He's leavin' on that midnight train to... Portland

For the Week of December 16, 2013
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He's leavin' on that midnight train to... Portland
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Who will hack into all the Port Charles computers now that Spinelli is leaving Port Charles? Join Tamilu for this week's GH Two Scoops as we imagine a world -- or at least a town -- without Damian.

Dear Readers, Spinelli (a.k.a. Bradford Anderson) is leaving General Hospital, and I don't like it. Sure, he probably wants to spread his wings and try new things and audition for movies and musicals and pilots and whatnot, but I am selfish and want him to stay put.

One thing I know for sure: he will never play a character as interesting and rich and layered as Damien Spinelli. The worst of this is that we have waited forever for Maxie and Spinelli to reunite -- first through Kirsten Storms's illness and then through this eternal baby-swapping story, and now that Spinelli knows they have a child together, and we could savor and wallow in a sweet reunion -- he's leaving, and it makes me feel cheated. I hate waiting for happy endings that never actually materialize.

I want the payoff -- Spixie reunited, but that is not to be. Bradofrd Anderson is leaving the show, and Kirsten Storms will be on maternity leave soon. So, maybe when Maxie comes back to Port Charles, her old pal (and real life hubby) Johnnie Zacharra can get out of jail early, and she can end up with him. At least at the end of Friday's show, it looked as though Spinelli was going to let her say goodbye to her daughter. (Whose name should be Georgie.)

All that having been said, I have loved watching Damien Spinelli brought to life by his brilliant portrayer, Bradford Anderson, and I'm truly sad to see him leave.

Moving along... Readers, is it just me, or is it totally mental that "Franco" killed Heather and that we saw him stab her, load her into a laundry hamper (while Carly took the world's longest shower), wheel her down the hall of the emptiest hotel hallway ever and into the parking garage to stuff her in the trunk after a brief run-in with Lucy Coe, drive her across town, dump her into a grave, bury her then pat down the earth with his shovel, and she is still not dead. I love you, GH, but I can only suspend my disbelief so far.

It's kind of lonely in Port Charles without any über villains -- no Obrecht, Faison, Jerry Jacks, or Heather only leaves us with Julian and Carlos, who are Sonny-like villains -- really hot criminals that we acknowledge are bad but still really want to see shirtless. And I guess you could call Britt a villain, but right now, she's just passing off Dante and Lulu's baby as her own and not trying to hold anyone hostage, so she hasn't lived up to her parents' bad reputations -- yet...

Point of discussion: I understand that GH had no choice but to stop using Todd, Starr, and McBain when OLTL was held hostage in some lawsuit between ABC and Prospect Park. But since OLTL is finally kaput now, and PP isn't planning to resurrect it, can we just revert back to Franco being Todd and Silas being McBain? I will pretend the last six months were a dream if I can have Todd Manning back. Swear.

But, for now, he's Franco, his brain tumor removal hasn't cured him, and he's still the sort of guy that stabs his mom in the gut, justified or not.

A.J. is out on the streets again after he thinks he committed murder and didn't, and he immediately went to hitting the sauce. I wish GH would employ a trick from The Young and the Restless and have A.J.'s dad, Ghost-Alan, visit and give him a pep talk like John Abbott always does for Jack in Jack's darkest moments.

I doubt Liz will notice A.J. is out and drinking because she's too busy worrying about Britt and Nick. I had a few people email me mean letters because I tweeted something about Nick dumping Britt -- but c'mon readers, be honest. Do you think that once Nikolas finds out that Britt's baby really belongs to his sister Lulu, who was brokenhearted over losing her child, that he will just shrug it off and forgive her? Perhaps eventually, but not right away.

And now, let's get down to it... Patrick, Robin, and Sabrina. Readers, I have a confession -- Robin has never been my favorite character. In fact, I was pretty much over her right after Stone died and have never jumped back on her bandwagon. She's bossy and condescending and possesses many traits that make me avoid people. If I lived in Port Charles, I would never make friends with Robin.

But I was rooting for her to escape and to get home to her family. I got sucked back into thinking she could be less annoying this time around and that morally, I should root for Emma to get her real Mommy back. In truth, Emmy running to Robin and jumping into her arms might be the most touching scene of 2013. But I digress.

Robin got home and wasn't back in Patrick's orbit for 20 minutes before she started sniping at him again, and I thought, "I bet Patrick wishes she had stayed dead."

On Monday, Robin went to Sabrina and asked her to walk away from Patrick so he could go back to his marriage to Robin. That's probably what will happen, but if I was Patrick and I had to choose between bossy Robin and sweet Sabrina, I'd pick Sabrina even though Robin had him first.

Imagine if Patrick had met Robin and Sabrina at the same time. Would he still have chosen Robin? Maybe, but I'm not sure. And now, two years has passed, he has moved on with his life and fallen for someone else, and I have to wonder how easy it will be to go back to the troubled relationship he had with Robin that was full of fighting and stress and walk away from the fresh, new, sweet love he found with Sabrina. The moral part of me wants Patrick to pick robin, because that is the right choice, the decent choice. But another part of me thinks he is happier with Sabrina and wants him to make the selfish choice. I can never reconcile my moral side with my selfish side.

Sabrina has two choices, too -- Carlos, potentially Lily's illegitimate brother and gangster sidekick, or Patrick, who is legally single. Who will he choose?

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Tracy serve A.J. tainted Pickle-Lila relish to get him out of the house again? Will Molly pick Rafe or T.J.? Will Lucy blab herself into confessing that she cheated on Doc with Scott? Will Spencer get over the fact that his Uncle Sonny, who has never even acknowledged he existed before, bought him a Christmas gift?

Will Sean Donnelly come to Port Charles to thank Luke for the antidote? Will anyone find the DVDs Ava tried to torch and blackmail her with them? Will anyone in Port Charles actually buy someone a Christmas gift instead of re-gifting Heather's hideous sandwich paintings? Will Luke and Spanky Buns split that champagne and just not tell the people who think Luke is a drunk?

Be sure to check back next week for part one of our year-in-review special: The Best and Worst of GH 2013.

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.


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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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