Apocalypse now

For the Week of May 15, 2017
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GH Two Scoops: Apocalypse now
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Sweeps kicked into high gear with doppelgängers, betrayals, nefarious plots, and a deadly birthday gift that could spell doom for all. Will unlikely heroes emerge to save the day, or will the usual suspects continue to reign supreme?

I have a confession to make -- I fully support Carly's quest to hold on tight to everything Sonny signed over to her.

I know Carly is in the wrong. She's being petty and vindictive, and she'll inevitably hand everything back over to Sonny. I recognize that her choices are hypocritical because she married Sonny, knowing exactly what she was getting into. I also fully concede that Jax is far from a victim -- he's a billionaire adventurer who hasn't spent much time in Port Charles since 2011. Plus, she went from Sonny's house straight into Jax's arms, so she's far from innocent.

However, none of that matters to me because I want Sonny to pay for something. Anything. I'm sick and tired of him always being absolved, forgiven, or redeemed then going along his merry way without skipping a beat. It's frustrating.

Don't get me wrong, I don't expect Sonny to be a saint, but if he's going to do bad things, then there should be some consequences.

I tend to have more empathy -- and forgiveness -- for someone like Julian because he's not made of Teflon. Julian is a lot like Sonny in that he's drawn to crime like a moth to a bright flame, but unlike Sonny, Julian always pays a steep price for his poor choices. More importantly, Julian makes periodic attempts to turn things around and clean up his act, whereas Sonny has never even considered it.

Unfortunately for Julian, fate likes to conspire against him.

The few times Sonny took a step back from the mob were out of necessity, not choice.

I've seen Sonny coldly execute his enemies, ruin innocent lives, and exploit, corrupt, and endanger the people he claims to love the most. Year after year, I've watched Sonny make one selfish decision after another until decades have passed. Yet, for reasons I can't begin to fathom, people like Olivia sing his praises and talk about him as if he were Robin Hood.

He's not. Robin Hood lived in the woods with his men, not in a castle. That was Prince John, and the Sheriff of Nottingham -- the bad guys.

I want Carly to hit Sonny where it hurts and make him pay. Literally. I want Ava to take him to court and get custody of Avery. I want Sonny to be exiled, Napoleon-style, to his little island in Puerto Ricco for a good long while.

It's not like Sonny will suffer any more than Jax will. He'll just cool his jets in the lap of luxury and spend his days in gambling, seducing beautiful women, frolicking in the water, and entertaining on his yacht until Carly gets tired of punishing him.

I abhor Sonny and would probably root for Amy if she knocked him down a peg or two.

Actually, that's not true. Nothing could sway me to root for Amy, especially after that Fatal Attraction scene outside Nathan and Maxie's apartment when she tore the struggling newlyweds' picture in two and kept the half with Nathan's handsome mug smiling into the camera lens.

Mark my words, no good will come of that.

There was plenty of heartache to go around this week. Nathan was hurt that Maxie extended her stay in Portland without talking to him first then she turned down Nina's job offer, claiming that she might never return to Port Charles, which is news to Nathan. Meanwhile, Jordan is conflicted because she felt a pang of jealously when she thought Andre had moved on with Valerie. Finally, there was Nina, who discovered that happily ever after on Spoon Island lasted just a few scant months.

I applauded Nina for asking the tough question -- did Valentin want to have an affair with Anna. He hesitated, and that told her everything. I was doubly impressed when Nina stood firm and refused to be swayed by all his heartfelt declarations and promises. It's not easy to walk away from the one you love, but Nina did it because she refuses to get sucked back into the vortex of insanity she struggled with during her marriage to Silas Clay. Brava, Nina!

I might disagree with Nina about Charlotte and Lulu, but I can appreciate that she is continually evolving and making a genuine effort to make better choices. That can't be said for many in Port Charles.

This week, we had a little surprise when Friday's show ended with a woman who looks exactly like Anna waking up in a London hospital.

My guess is that the woman languishing in London is Anna, and the woman in Port Charles is not Anna.

There have been some not-so-subtle clues that all is not as it seems with Ms. Devane, starting with the curt way she's been treating her friends and loved ones. She's been as jumpy as a cat on a hot tin roof and a tad bit short with everyone. Additionally, she seemed perfectly healthy despite her lackadaisical attitude toward the life-saving phlebotomy appointments. Finally, she didn't recognize Nathan the other day. I don't care how many medications Anna is taking; she would recognize Nathan.

However, Anna's twin sister, Alex, might not.

Regardless, Valentin found the bug, and he's on the prowl for a little payback. Whatever game NotAnna is playing, Valentin is about to up the stakes.

