Doggone Teflon

For the Week of July 22, 2019
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Nina regretted outing Willow's secret, there was a coed dorm party at Pentonville, Liesl was "pooshed" and was trying to solve a mystery, and Shiloh is roaming around town on the "I got bail" tour. Let's discuss in this week's Two Scoops.

Readers, there are people in the world who, no matter what terrible thing they do, always seem to sail away unscathed while leaving a pile of wreckage in their wake.

These creatures exist in real life but also have quite a representation on Daytime TV. You have your Heather Webber, your Helena Cassadine, your Sheila Carter, your Victor Newman (yes, I think he's a villain), your Caesar Faison, your Jerry Jacks -- I could go on and on. They get away with every evil deed for years without getting caught. Or, they get caught but then they are out almost immediately and are back on track to evil. Or, you think they are dead, and one day, 20 years later, there they are again. Sometimes they were even frozen and had to be thawed out to commit more crimes!

Now, Shiloh has been added to their ranks. With all the evidence and eyewitness testimony against him from Sam, Kristina, and Harmony that proves he manipulated young women; drugged, raped, and tattooed them with a creepy brand; probably murdered Willow's dad; and blackmailed all the people in his "Trust" -- he got bail and is out walking around. Sadly, this storyline is a little too close to the current week's news headlines, so it just creeps me out. As my husband, who pretends not to watch GH, pointed out, Shiloh managed to make it to half of the dining establishments in Port Charles and to Pentonville in one short hour on his gloating "I got bail" tour.

I am worried about Harmony because, as soon as she started boldly declaring her intentions to testify against him and take him down, I thought, "Uh-oh, she's not going to live to see the trial." And her cellmate is crazy Nelle, so double the worry. Is there any chance she will still be alive to testify against him? At least there is Kristina. I have always loved Lexi Ainsworth, and when she was gone, I threw her name into the mix of my columns a dozen times, urging anyone who would listen to bring her back. I am glad she is back on the GH canvas, and she is perfectly cast as Sonny's fiery daughter. I loved watching her confront Shiloh this week while Daisy watched in utter shock.

Question: when did Pentonville turn into a coed dorm? We saw Ryan and Harmony bumping into each other in the corridors and Nelle in the infirmary while Ryan was recovering. Who would put a serial killer who has killed nine women in a prison where he is in proximity to more women? I mean, they didn't let Hannibal Lecter have a prison buffet; they locked him up in solitary confinement. I'm worried about Ryan reading the Dawn of Day book, deciding to fake a conversion, and taking over the cult for Shiloh. At least he wouldn't be able to hold the girls down to tattoo them. Since he only has one arm, they could probably wriggle away. Oh, wait, the drugs.

But I digress. Back to the chaos at Pentonville. I guess there are varying levels of visitation... Jordan and Curtis could only visit Ryan via phone through a glass, but Harmony got the private visitation suite, where Willow and Shiloh could just walk right in and sit on a picnic bench.

Plus, Shiloh is out on bail, accused of multiple crimes. Would he really even be able to get into a prison to visit? Wouldn't the guards tell Harmony who her visitor was before she came out so she could decline the visit? But, hey, I guess Soap prison has its own rules, and who am I to question them?

From cult leaders to Sibley the Psychic. Sorry to all of you who go to psychics, but I do not believe that Sibley was talking to Kiki. I think she's some scam artist that one of Ava's enemies hired to drive her mad. Maybe Ryan. Who knows? I am just not buying it. While I loved the movie Ghost, I don't think I can take months of Sibley channeling dead Kiki with Ava begging for forgiveness.

Wouldn't this be a great time for Griffin Monroe to come back and help Ava find faith? I actually liked Ava and Griffin together. I knew he'd eventually ditch Ava for Kiki, but I think they actually kind of worked for a while. I just hope the psychic readings won't go on too long, I already lost interest in the middle of the first one.

I'm much more interested in seeing the treehouse that Drew and Jason are building. I'd love to see the two of them outside, hammering stuff in a tree, wouldn't you? I like the fact that these two estranged brothers are actually bonding a little. If they have to work together to take down Shiloh, all the better. Shiloh had a flashback of Drew when he still looked like Jason, and I was very intrigued. What secret do you think Drew knows about Shiloh that Shiloh is so afraid he will remember?

