Oh, it's a hot one...

For the Week of September 24, 2018
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Babies with rare heart conditions, teens with brain tumors, bodies found under bars, busted radiators, and not one soul can keep a secret. It's another tumultuous week in Port Charles. Let's discuss in this week's Two Scoops.

Like several inches from the midday sun, dear readers, Kiki and Griffin were forced to sweat together and rub ice cubes on themselves. Kiki advised Griffin to move into her building but neglected to tell him it was the approximate temperature of Hell inside. It's interesting that Nina, Franco, and other previous residents of that exact apartment never seemed to have problems with the radiator, but hey, things change, I guess.

As soon as Griffin walked into Kiki's place and the scene cut across town to Ava talking to Julian and starting to soften toward Kiki, we all knew she would show up while Griffin was there, right? I am glad Julian called Ava out on her hypocrisy because every time Ava starts whining about Kiki betraying her with Griffin, I scream Morgan's name at my TV.

The most disappointing thing this week is Ava stripping Griffin of the ability to practice his faith by ratting him out to the priest so he can no longer receive sacraments. She's just so vindictive and cruel. She has done so many terrible things and wants absolution but never offers it to anyone she feels has wronged her.

When Ava is hurt, she does not whimper alone; she strikes out and hurts back. She is combative and mean-spirited, and even so, there are moments when I feel great compassion for her due to the acting stylings of Maura West, who portrays this broken woman with such compassion and depth.

But seriously, readers -- I'm at my wit's end. Can we have a little happiness somewhere in Port Charles? Let Ava date Scotty, and they can scheme and connive together. Let Kiki and Griffin be together and become the moral center of a town that desperately needs one. Let Julian and Alexis reunite and make peace with each other's dark sides. Let Valentin find Nina's daughter and become her hero again, and give the (missing-in-action) Charlotte a big sister. Let Kim and Drew come together to see Oscar through his cancer and help him live the best life he can until he can't. Let Jason and Sam finally reunite after a *way* too long separation. Let Laura come home, be the one to realize Ryan is not her husband, and send him back to the loony bin.

Right now, you're saying, "You said that last time." Yeah, I did. And I might say it next time, too. There is very little happiness, love, or romance in Port Charles right now. The world is depressing enough, and my escapism of choice, soaps, isn't helping me have happy daydreams! We had one happy couple -- the lovely innocent teens Josslyn and Oscar -- but now they've decided to give Oscar a brain tumor and kill him off? Seriously, ABC, what the heck? (Family-friendly word inserted in place of the one in my brain.)

Here's my GH PSA for the week: Dear Kim, allow me to enlighten you... NO ONE in Port Charles can keep a secret. They all follow the "If I only tell one person at a time, it's not gossip" mentality. Last week, no one knew; this week, Drew, Sam, Liz, Franco, and Cameron all know.

Next week's previews indicate that when Cameron confronts Oscar, Oscar actually knows. That would make sense. If Oscar knows and is playing along with his Mom, pretending he doesn't know he's sick to appease her, I will be happier with the writing than having them trying to convince me that a smart kid with cancer can't tell he's sick after years of medical tests. Oscar and Josslyn may not have long, but I am still enjoying the sweetness of their relationship. I fear we are heading to a redo of Robin and Stone as Joss lays next to Oscar, watching him die, but maybe someone out there has a miracle cure.

Another doomed but adorable couple right now is Mike and Stella. They have such a sweet chemistry and interaction together. I love their scenes, but as Mike said this week, in the absolute best line of the week, "When I can't remember you anymore, remember that I wanted to." Whoever wrote that line gets the T-Emmy award for writing (Tamilu Emmy).

There were several poignant scenes this week. I loved the Carly/Brad scenes. Brad has always been a weasel on GH, but when he started dating Lucas, we saw him soften and begin to grow a conscience. Right now, he is hiding a terrible secret, but we see the weight of that on him in every scene. Parry Shen is doing wonderful work with this.

Carly was giving Brad a pep talk on parenting. They had a sweet bonding moment, but readers, let me tell you -- when Carly discovers that Brad has knowingly been keeping her grandchild way from Michael, she will eviscerate him. And I can hardly wait for that scene! No one does soap attacks better than Laura Wright.