In other news, Jason and Franco hopped in a boat and rowed over to Cassadine Island. Sadly, I don't think they stocked the cooler Franco gushed about with ouzo or beer because Jason was wound tight when they located the rather unassuming and not-the-least-bit-scary scarecrow Jake had sketched on the timeline.

It turns out that a rock wall played the biggest role in the story of the dark and dreary night Helena decided to have Jason punished for failing to make it to a secret rendezvous point after carrying out a deadly mission. Helena had ordered her guard to shackle Jason to a rock wall and viciously beat Jason until he learned his lesson. Jake had had the misfortune of witnessing the brutal attack. Why that made Jake afraid of Jason is unclear, but it certainly traumatized the little boy.

It's an interesting story to be sure -- except it doesn't quite jive with what we saw unfold.

Jason was shot and tossed into the water, where it was presumed he had perished. The next time we saw him, he was on ice at the Crichton-Clark clinic, and Robin was being held captive and forced to bring him back to life. She eventually succeeded, and Jason made his way back to Port Charles, where he was promptly run over by Ava.

So, when exactly did Jason become Helena's secret assassin? And how did he end up in one of her freezer pods?

I guess it doesn't matter because poor little Jake has his hands on a big old can of disaster delivered by one of Helena's minions dressed as a delivery driver.

Would a minion work for a dead woman? I don't think so. It would not surprise me in the least if we learn that Helena's death has been part of an elaborate ruse to keep everyone from figuring out what she was up to until it was too late.

It turns out, the chimera Jake drew referenced the Chimera Project. The Chimera Project was revealed to be a delightful little doomsday virus that Valentin decided should be in the hands of an arch villain like Helena.

Oh, those crazy Cassadines. There's never a dull moment when one of them is around.

Now, it's a race to see who will figure out that Jake has the chimera in his magic kit.

My hope is that Franco will play a key role in averting disaster. If Sonny can be redeemed by saving a ship of fools from a bomb that Jason planted, then Franco can get a second chance by helping to thwart Helena's apocalypse.

Finally, it looks like Finn and Hayden will soon be hearing the pitter-patter of little feet. I have to say, it was refreshing to see a surprise pregnancy without a bunch of crazy drama. Sure, Finn is still very early into his recovery, and he and Hayden have only been dating for a short time, but I like them together. They really do bring out the best in each other.

I'm looking forward to Finn and Hayden starting a life together and getting ready for a baby. They are a cute couple, and despite their rocky start, I think they have what it takes to go the distance -- provided they can figure out who is trying to sabotage Finn.

The obvious suspect is Brad. He's in charge of the lab, and he's furious that Finn didn't give him proper recognition and money for his role in developing a cure for Blackwood's syndrome. Plus, Brad seemed way too confident that Finn would be fired for failing his drug test.

However, Liesl Obrecht has an axe to grind too. She loathes Finn and wouldn't hesitate to stoop to tampering with a drug test to get him fired.

There's also a possibility that it was Amy. She's judgmental, opinionated, and not exactly a fan of Finn's. I seem to recall her having some very strong opinions about addiction.

Random observations
I'm confused. I had the distinct impression that Amy and Kristina were old school friends, yet Amy clearly went to school with Dillon and Maxie, which means she's significantly older than Kristina.

How does Pozzulo's stay in business when I never see a customer in that place? Ever.

I really wish Nelle would try to seek forgiveness without the waterworks. It comes off as manipulative rather than sincere.

Reader feedback
I found Friday [May 28]'s episode to be completely unworthy of Jane Elliot's talent and dedication not only to GH but to daytime as a whole. The clips of old episodes were a stark contrast to what GH is like today and the dream courtroom scenario was a lazy cliché. JE's reactions were, as usual, on point, Diane provided some chuckles and Ryan Paevey did a solid job. Those are all the actors I can congratulate from those soft-focus-to-the-point-of-blurry scenes. -- redboy70

It's always fun when the writers, producer, and director break out of their usual mold, and get creative for a one-shot, special occasion like Friday's episode. This was NOT the typical "clip show," the kind of flashback heavy episode that primetime series often resort to when they fall behind their production schedule, and need something quick and easy to fill their time slot. This wasn't that. -- Scrimmage

I grow so tired of people (no offense Ms. Masters) calling S&C's dysfunction...love. It's not, it's sick. -- A Lannister pays his debts

Thank you for taking the time to read my thoughts about the show. I love hearing from readers, so please feel free to email me or leave a comment below.

Until next time, take care.
Liz Masters

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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