She shot a man (not in Reno) just to watch him die

For the Week of May 25, 2015
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GH Two Scoops: She shot a man just to watch him die
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Hauntings by mob ghosts, accidentally incinerated babies, doppelgangers in black wigs with Jersey accents... what on earth is going on in Port Charles? We'll discuss it in this week's GH Two Scoops. It's not live, but it's the next best thing.

Anna knew Carlos would get away with killing Duke, and she couldn't have that, so she put four bullets into his chest. I know that not because I counted but because Ghost Carlos taunted her with the number.

I'm glad that killing a man in cold blood is haunting Anna. I love soap villains, but I also like having some decent, honest, good people who make the right choices over and over again even when it's hard. We don't have many of those on the landscape. Nathan is good, but he let Maxie slide for helping Johnny escape. Dante is good, but he often looks the other way when Michael or Sonny or someone he loves is in the wrong. I can understand turning your head. But for Anna to shoot a man dead on the docks -- that should haunt her and continue to haunt her for the rest of time. I know the "why" of her actions, she knew he would get off and not pay for killing Duke, and her heart couldn't bear that -- but even so, she was in the wrong and ultimately killed the only witness against Julian.

I'm sad that Carlos had to die. Although he was a shady criminal, he was a compelling character. Jeffrey Vincent Parise has done an amazing job both as a live mobster and as a taunting ghost this week. Not to mention he's my type -- scruffy and a little on the wild side, like Sawyer on Lost.

But I digress. He will be missed. His soft spot for Sabrina humanized him and made him slightly sympathetic. But, this is Port Charles, where mobsters go to die. He joins the ranks of Luis Alcazar, Anthony Zacharra, the Balkan, Frank Smith, Faith Rosco, Joe Scully, Manny Ruiz, Mr. Big, and a plethora of other random mobsters and the collateral damage known as the "Five Families." May he rest in peace. (For fun, name some more dead GH mobsters and tweet them to me or message me on Soap Central! Let's see how many we can add!)

One mobster dies, and another comes back to life? I never believed that Ava was dead, and a woman looking suspiciously like Ava in a bad wig showed up at Julian's door at the end of Friday's episode. Was it her? Or is Maura West coming back as some Ava doppelgänger, long-lost cousin, evil twin, victim of DID sort of creature? I guess we won't know until Monday, but I'd love to hear your guess! If it's Ava, how on earth will she get out of the many criminal charges pending against her? If it's not her -- how will you feel about that? Cheated or delighted?

Julian says he is getting out of the mob, and I really believe he means it, but will the world around him allow him to change? As Julian stated, one doesn't just quit the mob like you quit a job at the bank. It will take a lot of unraveling and probably gunfire. I doubt that Anna will let him bow out because she knows that ultimately Julian is the one who ordered the hit on Duke. Duke was no saint; he ordered a hit on Jordan, and for Anna to pretend that Duke was innocent is ridiculous.

Jordan has been unmasked as an undercover agent but didn't get the hero's parade she hoped she would get from her son T.J. He is angry on Shawn's behalf. He isn't privy to the info yet that Shawn is his father, although all of us suspected that way, way back when the discussion of Jordan and Shawn's affair came up.

Now, Shawn knows he is T.J.'s dad but faces life in prison for shooting Hayden in the head. Of course, we know the shooter was a flunky sent by Nikolas Cassadine! I have to say, that one shocked me. I know Nikolas has been dabbling with his toes in the twisted Cassadine side of his gene pool, but to full-out order a hit on someone just to keep her quiet? That's Helena's dream come true. I just never thought Nik would go that far down the path to the dark side.

However, when I consider his life, his loss, his heartache, and how doing the right thing all the time has left him still alone, lied to by Britt, rejected by Liz, and widowed by Emily and Courtney -- I can see where he'd throw his hands up in the air and say, "Screw love, I might as well go for power and money." Even so, it breaks my heart because he's always been a White Hat in a town full of Black Hats. Call me a fool, but I still want to believe in good guys.

Ric's hat has changed colors over the years and now is a steady shade of gray. He's not a mobster, but he defends mobsters. He lied to Jake about being married to win Liz, but his hands aren't bloody. He's a great dad to Molly, but slightly shady. One has to wonder what he's up to with Nina. My guess is that he knows some way to unlock her vast fortune that hinged on her being married.

As much as I love Nina and Franco together, I can see where Ric and Nina being together is going to be a lot of loopy fun. Michelle Stafford is my favorite comic relief on GH. When she walks on screen, my heart gets happy because I know I'm in for a treat. The rest of Port Charles is death and jail and pretend dead babies. And Nina is Egg Salad paintings and impromptu weddings and all-around zaniness. I just adore that woman. I pity Y&R for losing her and rejoice with GH for landing her. She makes any show instantly better.

