When smoke gets in your eyes

For the Week of May 19, 2014
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GH Two Scoops: When smoke gets in your eyes
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Another Nurses Ball is in the history books. There was singing, dancing, drama, surprises, tears, love triangles, and the typical Port Charles mayhem. What was your favorite moment? Can you wait another year for the next one? Let's discuss in this week's Two Scoops.

Readers, I live in San Diego, and if you saw the news, you will know that we had horrific fires here this week. Homes were destroyed, families displaced, thousands without power -- it was a hard week to watch TV in San Diego.

Due to the fires, every show, all day, was fire coverage -- what parts of town were being evacuated, which highways were shut down, which schools were closed, and other pertinent details. This means that I didn't get to see General Hospital on my DVR all week and instead had to sit down Friday night and watch them all online, which was painful, as you have to sit through commercials.

Considering all the hardships my fellow San Diegans faced this week, I am thankful that my worst problem in all this is that I missed my soaps. I just want you to know I would have chalked up this week of GH to a loss if not for you.

But, because you were expecting a column and I adore you, I sat through the Yoplait commercial at least two dozen times, and I wanted to swear off Yoplait altogether, but since their generous sponsorship allowed us to have the magnificent Nurses' Ball, I'm going to go and buy a whole case.

After last year's ball, I couldn't imagine them topping themselves, but the Nurses' Ball did not disappoint. We got to enjoy the hidden skills of our multi-talented GH cast -- singing, dancing, stripping, and, in Lucy's case, ending up onstage in her skivvies in utter humiliation.

It must be a great week for the actors, too -- to stop being Molly, Obrecht, Brad, and Ned and to be able to shine in their own wonderful gifts and creativity.

At the moment the opening was interrupted by Obrecht singing Willkommen, I was hooked. Kathleen Gati can really sing, but she had to sing as Obrecht with that accent, which made it hilarious. She was downright giddy about performing, jumping up and down with glee at the end of her show-stopping number, and seemed completely oblivious to the fact that no one clapped. I laughed and squealed through her whole number, a delightfully nutty performance from our resident psychopath hospital chief of staff. And who knew Obrecht is the one who is keeping GH open?! She's super crazy and apparently loaded.

I was dismayed when Maxie's annoying boyfriend, Levi, convinced her not to go to the ball. I know Maxie wants to be a better person, but ladies, here's some free advice from Auntie Tamilu -- if you're dating a guy who won't let you be you, run for the hills. If his every waking effort is trying to make you into someone else, to keep you from your friends and the things you enjoy, that is not love. When he finally succumbed and agreed to attend, I was glad. I hoped Maxie would dump Levi as soon as she saw Nathan suited up. Yowza.

So many great moments -- I loved Player singing "Baby Come Back," even thought the premise of Spencer booking the band to woo back Emma from Cameron was a bit far-fetched. Their tango was adorable for as long as it lasted.

On the down side, I guess this means Ronn Moss isn't coming to GH as a character -- he was just playing himself in Player. Readers, I'm pretty good on GH trivia with 36 years of viewing under my belt, but when Ronn told Spencer to "Say hello to Grandma Lesley" -- I don't know of a connection between Ronn and Denise Alexander -- is there one? It's not often the Soap Diva needs schooling, but this time, I do.

I know it's mean, but I am glad Mr. Marbles died at Epiphany's hand, although I felt sorry for Mac. Ventriloquist dummies creep me out; I honestly can't bear to even look at them. Apparently, I have some bad puppet memory from childhood I have suppressed because as soon as I see dummies on TV, I fast-forward my fingers off.

The Magic Milo number was as enjoyable as expected, and the twist this year was that it prompted Brad, who was watching at home with Britt over a pint of ice cream, to get up, get dressed, and go to the ball after noticing Lucas and Felix together.

In a terribly creepy rendition of "I Am What I Am", Fluke's evil underbelly was highly visible, and only Tracy, with stars in her eyes, didn't notice. I have to say I didn't see the ELQ coup coming -- Michael being made CEO, Tracy being ousted -- but why would the board appoint Michael rather than Ned? I'm hoping Ned might stick around and run ELQ with Michael and have the two of them bond. Michael can finally have a successful Quartermaine mentor him in the family business.

