entire episodes could be penned around this group. TV writers, take note. If General Hospital gets axed in the next couple years, this group would make a great primetime spinoff. Soaps are back on primetime, if you haven't noticed. I'd watch the One Percenters.

Welcome back, Kirsten Storms, to the role of Maxie. It looks like she might actually share some scenes with her mother and Mac this go-around. Yay! It was great seeing Spinelli not fall at her feet. Stay strong, Damian.

I think I found my favorite new supercouple: Monica and Tracy. Since Diane has departed Port Charles, we've been sorely lacking female friendships. Monica and Tracy have insulted one another for decades, but underneath it is genuine affection. But nobody hurls insults like these two old gals. See the Best Lines of the Week section for proof.

Did it strike anyone else as funny that Todd tried to smother Johnny while Johnny had an oxygen tube in his nose? Perhaps my earlier reference to Todd as the cerebral one was way off.

Edward Quartermaine was in the house! Edward gave the only dose of antidote to sweet Emma Drake. What a guy! I've missed seeing Edward, as he has always been one of my favorites. I'm a little nervous though. The way his hat kept popping up this week, I kept thinking we were going to get the news that Edward had succumbed to the poison. I hope we haven't seen the last of Edward.

Who do you suppose got Jason that snazzy blue robe he was wearing in the hospital, Monica or Liz? I don't imagine he had time to run home, with a bullet in his leg, and grab his overnight bag. I can't imagine Jason even has an overnight bag with a luxurious bathrobe. Maybe the nurses at GH just put a robe in a locker for him, considering how much time he's spent in the hospital. Then again, what nurse in her right mind would want to cover up Jason in a gaping hospital gown?

Rest in peace, Cook. Cook was one of the victims of Jerry's poisoned water scheme. Cook never had a name but was referenced many times in the Quartermaine household during the last three decades. I think it would be a hoot to see how many famous celebrities the show could get to do cameos for job interviews for the cook position. It might get the show some press, too.

It's not often that characters brought in with such horrible off-screen history can win over viewers. GH, you have a problem with Joe Scully Jr. Richard Steinmetz is so fantastic portraying this character that he's not a one-note bad guy. Viewers are falling for him. (See my bursting mailbag section for proof.) He's richly layered and is simply wonderful with Tracy. (And that's coming from a Luke/Tracy fan.)

Please, please, don't make him turn out to be the rapist, killer, all-around bad guy Kate and Sonny have led us to believe. He selflessly saved Tracy! This character can be salvaged if we find out that Connie had DID even back in the old days. As for the killing of John's sister, some creative writing could make that all a mistake, too. Plus, I'd like to see a true mobster besting Sonny from time to time. Johnny doesn't count, as he never really wanted to be in the business anyway.

I loved the sweet scene between Steve and Elizabeth as they both faced death. But, I was startled that Jason and Sam didn't seem to want to spend what could have been their last moments on earth together. So much for "'til death do us part."

So Kristina is back from Vegas with her new husband. Scoopers, are you enjoying this storyline? Frankly, I didn't even miss them, or Starr and Michael. And that makes me sad.

I didn't write the column last week, but I have to comment on Todd's man crush on Jax: In a word, hilarious. Todd was enamored from the first handshake, and who can blame him? Jax needs to stay in Port Charles. Show honchos, are you listening? So how long before Heather snatches baby Morgan and heads for the hills? Most of you are clamoring for an end to this baby switch drama, so let's hope it doesn't take too long.

I was cracking up that even John McBain experiences the daily frustration of automated phone systems and the idiocy of bureaucracy. As he was on the phone with the bomb squad, they put him on hold and then asked a question that ignited McBain's sarcasm. "No, I don't have a defusing kit," he said incredulously. Hysterical!

Best Lines of the Week

(Monica tries to warn Tracy about getting involved so quickly with Joe, without knowing anything about him.)
Tracy: "I don't expect you to understand. You haven't had a man since the Industrial Revolution."

(Jax and Jerry argue about Jerry's crazy scheme to poison the entire town.)
Todd: "Jax, I feel for you, man. It sucks when you find out that your brother is a card-carrying psychopath. You should tear a page from my book and just shoot the guy."
Jerry: "I knew I liked you."

