It's been more than three decades since Friends premiered, and the craze doesn't seem to stop anytime soon. Counted as one of the most popular sitcoms of all time, the story follows six friends in their late twenties — Rachel, Monica, Phoebe, Chandler, Joey, and Ross — as they navigate their lives in Manhattan, New York City.
Deviating from the main cast, in this article we will talk about a character who is regarded by many as one of the most controversial and misunderstood in the sitcom. It's Emily Waltham. Portrayed by Helen Baxendale, Emily first appeared in Friends Season 4, in the episode titled The One with Joey's Dirty Day, as Rachael's boss, Mr. Waltham's niece, She had arrived for a two-week vacation in New York. During the tenure, Ross and Emily fell in love, leading to a tale of whirlwind romance culminating in a disastrous London wedding. The disaster? Ross took Rachel's name during his vows at the altar instead of Emily's. Quite humiliating, right?
Years later, while many fans remember her as a controlling woman who ruined Ross and Rachel's potential reunion, a fresh look at Emily's character would reveal a more nuanced perspective — one that challenges the popular notion of labelling her as a 'villain'.
Emily Waltham wasn't the problem in Friends, Ross was
During the wedding vows, when Ross mistakenly took Rachel's name at the altar, it was quite humiliating for Emily. The scene was written in a way that it drew the laughs because Friends is, after all, a sitcom, but in reality such a situation could be a public humiliation — a clear indication that Ross was having second thoughts about marrying Emily.
Emily understandably storms out — only to later give Ross another chance. That alone makes her more forgiving than most people would be in such a position.
Ross makes it worse when he brings Rachel on their honeymoon. Even though it was a last-minute decision (and Ross wasn't sure if Emily would turn up), from his ill-fated wife Emily's perspective, this was a confirmation that Ross wasn't fully committed to the marriage. Imagine marrying someone relocating to another country for them, and then seeing them refuse to cut ties with the person they still have feelings for.
Was Emily's ultimatum — that Ross stop seeing Rachel — really that extreme? Maybe, but Ross had already proven that he couldn't be trusted around her. His history with Rachael was messy, and Emily wasn't wrong to feel threatened. After all, Ross had been insanely jealous of Mark during his relationship with Rachel, so why did most fans of the show paint Emily as irrational and controlling for feeling the same way about him?
The bias towards Ross and Rachel in Friends
The sitcom did have a plan to prioritize Ross and Rachel's love story. That meant Emily had to be written out, but instead of a graceful exit, the show turned her into a shrill, demanding character. Her valid insecurities were exaggerated into controlling behaviour. Emily was initially introduced as a fun, witty, and interesting character. However, her entire personality was changed post-wedding to make Ross look like the 'better' person in the toxic relationship.
Emily wasn't perfect. She was insecure, impulsive, and at times quite unfair. But so were Ross and Rachel. In the end, Emily wasn't the problem — she was just caught in a one-sided love story.
Also read: How Many Seasons Of Friends Are There?