The ball had several very poignant moments -- "Adele Dezeem" (a.k.a. Obrecht) singing "You Were Always on My Mind" was so touching, and my eyes teared up for her, even knowing she's a nut case, and that can only be attributed to Kathleen Gati's enormous talent. I wonder if Obrecht is her favorite character she's ever played? It has to be. I loved that at the end, the sad little family threesome of Obrecht, Britt, and Nathan left the ball together to share a ride. Maybe it's the beginning of a nice family dynamic in spite of all their respective flaws. (Except Nathan doesn't seem to have any flaws. :)

Another sad moment was when Lucy ended up on stage half-clothed, locked in a kiss with Scottie, in front of her husband and the whole town. We knew that she would get caught eventually, but we just didn't know it would be so completely publically. My heart broke for Kevin having to witness that in front of all his friends, and Lucy still lying, trying to come up with some feasible reason why it was happening. Ugh, heartbreaking.

And that beautiful haunting song -- "You Are Not Alone" -- started powerfully by the incredible ddy, our Epiphany, and then joined by Patrick and Sabrina from the hospital as they watched over their teeny, tiny son. What should they name him? Noah hasn't been a great dad to Patrick, and we don't know anything about Sabrina's father -- so it's up for grabs, I guess. Probably not Matt, because Patrick never visits his brother in prison.

I seriously love Ron Carlivati and the GH writing team because it's clear they love GH the same way I do. Thanks for a great ball!

Readers, Tony Geary must have become completely bored with Luke. There is no other reason I can see that a show would take one of its most beloved actors, and turn them into a despicable character for so freaking long. I despise Fluke. I want this to be over. I was sure that as soon as May Sweeps hit, we would get our big reveal, but here we are on May 17 and still don't know. Please, by month's end, let us know who this poser is and give us back Lucas Lorenzo Spencer, the unreliable rascal we adore.

My husband, who pretends he doesn't watch GH, has now settled on his bet -- he thinks Fluke is Victor Jerome, and that's why Julian is having such a hard time breaking away from him, because it's his long-supposed-dead daddy. I'm still leaning towards Anthony Zachara, but when Anthony was married to Tracy, he actually kind of dug her, and Fluke has to fantasize about Kiki to make love to Tracy, so my guess is probably wrong. Others have said Bill Eckert, but that doesn't make sense to me either, Bill wasn't a mob kingpin rich enough to bankroll the Jerome crime family -- so I'm still stumped. But please, please, make it stop. If he shoots Alexis, I will lose my mind. On the upside, if he does, at least Alexis has several exes in town all at once to sit by her bedside, crying. Ned, Ric, Sonny, Sean, and Julian can all take turns.

After the ball ended, life went on in Port Charles. Some went back to the hospital to be by Patrick and Sabrina's side -- when Emma put her little hand in Patrick's and they did a close up of her precious sad eyes, I melted. The kids on GH right now are so precious.

Lulu and Dante got the good news that the embryo is truly theirs, and Lulu is contemplating trying to carry the baby. Readers, I will tell you right now if she is implanted with this embryo and miscarries, I will march up to Los Angeles (or drive up in my responsible hybrid car) and protest. Please, let Rocco have a healthy little sister named Laura. And while Lulu would never let Maxie carry another baby for her, I would love to see their friendship get back to the place where Maxie could support Lulu through this pregnancy. It would be such good karma. But hopefully, Levi will go back to where he came from, leave Maxie with Nathan, and no one will care about karma anymore.

Readers, do you recall when I hated Britt? I really, really hated her, and I could not imagine a time when I would be rooting for her. But now? I am decidedly rooting for her. I want Nik to forgive her, and I want her to have a second chance. She needs a son, Spencer needs a mommy, and Nik and Britt both come from lunatic families and understand each other. I know she did evil and despicable things, but she truly has evolved into a better person. I am a big believer in redemption and second chances.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Julian quitting the mob be the end of Alexis? Will Sean warn Jordan about the drug bust? Will Sonny ever be able to trust anyone again until Robin reanimates Jason? Will Carly and Franco solve the mystery of A.J.'s phone, or will the recording be gone once Carly turns the phone back on after the flight? Will Tracy really believe that JJ stands for Jasper Jacks when Luke has never had a conversation with him before in his life? Will the writers (please) invent more reasons for William deVry to walk around in his briefs? Will Michael revive Pickle-Lila or Pickle-Eddy now that he is CEO? Will anyone ask Olivia why she didn't have a psychic vision about Sonny having graveyard sex before he did Ava in the crypt?

What are your thoughts on General Hospital? Share your thoughts on the show or this week's column with us. Leave your comments in the Comments area further down the page. If you prefer, you can click here to send our columnist a note by Feedback. You can also call our 24/7 caller feedback hotline at 267.341.7627 and voice your thoughts.

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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