Welcome back! I hope your holiday was full of all the love and none of the stressy mess The Bold and the Beautiful characters are facing. From Douglas to Kelly, they all have issues. Pardon me if this Two Scoops is as jammed-packed as the last two weeks of episodes, but 2021 is moving at a breakneck pace toward 2022 after a season of stagnation. B&B is giving me the feels with a winter storm of drama, romance, and treachery. Thank you for a bang-up end to the year and an explosive start to 2022!
Taylor barreled in with her ill-thought-out advice, and now Sheila thinks she has a new ally. You know what generally happens when someone is kind to Sheila. All hell breaks loose for everyone else, namely her enemies and the people she cares about.
Sheila "tipsied" Macy over the edge back in 1993 when Thorne was unsupportive of Sheila's marriage to Eric. So, swapping out champagne bottles is definitely in Sheila's wheelhouse, and so is Brooke being unable to tell the difference (cough, cough -- Oliver), but if Sheila thinks she has a friend in Taylor, she might want to think again. Taylor's lonely, but I suspect she might want to talk to the cactus rather than Sheila. Sheila's all alone for New Year's Eve, and with the way she treats her so-called only friend Deacon, it's no wonder why.
So much has happened that the best way to cover it all is to give advice to each soul that had one hell of rude awakening this week -- or will have in the very near future. Additionally, in this Two Scoops, we'll seek some closure on several loose ends from 2021. Plus, history lessons and corrections are becoming a weekly necessity. Get the facts about what the characters say versus what really happened in my new "Truth be told" segment, coming up next.
I scooped up some facts in my last column during the Worst return segment, where I blasted Bold's continuity department for playing fast and loose with past events on the show. They're still up to it -- and at a reckless pace. Until it slows down, I'll try to research and get you the facts of what really happened in the past. I can't get to them all, so feel free to document any additional disturbances you find in the historical record in the comments section below.
"You know how my dad proposed to my mom? By having a treasure hunt in the Caribbean. Yeah, we were kids, and..." Steffy said, December 27th.
While Steffy is right that Ridge proposed to Taylor with a treasure hunt, it happened in 1992, before the children were born. So, no, Steffy, you weren't kids; you weren't even zygotes. What Steffy might be referring to is 2000-2001 when Ridge and Taylor returned to St. Thomas, and Ridge re-enacted the treasure hunt in the married couple's hotel room while proposing -- not marriage -- but a vows renewal. Born in 1998, Steffy was alive and in attendance, but she left out the best part of her trip -- being abducted by Morgan Dewitt and presumed dead! Like mother, like daughter, huh?
"You've always looked down your nose like you're better than me, but you're not, Brooke," said Sheila, December 27th.
Sheila attempted to compare her humble beginnings to Brooke's and failed miserably. Sheila proclaimed that she'd worked through nursing school, but Brooke had slept up the Forrester ladder. It's a pity that Sheila can't remember how Brooke made it at Forrester. After all, Sheila was right alongside Brooke, helping her take control of it. When the BeLieF coup failed and Brooke became CEO, she made Sheila her right-hand woman and BFF, something Sheila reminded Brooke of while holding her hostage in South America.
Because Brooke and Sheila battled Stephanie together, it was strange that Sheila disparaged Brooke with words from their common enemy. Sheila should closely watch who she calls a SFTV while comparing Brooke to Taylor. Taylor went to high school with Storm, so she must be from the valley. In 2006, Taylor confessed during her A.A. meeting to sleeping with men she didn't know. That's slutty behavior. So was bedding Stephen Logan Sr. that same year.
It seems Brooke has more in common with the alcoholic SFTV Taylor than Sheila realizes, including also having a family with Ridge. Sheila forgot about R.J. Speaking of kids, Sheila conceived Diana during an anonymous one-night stand with a stranger (Massimo Marone). And she also had one by the married Jack. So, truth be told, that makes Sheila a Slut from Michigan.