I hope that happens sooner rather than later. Like by the end of the month, or at the latest, Christmas -- not when Noah is like 14. I love the scenes when Michael is holding "Wiley," totally unaware that it's his kid. But isn't it soapaliciously hilarious that the baby has this rare heart condition that Michael and A.J. had, and that Brad and Nelle were buddies, and that no one is even slightly suspicious of this turn of events? After Nelle got Carly committed to Ferncliff, you'd think her radar would be more finely tuned.

Of course, Ferncliff is missing its most dangerous psycho patient right now. Kevin is locked in Ferncliff, and Ryan is roaming the streets.

When Ryan got out Franco's files to read, I thought, "Yikes. He's going to weaponize Franco." Franco has come a long way since he first appeared in Port Charles, but he's still a little nuts, and I feel like Ryan could definitely steer Franco back toward the dark side. Maybe Ryan won't kill anyone himself but will convince Franco to do it. I realize that's a leap, but some of you may not remember just how crazy Ryan actually is. Watching him have dinner with Lucy gave me the chills. Why do vampires and psychopaths always get drawn to her? I'm hoping we get to see some flashbacks along the way to bring the younger audience up to speed.

Here's an observation, courtesy of my husband, who pretends not to watch GH. This kind of continuity error drives him mad. As I'm writing, he keeps yelling out to me "Don't forget to say Lucy was waiting 15 minutes for Priest Guy" ...Here goes...

When Lucy showed up at the hospital to meet Griffin to show him apartments -- she rushed in saying, "I've been waiting for you downstairs for 15 minutes!" However, right before she arrived, Griffin told Kiki he was supposed to have his hearing about his suspension, but it had just been canceled. So, did he tell Lucy to meet him at the same time as his hearing? Curious.

Readers, is it bad that I liked when Mike pretended to have an Alzheimer's moment when he really wasn't having one? I know it's a sad and serious disease. I lost someone in my family to it and would not make light of it, yet, I loved that scene. Seriously, Margaux and Jordan deserved it for badgering an old man with Alzheimer's to begin with.

We finally know why Margaux has her sights set on Sonny -- her father is the man Sonny murdered when he was 18. (When she said, "Vincent Marino is my father," Jeff rolled his eyes.) This is a bit of a stretch for me. Margaux's dad has been buried under Charlie's for decades, and she ends up in Port Charles as the new D.A. just as the bar blows up, revealing his remains? That's a little too neat for me.

Is it physically possible to get fingerprints off a gun that's been buried for 37 years? (He shot him when he was 18, and in real life, Maurice is 55, so I used a calculator to arrive at 37.)

I don't know if that's possible. I don't know if Sonny will get caught. But I do know that Maurice Benard just got the role of John Gotti in a new movie, so if Sonny got caught and had to go to prison for a while, it would give him time to film his movie. Just a thought.

Let's not forget that Sonny has claustrophobia and, if locked up, will probably react like Peter August in the elevator. Peter's PTSD panic attack was definitely justified, and I'm glad Maxie jumped in to help. As much as I'd like to see the two of them reconnect, I think the writers will make it a slow, drawn-out process because keeping people apart seems to be their one writing move. I wish we had one writer who wanted to actually write a couple together.

Remember the old days when Luke and Laura, Jason and Sam, Mac and Felicia, Anna and Robert, etc., were on the run together? They were fighting forces from the outside but were together and happy in spite of their circumstances. I do. I like the "You and me against the world" kind of storylines. I'm still a hopeless romantic in my AARP years.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Dr. Finn treat his father's mystery illness? Will Sasha take the DNA test and start calling Nina "Mama"? Will Maxie be mad when she finds out Lulu told the guy she's secretly crushing on for to stay away from her? Will Jason believe that Julian is not a threat to Sonny, or will he stop by for Sonnybucks every day to keep an eye on him? Will Maxie and Michael take their babies on playdates together once Michael gets his baby back? Will everyone in town give Lulu a pass for writing about the Ryan Chamberlain murders, even though they just barely forgave her for writing the Faison story that got Nathan killed?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

What are your thoughts on General Hospital? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- and there are many ways you can share your thoughts.

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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