A jinx on good fortune

For the Week of June 10, 2019
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A life was saved, justice was served, and a mother's sacrifice was safeguarded, but are things just a little too good to be true? Our columnist certainly thinks so, and she's not afraid to jinx it by sharing her thoughts.

What a week! Sweet, sweet justice was served in so many wonderful ways, starting with Shiloh's arrest.

It was oh so wonderfully delightful to see Shank's eyes grow round with shock, his jaw clench with fury, and his nostrils flare with frustration as Chase slapped those cuffs on. My favorite part, though, was the moment when smug Shiloh realized that Margaux didn't care about his threats because she not only had her pledge back, but she had also decided to quit her job. Shiloh's vexation was written all over his face, and I half expected him to break a few back molars as he gnashed his teeth together in impotent rage.

Yet, I feel that it's all just a little too neat and tidy. Call me jaded, but my gut tells me that it's far from over. Shiloh is certain to have a few more tricks up his sleeve, and I'm not referring to Harmony.

Folks, if there was any doubt in my mind that Harmony was not Willow's biological mother, Harmony's actions over the week eradicated them. There is not a drop of maternal love in her for Willow, and I realized that Harmony didn't keep quiet about Willow and the pregnancy because she loved her daughter more than she cared for Shiloh. No, Harmony kept quiet because she was jealous. Willow was able to give Shiloh what Harmony couldn't -- a child. That's why Shiloh called Harmony an empty vessel, and that's why Harmony wanted Willow gone. Shiloh's obsession with Willow would have intensified tenfold had he known about Willow's pregnancy, and Harmony feared the competition.

It wasn't a mother's love, but rather a lover's jealousy that silenced Harmony about the pregnancy. And now, when Shiloh is facing sexual assault charges and the cult's shady practices are about to face the unflinching scrutiny of the law, Harmony thinks that she can salvage her dysfunctional relationship with Shiloh by handing him the child he was denied. Harmony doesn't care about the child's welfare. She's only interested in doing what puts her in Shiloh's good graces, even if that means destroying an innocent life. Why not? She did it before when she let Shiloh drug her barely eighteen-year-old daughter and have his wicked way with her.

I really don't think that a mother -- a loving mother -- would do those things or see her own daughter as a rival rather than the victim of a sexual predator, which is what Willow is. That said, the only way that I want Harmony to uncover the truth about Wiley is if it immediately leads to the reveal that he's Jonah. I do not want even fictional cult leaders and his minions caring for an innocent babe.

In a surprising twist, Julian and Sam actually worked together when they teamed up to switch Wiley's birth records with some doctored ones intended to throw Shiloh off when he goes digging for information about Willow's pregnancy. Unfortunately, Julian decided to clue Alexis in, and she thought that the best course of action was to share her concerns about Julian's efforts to protect Wiley with the two most stable, rational-thinking, law-abiding citizens that she could find. Nah, I'm kidding. She talked to Sonny and Carly about it.

I cannot even begin to fathom why anyone -- let alone Alexis -- would go straight to Sonny and Carly with a delicate matter. Sonny solves problems with bullets, and Carly views problems as an opportunity to cook up cockamamie schemes that inevitably blow up in her face in spectacular fashion while claiming a few causalities along the way. Mark my words, nothing good will come of this. Nothing.

I realize that Alexis thinks that she's helping, but Julian made a really good point when he reminded St. Alexis that she had been complicit in the abduction and deprograming of her own daughter from a cult. I also would like to know why it's okay for Alexis, Sonny, Jason, and just about everyone else to break the law for the greater good, but not Julian? Heck, in Julian's case, he's protecting a child. Kristina was an adult who walked into that cult with open eyes and arms.

I adore Alexis, but she needs to schedule an appointment with Neil, stat.

Now, time for the intrigue at the hospital. And there definitely is something afoot, judging by all the ominous music, cryptic comments, and downright shifty behavior between the foes of Ryan. Also, you know that you are persona non grata in Port Charles when you donate a kidney, slip into a coma, and are shipped off to Pentonville before the anesthesia wears off.

That's how they roll in Port Charles with serial killers who refuse to die.

The usual suspects are Kevin and Laura Collins, Franco and Liz Webber-Baldwin, Dr. Hamilton Finn, and Curtis Ashford. From what I can piece together, Franco slipped into Ryan's hospital room and injected some mystery substance into Ryan's I.V., which triggered a seizure of some kind. While Finn and Liz took action helping Ryan, Franco disposed of the gloves. That's when Cam entered the picture and questioned Franco's sketchy behavior.

I love Cam. He's got a suspicious mind and an innate sense of when people are up to no good. It's a gift that will serve him well living in Port Charles.