Drew and Franco made their peace, so maybe there is hope for Jason and Drew, too. Franco didn't offer to help build a treehouse, as he's a little busy this week with his wedding reception, Aiden's birthday party, and helping Dr. O figure out who pushed her overboard. Everyone assumed she was just hammered and fell in, but Franco found a photo that showed someone lurking in the background. But whose shoes are they? Wouldn't it be hilarious if it was the Boy Scout kid with the bugle from when she was holding Peter hostage in that cabin last year? But it was probably Brad.

One other fun theory is that since we keep hearing talk about Nikolas and Spencer, maybe Nikolas Cassadine is alive and secretly in town, and he pushed Obrecht -- that would be a fun twist.

If so, please let it be Tyler Christopher. He didn't deny it this week when Twitter went nuts with rumors of his return, but he didn't confirm it, either. They also spoke of a taller Spencer who looks a lot like his dad and said that his voice has changed, so I am hoping that they aren't going to SORAS Spencer, though, since they aged all the other kids he used to play with, it seems like a possibility.

If Nikolas is alive, this would be a perfect time to bring him home. Lulu was just served with divorce papers from Dante, ostensibly because he was so distressed over shooting Peter. But will Lulu let it go, or stand and fight? She could use a brother's support through this time in her life, and Laura would love to have her son back. With Hayden back in town, Ava still crushing on Nikolas, and wow, we haven't seen Britt Westborne for a while -- there is no end to the potential romantic storyline for Nikolas. Next up, the Cassadine showdown between Nikolas and Valentin would be a thing to behold. And the side battle of Spencer and Charlotte would prove entertaining, too.

Readers, I want Mac to stay police commissioner forever. I don't want Jordan to take over again. I'm sorry, but her police work is a snooze. Give me fiery Mac on the trail of a bad guy any day. Maybe Ryan's prediction will come true. Maybe his kidney will infect Jordan and make her start doing bad things -- and no one will suspect her. It would be crazy, but I like GH crazy. And it would be a more interesting storyline than her walking around the PCPD, looking stern.

Across town in the teen scene, Cam convinces his parents to let him keep Oscar's car, even though he can't drive it at the moment. Good news for him, Dev has a fake license. What could possibly go wrong? Dev hasn't quite caught on yet about the cultural differences between Turkey and the US. After he casually talked about committing multiple crimes, Joss tried to explain it away by saying, "He comes from a rough neighborhood." Trina was not buying it; she's too smart to be put off the scent that easily. I predict the wildly impulsive Dev will get the Corinthos clan into a lot of trouble.

Is Sonny going to groom Dev to be part of his business? Michael begged to be in and was declined. But, in Sonny's worldview, Dev would be safer working for him than he would be on the streets of Turkey alone. He's not wrong, but saving a kid from the Turkish mob by putting him in the Port Charles mob isn't exactly saving him.

I really loved the scene where Carly told Joss that she had the right to an opinion and a voice in their family -- that she was allowed to speak her mind and that if she was uncomfortable with Dev being in their home, to say so. I wish all parents told their kids they have a voice and that they knew their input would be heard and respected. So many kids run away or take their own lives, and a lot of times, it's because they feel trapped. If a kid felt confident in saying "Hey, Mom, your new boyfriend hits me when you are at work, and I don't want him living here," or "I don't want to move again; this is the first place I have ever made friends," etc., it could help a lot of kids feel they had a way out. This from a Nana of nine who hears lots of kids' confessions -- they need to feel understood and heard.

Willow's baby was too young to have a say, but she decided he would be safer far from Shiloh. I feel so sorry for Willow, fighting so hard to protect a baby who is actually dead, who died as an infant, and she has no idea. Even so, Diane and Alexis gave Willow the good news that Shiloh was locked up and that he was unable to pursue custody of Wiley while his case was ongoing. As soon as I saw them all celebrating, I knew he'd be out of jail by the end of the hour.

