Funny Valentine: JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure’s most unconventional villain and the patriotism that set him apart

When fans talk about JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure’s villain, it is important to talk about Funny Valentine. After Araki changed the timeline and introduced his new story of Steel Ball Run, he was inspired by a movie and wanted to bring an antagonist who would be the President of a nation.

The Steel Ball Run race serves as the grand stage for Valentine’s scheme. On the surface, it’s a cross-country horse race across the American continent, but in reality, it’s a disguised expedition to collect the scattered parts of a mysterious Holy Corpse—implied to be the corpse of Jesus Christ.

Valentine’s goal is to assemble the corpse beneath American soil, thereby granting the country divine protection and shifting all misfortune away from its borders. In his mind, it’s the only way to ensure America's future as a global leader.

At first, Valentine’s actions in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Steel Ball Run feel noble. A man willing to sacrifice anything for his country is a trope we’re conditioned to admire. But as Steel Ball Run progresses, the truth begins to unravel. His version of patriotism is not one of unity and justice; it’s one of utilitarian coldness and dangerous nationalism.

He claims to act for America’s good, but consistently manipulates, sacrifices, and murders anyone who opposes him, even civilians. When he uses D4C to recruit Diego Brando, he is a volatile sociopath with no love for America. It’s clear that Valentine’s methods contradict his proclaimed ideals.

Perhaps the most revealing moment comes during his final confrontation with Johnny Joestar. Johnny hands him the gun that killed Gyro, a test to see if Valentine would lie and switch it with a gun from an alternate universe. Valentine fails. He lies, takes the fake gun, and tries to kill Johnny first. That moment shatters any illusion of moral superiority. He isn’t selfless; he just wants to be remembered as selfless.

The napkin analogy and the philosophy of power in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure

One of the most fascinating moments in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Steel Ball Run comes when Valentine explains his philosophy through an ordinary dining experience. If you’re seated at a table, he asks, which napkin do you pick: left or right? The answer doesn’t matter. What matters is who picked first. That person sets the standard. Society follows.

This, to Valentine, is the essence of leadership in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. America must be the one who picks the napkin first. It must set the standard for the world. He sees history not as a collective march of progress but as a series of decisive actions by individuals bold enough to act first. And he believes he is that person.

The brilliance of this analogy lies in its simplicity. It also reveals Valentine’s twisted understanding of fate and free will: that society functions best when the strong lead and the weak follow.

Charisma and the curse of conviction

What makes Funny Valentine in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure so dangerous isn’t just his Stand or tactics; it’s his charisma. Unlike Dio, who rules through fear and manipulation, Valentine persuades. He uses eloquence, logic, and passion. You believe him. You want to believe him.

That’s why fans compare him to real-life political leaders. He's a character who could exist in our world. This realism is what sets him apart. Dio is evil. Kira is psychotic. Pucci is fanatical. Valentine is human, as he is a reflection of how easily noble intentions can be twisted by obsession.

In the end, it’s Johnny Joestar in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure who challenges this idea. Johnny begins as selfish, obsessed with his own gain, but evolves into a man who believes in doing right regardless of the consequences.

His humanity stands in stark contrast to Valentine’s god complex. And when Johnny defeats him using Tusk Act 4’s infinite rotation, it’s not just a victory of Stand over Stand, it’s a victory of moral flexibility over absolute ideology.

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Final thoughts

Funny Valentine is the embodiment of twisted idealism, of patriotism turned poisonous, of sacrifice without empathy. And that’s why Funny Valentine isn’t just the best villain in JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure; he might be one of the greatest in anime history.

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