The last week of 2021 set up some pretty heavy storms in the lives of most characters featured this week, and the best way to cover it all might be to dole out some much-needed advice to each character, one-by-one, before the fallout ensues. At this point, even the kiddies could use some guidance going into the new year.
Taylor, stop being second and stop being Sheila's weakest link
Dear Tay-Tay, I don't know what's on your mind to think you can just indefinitely "observe Sheila." This ain't Silence of the Lambs, and you are not Clarice. Didn't you get enough of observing Sheila as you lay on the floor, bleeding out, watching Brooke get shot, too? Regardless of good intentions, one moment on Christmas Eve is a lifetime pain in the ass.
Case in point -- that prickly cactus gift from Sheila. It symbolizes the pain in the ass I'm talking about. It's already stuck Kelly, and I think that's a symbol of how Sheila might strike you and your family if you don't keep up the hospitable behavior. I know one thing: you need to figure out how Sheila found your office and why she isn't currently on your patient list. You almost might take Kelly to the hospital just in case those cactus needles were dipped in mind-control juice.
My advice, Tay-Tay, is to forget Sheila. Let Ridge and Steffy handle her like they've been doing. Meanwhile, girl, go on and let your hair down -- or take your wig off -- whatever the case is. Focus on yourself and stop living in the past. It's not like you know the truth about it, anyway. I mean "the truth," not "your truth" that you make up to justify being number two to Ridge.
There's no mistaking it. You are number two. When he thinks of Brooke at New Year's Eve, he thinks of romance. When he thinks of you at New Year's Eve, he thinks of a card game. Instead of denying you need a man, get over the man and appreciate being single like Paris. When Ridge comes around, using you like he did Shauna, slam the door in his face.
Brooke, Steffy and her family are not worth dying for!
Brooke, Brooke, Brooke. Girl. I know you are married, and you love your stepkids. You are fierce, and you ain't afraid of anything. I get it. But Steffy and her stinking little family are not worth dying for -- or losing your husband or sobriety for. I'm telling you right now, Steffy doesn't give a damn about you. In fact, she talks about you like a dog to her mama, her brother, and her father, too. To anyone who'll listen, frankly. She's trying to undermine your marriage, and you're just handing out free ammunition to do it.
You better stop giggling and drinking with Deacon and open your eyes, Logan, or I'll be the only one calling you that in 2022. If I were you, I'd invest in some intuition-colored glasses, because you suck at being able to tell the difference between obvious things, like men and sobriety levels. Also, when your intuition tells you something, act on it. Deacon should have been out of there one bellbottom-jeans-story ago as far as I'm concerned.
I hate that this happened to you, but you better tell Ridge the whole truth right away. Just say, "Oops, looks like Deacon and I pulled a Ridge and Shauna." That should do the trick and shut Ridge up. And next time, Brooke, go to Paris with your husband. You never know how much time you have left with Ridge while Taylor's on the prowl and Sheila's after you.
Sheila, stop being obvious
Sheila, you know what you did, and I hope you know that's why you're alone on New Year's Eve and will be alone every New Year's Eve until you stop obsessing over the wrong BFFs! You had to know it was suspicious when Steffy smacked the taste out of your mouth and threw you out of her house, but the woman you shot thinks you should come right on over. You think Taylor is so good, and Taylor is so kind, but how will you feel when you learn she is simply playing "Clarice and Hannibal" with you and your life?
And what's with this cactus and all this gushing about Taylor? She let you in one time just to analyze you. While you were praising her for it, she was probably wondering how you figured out where her brand-new office is when she had to GPS it herself. Why did you bring Taylor a gift and not your grandchild at Christmas? Sheila, you're obvious and too eager about this thing with Taylor. My advice to you is to slow your roll before you wind up poisoning people with mercury on behalf of yet another bestie that doesn't love you back.
Ah, but what does Sheila know about friendship, anyway? She calls Deacon her only friend, but look at how she tried to expose their relationship to Brooke, even after he's told Sheila a dozen times that he can't be seen with her. She wants to turn his life-long crush back into a lush, and she used his job to accomplish it. That's not what friends are for, Sheila.