I hope someone rescues poor Daisy soon. I hope Kristina hires Neil to lock her in a cabin and deprogram her. Of course, she's poor now; she used all of her money to bail out Shiloh, so he will have no further use for her, I suppose.

When NuNina realized that Willow was trying to protect her baby from a creep, she had a change of heart, and I think Nina will launch a campaign to get Willow's job back for her. Or maybe she will hire her to be Charlotte's nanny. Either way, if NuNina gets on board with Willow and runs a big Crimson exposÚ on Shiloh and the cult of Dawn of Day, maybe the truth will put Shiloh away. It's a lovely dream I have, that the people who commit horrendous crimes, no matter how rich or powerful, eventually have those crimes exposed and have to pay for what they have done.

But instead, she might try to hire Sasha to stay in town and be Charlotte's nanny, which would make Valentin's heart race and pulse quicken. Sasha's presence in Port Charles increases the chance of all his lies being exposed, which I predict will happen before the wedding. That thought used to trouble me when Michele was Nina; I loved them as a couple in a totally unhealthy fangirl way, but with NuNina and Valentin, I'm kind of like... "Meh." I am not so invested in their coupling anymore. I'd rather see Valentin have a fling with Ava or maybe Anna after Finn dumps her for Hayden when he finds out he has a kid.

I know the writers are building up to the big secret that Sasha isn't Nina's daughter, but I find myself less invested now. Is it just me? I'm not saying I don't care about Nina. I just don't care about the coupling as much. I like Cynthia Watros, but recasts always are jarring for me. (Except with Carlys, save the one short-term Carly)

I like the character of Sasha, and although she took money to be a fake daughter, she seems perfectly lovely otherwise. It's just Michael's luck to have fallen for her, though. He has a history of picking the wrong girl almost every time. Carly likes Sasha right now, but after she finds out Sasha is a fake, will she still be on Sasha's side? Considering Carly's shady past, maybe she can mentor Sasha on how to come back from being a bad girl. But...I think I actually prefer Michael and Willow together. Maybe Chase can have Sasha (or maybe Lulu, since Dante's seemingly out of the picture).

Dante shooting Peter off-screen was shocking, but not as shocking as if we had seen Dante pull the trigger. If that was their plan, to have Dante out of the picture for good, couldn't ABC have hired Dom Zamprogna for the afternoon to do the shooting Peter scene? If this is really the end of Dante and Lulu, I wish we could have just had a glimpse of him.

I liked the scene where Maxie had a moment of self-realization and said, "I never listen!" Mind you, I don't think she will start listening now. I mean, does anyone here remember the Levi Dunkelman fiasco? But I like that every now and then, they allow the self-absorbed to become self-aware, if only in glimpses.

Even Liesl had a moment of self-awareness this week and told Nina that "every day [she does] one or two terrible things," which made me howl, as do all of her lines. Kathleen Gati is a gem, and whoever is writing her dialogue should get their own special Emmy. Obrecht hinted to Nina that Shiloh might not be Wiley's dad -- but didn't expound. I am really ready for this secret to come out. I am tired of the entire town fretting over this when we all know that Willow's baby is dead and gone. Why didn't anyone check the DNA results before tossing them into the trash? That could have ended this nightmare.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Lulu re-date all her fake story dates for real this time? Will Drew give Spinelli his memory chip to hack so we can unravel whatever the heck Shiloh is hiding? Will we find out what sort of baseball game only takes three players, two on one team and one on the other? Will Sam's new friend the tattoo removal guy have to open a second location when all the DOD girls come calling to get their creepy cult sex tattoo removed?

Will Aiden and Franco go to the pastry chef's show and get picked to be on a father/son edition of Chopped Jr? Will all the parents in Port Charles let their kids eat dirty sidewalk pi˝ata candy? Will Jax stop pretending to date Hayden so he can date someone real? Will Vanessa Marcil come back and bring Brenda to woo Jax back? (please) Will Ava tell me who does her hair because I need a new sassy hairdo?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

What are your thoughts on General Hospital? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- and there are many ways you can share your thoughts.

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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