If I had to guess, the switch took place right after the seizure. From that point on, Kevin posed as Ryan. And Stella, who had embraced her inner Lucy Van Pelt to face a serial killer, stormed the room to have a chat with "Ryan" about giving Jordan a kidney -- or else. I don't believe that Stella was in on the ruse, but Valerie might have been. I found it odd that Valerie had suddenly replaced Deputy Barney Fife on guard duty, which suggests to me that Barney was with the real Ryan. Did Laura play the Spencer card to get Valerie to help? Possible.

When "Ryan" caved because of Stella's browbeating, I knew that something wasn't right. I tried to pay attention to Ryan's lobbed off limb, but it remained conspicuously out of sight. Regardless, I know that Ryan would never surrender an organ without getting something for it. I don't care if Satan himself demanded it. Ryan is a serial killer. To him, Jordan's death would have been another notch in his belt, so he had zero incentive to give the gift of life.

Frankly, I love the idea of everyone conspiring to get that kidney from Ryan through hook or crook. Friday's episode had a very Murder on the Orient Express feel to it, especially at the end when everyone had gathered to watch Ryan's departure for Pentonville. The silent, but very telling, glances between Finn, Franco, Liz, Kevin, and Laura were quite revealing -- and satisfying because it confirmed my suspicions that they had pulled off the impossible right before our very eyes. I don't mind at all that laws were broken because it's a soap opera, and, in the end, the right thing was done. A life was saved.

That's why I didn't have an issue with Kristina's loved ones kidnapping her from DOD, or with Julian and Sam working together to safeguard Wiley.

If it's for the greater good, protecting the innocent, doing the right thing, or anything along those lines, then I don't mind if soap characters step over the line. It's not like the bad guys are playing by the rules, and the laws of real life don't apply. If they did, half the cast would be long dead, and the majority of the other half would be in jail.

I watch soaps for the entertainment, and I'm okay with the writers taking some liberties to give the good guys the edge in battling the various monsters that they encounter. Justice can be delivered in many ways, and evil men like Shiloh and Ryan deserve a little extra suffering for their sins than just life behind bars or death.

I do, however, have issues with hypocrisy. And Sonny is the king of it.

It irks me how Sonny treats Ava because he has no room to judge her. None. Yes, she switched out Morgan's pills with placebos, but she didn't put Morgan in that car or plant the bomb that killed him. What Ryan did to Kiki doesn't come close to comparing to what happened to Morgan. There were no warning signs that Kiki was about to be brutally killed. There was no opportunity for her family to intervene on her behalf and avert disaster.

There was with Morgan.

Sonny and Carly knew that something was wrong. They talked to Andre about their concerns, but they trusted the medication even when their eyes told them that it wasn't working. It was tragic, and I don't blame Sonny and Carly any more for what happened than I do Ava. That bomb was planted by Olivia Jerome, not Ava. Olivia killed Morgan because, but for that bomb, Morgan would have walked away from that car when he had pulled over to the side of the road.

Ryan wielded the knife that snuffed out Kiki's life then he used Ava as his alibi. The writers haven't really delved into it yet, but I can't imagine that Ava views that first sexual encounter with Ryan, when her daughter's blood was still fresh on his hands, as anything other than a sexual assault. I know that I would.

The loss of a child is horrendous regardless of the circumstances. How many sons and daughters has Sonny killed during his long, illustrious career as a mobster? He's no better than Ava.

At some point, Sonny and Carly need to put Avery first. As long as Ava is a free woman and she has a legal right to visit her daughter, she is going to remain a part of Avery's life. As Avery grows older, how do you think Avery will feel when she is told horrible things about her mother by the people that she loves and trusts then those very same trustworthy people hand Avery over to mommy dearest for visitations? And what happens when Avery realizes that her mother isn't any scarier than daddy the mob boss?

I would have so much more respect for Sonny and Carly if they tried to make peace, for Avery's sake, and help Ava to be the mother that Avery deserves. If Ava fails, then Avery will know that Sonny and Carly did their best to do the right thing because they put their love for Avery ahead of their hatred for Ava.

So, what is up with all of Carly's prenatal tests? Are the writers taking an opportunity to teach viewers about the challenges of a high-risk geriatric pregnancy, or is something afoot? Carly keeps worrying that she's borrowing trouble by taking all of these tests, and I'm starting to agree with her. There's a reason that the scribes have decided to go down this road with Carly and Sonny, and it's not just about expanding their brood.