Ridge, remember all the times Brooke forgave you
Ridge, you made me swoon when you rushed in, talking about that glamorous Paris trip and suggesting Brooke try gowns on in flight. That was classic Ridge Forrester, and I think you need to stop being so grumpy and get back to that before all your yelling gives you ED. Justin can handle Deacon, Sheila, and Quinn. Remember, the Switzerland slopes won't ski themselves.
And before you get angry and feel all divorcy with your wife, remember all the times Brooke has forgiven you and taken you back without lording over you the mistakes you made. Remember that she forgave you for Katie, for Quinn, and for Shauna, and that's all been only within the last decade. Sheila violated Brooke's sobriety, and she's gonna need you to stand by her, not lecture her, leave her, or compare her to Taylor, who really wasn't any kind of prize when you remarried her back in 2006. Don't believe me? Then, next, remember Hector and James.
Deacon, you're a delusional, functional alcoholic
"Fall off the wagon one night and get back on," you joked, but Deacon, I assure you it's not funny. You are an alcoholic. You need help. Anyone stupid enough to dream about being with Hope and Brooke but blow it for a drunken night of kissing, or whatever you guys wind up doing, isn't worth the second chance that I or Hope was willing to give you. I'm disgusted with you for not stopping Brooke from breaking out the vodka and not calling Hope to get her some help.
My advice to you, Deacon, is to learn what it means to protect your family, because this ain't it. You are not worthy if this is what you do -- gamble it all on a drunken night. How shortsighted. You might wish you hadn't taught Hope martial arts because she might roundhouse you in the nuts for helping her mom fall off the wagon. Oh, and by the way, Sheila ain't your friend, dude. Stop letting her slum around you because she's ruining the best chance you ever had.
Liam and Hope, keep a better eye on your kids and alcoholic parents
I have one question for you, Hope. Why did you let your alcoholic father drink real Champagne in front of you? If you care about your father so much, how about you help him stay sober? And it wouldn't hurt to give him a Christmas gift, either. Don't be rude next year.
Liam, I know you were preparing for "sexy time, sexy time," but you can't half-ass parent. You knew Douglas wouldn't accept any substitute bunnies in his bed any more than you would -- while sober, at least. My advice is, next time, take the walk up to the main house. You could have saved Brooke a disastrous night and prevented Douglas from being scarred for life.
How hard did you look for that rabbit, really? I saw two rabbits in that very room. Here's one last bit of advice: If you're gonna shortcut parenting, fit your front door with childproof locks.
Douglas, don't you tell it!
Darling Douglas, you're a staunch believer in honesty being the best policy. That's what your mama taught you and why Mommy Hope got Beth back. However...being honest doesn't mean you have to volunteer information you see. Now, you saw Grandma kissing Santa Claus. It was exciting, but I advise you to take the "don't ask, don't tell" approach with this news -- unless you never want to live with Mommy Hope again, that is, because your grandma Tay-Tay is gonna use this to rip you right out of your happy home. And, boy, it wouldn't hurt to spend one holiday with your dad! You're O-for-three. Don't you love him more than Peanut Butter, the rabbit?
Carter, not another taken woman
Carter, I thought you learned your lesson. Unless -- is this payback for Zende trying to text Zoe out of an engagement with you? It is, isn't it? Look, I'll give you the advice you gave yourself about Katie. Leave those unavailable women alone! Damn, man. She already told you she doesn't want marriage or a serious commitment. She's not what you want. I implore you not to fall for the Buckingham sisters' "damsel in relationship distress" act again.
Zende, come to terms with your divorce
Zende, why do you want to rush into marriage? You barely know Paris, especially if you don't know she doesn't want to rush into marriage. Look, you just got divorced a year back. You haven't even told us why it happened, so I know you aren't over it. Why don't you come to terms with that -- on-screen -- and maybe next time, don't give a woman so many mixed signals, either. One moment, you're hot, the next moment, you back off, and the third moment, you propose. It makes a girl's head spin in a bad way. And if you think you just did a big, over-the-top proposal for Paris, clearly you forgot how you proposed to Nicole with a horse-drawn carriage.
