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Long marriages on television usually fall into two categories: unrealistically perfect, or painfully miserable, but Modern Family refuses to pick a side and that is exactly why Claire and Phil Dunphy feel so real. They are loving, chaotic, supportive, competitive, and occasionally exhausting and are proof that great TV couples can be both aspirational and deeply flawed.
Which raises the question Modern Family fans have been debating for years: Are the Dunphys the best couple on television? Or are they an absolute nightmare? Maybe the answer is both.
Five reasons why Modern Family's Claire and Phil Dunphy are the perfect couple
Both of them complement each other's personalities
Yes, Phil is the goofball we all love and Claire is a perfectionist with p;anners, calendars and the need for things to fall into place, but their opposite personalities complement each other in funny and heartwarming ways. They both keep each other grounded and make sure they balance each other out. Where Claire is always there to shoot Phil's dangerous plans down and lets him be in touch with his inner child, Phil tries his best to stay optimistic around her even when she hits the ceiling. He softens her rigidity and she grounds Phil’s chaos. Yin, Yang, domestic bliss. It's not the perfect marriage, but it for sure is wholesome!
They're both very supportive of each other's careers
Although Claire started off as a stay-at-home mom, her later rise to working at Pritchett's Closets is thoroughly supported by Phil. He recognizes her strengths and they both balance out their professional lives along with managing their kids. He also supports her aspirations to join the city council. On the other hand, Claire too helps Phil out with his realtor duties when needed. Together, they work on their ambitions, without either of them sacrificing their careers and it's another reason why they're one of the best depictions of a healthy marriage on screen.
Even after three kids, the passion is just as steamy
We love a couple who never let the spark die! Three kids and almost two decades later, Phil and Claire are just as romantic with each other, with some wholesome, and some steamy moments across the show, and their obvious attraction to each other, even years later. They know how to keep magic alive, be it their roleplaying as Julianna and Clive or the little sweet moments across the show. Although Phil is the more romantic one between them, we love a couple who continue to fall in love with each other even as years pass by!
Both of them constantly have each other's backs
With the rowdy kids and all the relatives who can sometimes be a little too messy, both of them constantly have each other's backs, they scheme together, they support each other's crazy ideas and despite anything else that happens, they always work as a team.
Not just that, they also fight in a healthy way. There's no rage, ego or silent wars. They resolve their conflicts like adults who love each other at the end of it all and never treat each other disrespectfully.
They share a passion for the things they love
Halloween is always the best time to be at the Dunphy's because of how seriously they both take the holiday. Their love for all things spooky, even if things get a little competitive sometimes, is adorable and this shared passion lets them bond even more.
On the other hand, they're also passionate about the things the other person loves. Claire learns magic to impress Phil and he constantly supports her passion for closets. There's a wonderful balance here where they both can shine without dimming the other, and that is why they're one of the best, most realistic depictions of a marriage on screen.
Five reasons why Modern Family's Claire and Phil are the worst couple on TV
Phil's attraction towards Gloria is creepy and weird
Despite having the woman he loves and was attracted to since college days, Phil's constant attraction towards Gloria is a huge turn off. He is constantly getting the hots for her, oftentimes inappropriately and oftentimes right in front of Claire and it's uncomfortable to watch.
Not just Gloria; Phil is way too comfortable finding other women attractive despite being married.
Phil is too childish sometimes
Yes, we love Phil Dunphy for being the goofball he is but sometimes it's at the expense of Claire. Oftentimes he messes up, with Claire having to clean up after him and often times he refuses to accept his mistake, which ends up with the episode painting Claire as a control freak who is overly perfect.
Their parenting styles are too different
Where Phil aims to be the chill father who lets his kids get away with anything, Claire is often the sane voice in the household, which paints the whole "good cop, mom" vibe in the house. The kids prefer Phil because he is constantly goofy and lets them do everything they want, while Claire is often chided for being controlling and wanting them to be perfect. Although this dynamic is shown humorously on the show, it often clashes in ways that strain their marriage.
Sometimes they're way too competitive
Yes, some competition is healthy but when their competitiveness and their need to always defeat the other person intensifies, their relationship doesn't look all that cheery on camera. Both of them have a tendency to want to win, which leads to absurd competitions like racing to Manny's birthday or fighting over who gets to decide what Halloween would look like.
Sometimes it does feel like Claire settled for Phil
Sometimes it really does feel like Claire settled for Phil because she outgrew the version of life she once imagined and Phil is the same man she fell in love with all those years ago...and not in the best way. Claire is hyper competent, ambitious, and constantly carrying the mental load, while Phil gets to float through life powered by optimism and dad jokes.
She compromises more, she adjusts more and she matures faster. Phil adores her, yes, but adoration is not always an equal partnership.
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Modern Family is available to watch on Peacock.
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