I can't imagine that the endgame is for the baby to die. That would be beyond cruel, since Sonny and Carly have already lost their first two children. However, the very fact that everything is going so well spells trouble ahead. I'm not sure how I feel about that because this is supposed to be a medical-based drama, and it could be interesting to see Sonny and Carly face the challenges of raising a disabled child. But, I'm also a mom, so I don't wish that on any child, even fictional ones.

On a lighter note, I have a feeling that we don't know the gender of the baby yet because the writers have a gender reveal episode planned for us. At least, I hope so. It would be a fun way for Sonny and Carly to share the news with their friends, their family -- and the viewers. I think it's a boy, but I'm rooting for a girl.

In other Ava news, Maxie persuaded Nina to exploit Ava by putting Ava on the cover of Crimson. Maxie is convinced that Ava's sordid tale of woe with a serial killer will sell issues and prove to Jax that Nina has a great assistant. Uh, I mean, Nina is a great editor.

All kidding aside, the whole exchange was a sad reminder of why Nina has no business running a fashion magazine. Also, Nina has no room to ever point fingers at Ava after ripping Avery from Ava's womb while Ava was under the effects of a paralytic drug that left her unable to move but able to feel every agonizing and terrifying second of that nightmarish ordeal. Additionally, Nina didn't even like Kiki all that much. She resented Silas' love child with Ava, so for her to go on about how much pain Ava caused Kiki was rather ironic. Nina wasn't all that nice to Kiki, either.

I know that Ava has done terrible things, and she certainly deserves plenty of scorn, but Nina got her pound of flesh from Ava -- and then some. It would serve Nina right if Ava's story has the opposite effect of the one that Nina anticipates.

Folks, I know that this might sound a bit odd, but I'm really hoping that Sasha somehow escapes this tangled web of deceit that she's gotten herself caught in without too much damage. I really like her, and I especially like her with Michael. Their chemistry is natural, and she makes Michael smile and act like the young man that he is. Despite how Sasha has been introduced, she actually seems like a genuinely nice person. I also get the sense that lying isn't really something that she's all that comfortable with.

Sasha is a lucky girl because she found the one guy in town who is likely to stand by her side when her secrets are exposed. Michael is not the type to cut and run just because someone does something stupid, especially when he finds out that Valentin masterminded the ruse to get Nina to marry him. Sasha was never any match for a man like that, so I'm sure that people will see Sasha for the pawn that she was -- especially Michael.

I hope Sasha musters up the courage to tell Michael the truth. It's already partially out there, since he heard her confession during her fevered delirium.

Finally, with Margaux stepping down as district attorney, a new nemesis for Sonny (the main crime wave in Port Charles) will be stepping forward. Will it be a blast from the past or someone new? I've heard some whispers, but I don't want to jinx it. All I can say is that I hope that they are true. Stay tuned!

Random observations

What was the point of Jordan asking Stella to be her advocate? The DNR never became an issue. It was simply a discussion, which, frankly, should have taken place between Jordan and Curtis.

What is the deal with the Port Charles clerk of courts? It looked like Julian and Sam hopped into a DeLorean and found their way to 1980. The only thing missing was a canary yellow rotary phone on the desk.

It drives me batty that people can just walk into Willow's classroom whenever they please. Access to classrooms, especially when school is in session, is no easy matter in the era of school shooters. The idea that Harmony was able to stroll into Willow's classroom to harass her, while Willow's class was at recess, was downright preposterous. The parking lot must look like a DeLorean dealership.

Reader feedback

FINALLY! It's been almost two years since Original Recipe Jason came back, and it's taken all this time for he and Drew to start treating each other like brothers, instead of enemies, or rivals. Now it's time for Drew to get rid of Jason's memories, recover his own, and become his own man, once and for all. There's got to be a way around the problem of erasing his more recent memories, so that Drew can regain his past, and still retain his present. It's just Soapy Fringe Science! They can do whatever they WANT to do! -- Scrimmage

Nina's behavior is REALLY unappealing! The fact that Valentin is egging her on is disheartening! Despite a boatload of flaws, Valentin unquestionably loves Nina! Even his incredibly stupid plan of "finding" her daughter Sasha. I think the fact that he searched heaven and earth to find Nina's daughter but couldn't is alone a romantic gesture! But, NO, he has to concoct this scheme of finding her faux daughter which will BLOW UP BADLY in his face! -- Sally Chin

I still don't get why Curtis and the others wanted Ryan alive for his kidney. Organs and kidneys are commonly harvested from the dead. If he was dead, they could have had two kidneys. -- Karen Larsen Graham

Thank you for taking the time to read my thoughts. I love hearing from readers, so please feel free to drop me a line or leave a comment below.

Take care and happy viewing,
Liz Masters

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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