(Sonny tells the other "one percenters" that they cannot trust Jerry.)
Jerry: "It's true. If Jax wasn't involved, I probably would have left you all to die. You're not important to me. You're all varying degrees of tedious, unpleasant, and annoying."
Todd: "Don't do that. Don't lump me in with all of them. "

(Jax tells Jerry that there is no way his plan to kidnap Alexis and keep her with him will work.)
Jerry: "Well, I have high hopes for us, once the Stockholm Syndrome sets in."

(Cops Dante and John try to defuse Jerry's bomb.)
Dante: "So, what do you know about defusing bombs?"
John: "I could use a refresher course at the college."
Dante: "So, what do we do now?"
John: "How do you feel about praying?"

Reader Spotlight

Last time, I asked you to give me your thoughts on the budding Shawn and Alexis romance. If my mailbag is any indication, this couple hasn't caught on with fans yet. I got more mail about Joe Jr. than Shawn and Alexis.

This week, I'd like your opinion on the new pace and changes to the show. Do you feel like the show is clicking again? Do you want Jax back permanently, or are there already too many characters on the show? What or who isn't working for you? Share your thoughts with me, and you may see them shared below in my next column. Thanks!

  • (I am) so bummed about Steve Burton. I do disagree with you on a few things. I love the face scruff! And although I am not loving the Trey character, I am liking NuKristina. Starr is okay. Maybe, it's that I'm getting a little older (44), but right now, to me Joe Jr. is the hottie on the show. Love that guy! --- Christine

  • Hi Jennifer, you are right, I didn't see Duke coming either, what a wonderful surprise. I can barely wait to get home from work to watch. I'm glad Jax is back and hope he stays. I'm also hopeful for Tracy and Joe Jr. Richard is an awesome actor. --- Sue

  • I really like Shawn with Alexis. Alexis has such a biting retort to most things (which I happen to love) and she needs someone like this solid man. I'm so sorry that Steve Burton is leaving, as he is my favorite of all time on that show. Makes me want to leave, too. --- Linda
  • Shawn and Alexis -- no way. I don't know what it is about Starr, but I kind of like her. And bring on Erica Slezak as a long lost sibling of Monica's. --- David

  • Have to admit I never saw the Duke Lavery twist coming either. Granted, I wasn't watching back then but thanks to the Internet I knew all about him. As much as I wish Robin had stayed dead, I can't wait to see where this goes. My heart is broken though at just the thought of losing Burton. Jason and Carly are why I started watching 15 years ago, and it just won't be the same without him. I do hope though that they'll reunite Jax and Carly, now that our knight-in-shining armor has returned!! I've also surprisingly enjoyed Jason and John working together. And I'm glad we've seen a redeemable side to Joe Jr. All-in-all, GH has been superb these last two weeks, and I really hope the trend continue! --- Lyndsey Turner

  • I'm truly sorry to see Steve Burton leaving. I've been a fan since "Out of This World." He and his baby blues will be missed. I think Alexis and Shawn are a good match. Jerry is too much the bad guy, and Alexis too prim and ethical. Jerry is really one of the best villains on TV. Apparently Mac is taken, by an absentee Felicia. All that aside, the show is definitely back on track. --- Rita

  • I have to say I love, love, love Todd Manning on GH. I always loved him on OLTL, but he's great on GH. A day without Todd makes me sad. He's hot and funny. Speaking of hot, Jax is hot! Good gracious. I know his time here is limited but why?!?! The man is amazing. I am going to miss Steve Burton. There is no other character like Jason. Please GH stop dragging the Sam/baby and Robin thing out! Enough already. A bunch of random thoughts, but I love the Two Scoops column! Thanks --- Erika

  • Jennifer, I love GH lately too! Like you said, I can't wait to see what happens next! It's been a while since I have felt this way about GH! There have been so many surprises, and I hope they keep coming! Maybe Ric Lansing or A.J. Quartermaine will re-surface. They have both been mentioned in the last couple week, which on a soap is usually a foreshadowing of things to come. We could really use the return of a Quartermaine, especially now that Jason will not be around, whom by the way, is my favorite character of all time. Love your column. --- Desmond

  • Best Line of the Week, er Year, Award goes to Todd Manning to Sonny Corinthos in the Quartermaine living room, "You know where Jimmy Hoffa is buried, don't you?" --- Sandy in NJ

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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