Ric and Nina haven't consummated their marriage yet as he had to rush off immediately after the ceremony, so maybe Franco can persuade her to annul the marriage before it's "official." But I think the writers will do us an injustice if we don't get to land here for a little while -- it's just too much fun not to explore.

As to the lady who inspired a lot this mayhem? Liz has lost my support and sympathy.

In my last column, I defended her as a woman in love who was taking her one shot at happiness. But I assumed that after a night of passion and finally having the man she loved in her bed, she would feel guilty about keeping him from his wife and kid and burst into a confession. I was wrong.

At multiple times this week, I thought Liz was going to tell him. I saw the guilt well up inside of her, and yet -- nothing. Not a peep. Although I understand full well how much she loves "Jakeson," I can't defend her anymore because her original reasons included keeping him safe from the mob. Now, Sonny has a hit out on his best friend, and all Liz would have to do to stop that and save his life is tell the damned truth, and she has remained silent. Sam could have died, too -- and Liz still remained silent. Hayden took a bullet to the head, and still Liz said nothing. So, sorry Liz, I can't defend you this week.

As for Hayden, while I am very sorry she got shot and is now in a coma, all the time she kept saying to Jake, "I know who you really are, just listen to me!" I was yelling at my TV -- "Say his name! Say his name! JUST SAY HIS NAME!" But no, she lollygagged around until she got shot in the head and didn't get to say the name.

What irks me about this is how stupid everyone has become. Sam is a P.I. for a living. Her husband died, and the body was never found. Jake knew about her wedding rings and had flashes of memories that involved her. Hayden said to Sam verbally "This concerns you, too." Spinelli took one look at Jake and called him "Stone Cold." We know the person playing "pre-plastic surgery Jake" was an actor. Helena was involved. How many more clues do you need, Sam? He's your husband! I'm so out of patience with this.

I admit patience isn't my strong suit to begin with, so there's that, and I haven't reached the 'Fluke' level of impatience yet, but I'm close. Let Liz be pregnant with Jake's baby. Let Jason be Jason and go back to Sam and Danny. Let Liz and Patrick lick their wounds and end up together like Robin wanted a long time ago. Give me a few happy endings. And then you can jack it all up again, but please, allow me a breather. Just like in real life.

In real life, Kyle would have busted Anna for murdering a man in cold blood, but he's got a little crush on her, so he helped her get rid of a body and scrub up blood and cover up a murder. Do you know anyone in your life that would help you dispose of a body? I don't think I do. I can't imagine anyone I know offering such a thing. And of course, I've never touched a gun in my life, so it's not a real possibility anyway. Ha.

But now, Anna pretty much is Sloan's *itch -- for the rest of time, he can blackmail her with that piece of info anytime she doesn't do what he wants her to do.

Friends, if I had a baby and the hospital "accidentally cremated it," I would not take that in stride and say, "Oh well," and move on. I would take that hospital down! I would go on GMA and weep and beg America to demand the hospital pay for destroying my baby. The fact that Julian is taking this so calmly really strikes me as wrong. A man who always wants revenge on his enemies is going to just sit home and mope when someone "accidentally" incinerated his baby? Puh-lease.

We like to think of Olivia as one of the "good guys" in Port Charles, but now she has lied to the fathers of both of her children about their paternity. You'd think if she were so offended by the idea of people living lives of crime, she would stop sleeping with mobsters!

Of course, I realize this is a vehicle for Lisa LoCicero to have maternity leave -- she and Ned will quietly ride off into the sunset with the baby for a few months and then something will make her come back to town and confess. What disease do you think the baby will have that only Julian's magic DNA can cure?

Will Carly blurt out that Jake's working undercover because blurting things out is her thing? Will Morgan and NuKiki have some more awkward love scenes? (Heaven help me, I still have not warmed up to that girl.) Will Ava be Ava or Mava? Will Ghost Carlos taunt Anna into Shadybrook? (It's been months since we've seen Heather.) Will Tracy or Bobbie get to be in any scenes before Luke comes back? (Why do they both vanish every time Luke leaves town?) Will Britt be Brad's "Best Person" at his upcoming nuptials to Lucas? Will Madeline ever get her makeup trial and get back to town to torment Nina and Nathan? (Or is she too busy trying to tame the shrews on Queens of Drama?) Will Michael and Sabrina realize baby A.J. hasn't been seen in weeks? (Since Michael started dating the nanny, she hasn't been very diligent about her job.)

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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