Paris, you did the right thing
Paris, my advice is you did the right thing, and you looked good doing it. You're independent. You don't need a man to feed you. You aren't ready for marriage, not with all these sexy men surrounding you. Don't choose, just cruise until you find the right one -- which ain't Carter, just so you know. He's fine and everything, but uh-uh. Stay away. Is Justin too old for you? Maybe?
Speaking of Justin, did he ever give Ridge a follow-up report on Deacon and Sheila? And what about the other plots left dangling in the last days of the year, like Thomas' crush on Paris or whether Carter ever took that restraining order out on Sheila? Let's turn our attention to some loose ends in 2021 that I'd love to see resolved in 2022.
Will Bill and Katie reunite?
This question has lingered since 2020, actually, and despite Bill begging Brooke to help him, it's still going nowhere. We saw a glimmer of a new relationship forming between Carter and Katie, but that seemed to fall apart the moment she dropped him to spend time with Bill and Will. In 2022, I demand to see more Bill Spencer and to know if it will be Batie or Cartie.
Is Thomas living out of his car?
When Thomas' proposal to Paris about hooking up bombed, Thomas moved out. But where did he go? He's not at the mansion or living at Brooke's house. Maybe he's experiencing the car life? I think before Taylor raises a stink about Douglas seeing inappropriate kisses at the anti-grandma's house, in 2022, his dad should find a stable home for Douglas.
Is Justin still spying on Sheila?
Remember when Ridge told Justin to spy on Deacon and Sheila and report back? So far, there has been nothing to report, I guess. But if Justin is still following her, could he hold key information about why Brooke fell off the sobriety wagon? In 2022, I'm looking forward to this loose end being tied up by Justin reporting that, from her balcony or window (via his Spiderman legs or binoculars), he saw Sheila switching bottle labels in her hotel room. Or will he walk into Brooke's bedroom, announcing, "Busted?"
Where is Sheila getting all of her money?
This question has puzzled many fans since Sheila's return. She really shouldn't mock Deacon for working at Il Giardino because that's the same place that gave her a chance when she got out of prison. It didn't make her a millionaire, though, so how is she able to support herself and Deacon, too, living the expensive hotel life? I'd like 2022 to reveal that Sheila is using money that she amassed back in 2003 when she was a terrorist in South America.
Did Eric overcome ED?
According to Eric, mistletoe hangs all over the house. When she presented Zende with the ring for Paris, Quinn apologized for the delay, but she'd had to get her life in order. Does that mean Queric has overcome their stimulation problem? If so, I'd like it to also mean that Donna can have her half of the receptionist desk back, and Quinn drops the petty act in 2022.
Are Finn and Steffy legally married yet?
In the fall, a big to-do was made of the fact that Steffy and Finn had never gotten around to filing their marriage certificate at the courthouse. Not only do viewers not know why the couple had time for everything except that, but we also never found out if the marriage was legalized. Was this an oversight by the writers, or will 2022 reveal that Steffy's marriage isn't legal, opening the door for the return of the dreaded Hope/Liam/Steffy triangle?
Spoilers indicate that Ridge is baffled by Brooke's New Year's Eve behavior, but Brooke remains tight-lipped. Deacon becomes unwelcome in her house, forcing Hope to see him in secret. Brooke struggles with telling Ridge the truth. She'd better tell Ridge before Douglas does. That's all I know. Look for Brooke to take her first steps to deal with her alcoholism.
Taylor becomes leery of Sheila's hatred toward Brooke. Zende brings someone special to town for Paris. Paris tells Carter why she kissed him -- duh, because he's fine; that's why.
Thanks again for getting the two scoops with me, and until we scoop again, I've got some advice for you, too. Be smarter than Liam, Macy, Brooke, Hope, and Deacon, every one of whom has had their drinks spiked. Never turn your back on your drinks, and don't take drinks from people you don't know or trust. Here's to a bold and beautiful new year, baby!
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