The magnificent molars

by Tony
For the Week of July 29, 2013
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DAYS Two Scoops: The magnificent molars
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The week of July 29, 2013
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Could a set of old false teeth mean the return of a whacky weirdo from days gone by? Also, Adrienne couldn't stop herself from flapping her gums, and Will also opened up and said an awful lot to Justin. And it was like pulling teeth for Rafe to get answers from his loved ones. Open up and say 'Ahh' for this week's Two Scoops!

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I couldn't help but listen to The Smiths' song "Bigmouth Strikes Again" on repeat as I wrote my column this week. I mean, really! Why couldn't Adrienne just keep her yap shut? Oh, right. Because she's NuAdrienne -- same sassy hairstyles, same amazing actress, but an entirely new character! With her superior mindset, I'd say this version could leap tall buildings in a single bound, but she'd probably get too distracted making sure the building is structurally sound in case her Sonny Boy wants go inside. Cut those apron strings, Adrienne. Snip, snip!

Still, I'm not that mad at NuAdrienne, if you can believe that. Why, you might ask? Well, because we got some insane, Sweeps-like drama and a boatload of great acting out of Adrienne's need to protect Sonny. The entire scenes played out perfectly, and encompassed nearly the entire cast -- who all shined in their performances, mind you -- and those are things I always I enjoy.

Actually, this storyline is all-encompassing, if you think about it. There's hardly a character that isn't involved somehow, directly or indirectly. That's rather brilliant. Even characters like Abe, Kayla, and Roman have been dusted off and trotted out for show. Of course, Justin being front and center is amazing! I've been crusading for more Wally Kurth screen-time for a very, very long time. Well played, writers. Well played.

And to make things even more delicious, this storyline is like Wrestlemania. Years' worth of storylines are coming together for an epic showdown. Will shooting E.J. is being revisited again. E.J.'s coop is there. It has a peppering of the DiMera/Brady Vendetta. Heck, even Rafe's attack and those characters are being looped in. Aside from poor, ill-treated, and neglected Jeannie-Theresa, I can't think of a character who's not involved in some way, shape, or form.

Of course, at the core, this storyline is focusing on Sami and Will's misdeeds. Everyone else is either supporting one or both of them -- or scowling at them. That includes Melinda Trask, who's a total bitch on wheels. I kind of like her. She's very direct and no-nonsense. Sure, D.A. Woods would have been an interesting choice for the part of a Sami lynch mob ringleader, considering his love for all things DiMera-related, but I'll give Melinda a chance. I'm actually afraid not to. She's a bit scary.

So, Sami and Will! Alison Sweeney and Chandler Massey are hitting this out of the park. They're at the wheel. Things will continue to be amazing. I have no doubts. Their characters, on the other hand, well, that's a different story.

There's only a narrow chance this can play out without all of Sami, Will, and company's secrets spilling out. In fact, some of them have already spilled. Will told Justin about shooting E.J. Yes, please! This ensures Justin will continue to be on-screen, among other things. Oh, and a very scary, determined E.J. promised to get things done the way he used to. Yes, this is going to be legendary.

My biggest concern, however, is that this storyline does have a few flaws. Mainly, the assassination of Adrienne's true character. Is watching such a huge storyline worth that? I'm teetering on this one. I do know that I'm enjoying the drama. I'm loving the performances! And can't wait to see what happens next. Plus, it's making Sami happy. She got to be the center of attention, after all.

Sure, Kristen's a criminal. She drugged a priest, raped him, videoed the entire thing, and was going to play it at his crowning moment. Does that really make her so mean, mean, mean? Yeah, I can't even support her in this one. It's pretty reprehensible. There's a special place in hell for her. But that's old news.

The new news is that Brady and Kristen are rekindling their affair. You know, if Kristen can manage to keep her latest crimes from being exposed. This led her to dig in the DiMera dungeon for an old standby cure-all -- Susan Banks's false teeth! Seriously!? Are we going there? This doesn't disappoint. Here's why.

Like Wile E. Coyote going back to check on an unexploded stick of dynamite, you know this scheme will eventually blow up in Kristen's face. So why not have some laughs and get some throwbacks in the process? I already enjoyed the vintage flashback! This storyline need not be stretched out, but I'm okay with some randomness in the process, and I have all the faith in the world false teeth that Eileen will continue to helm it brilliantly.

Oh, goodness. Now Jeannie-T is all hot and bothered for Dr. Dan. I hope he's getting money from the town's visitor's bureau. He has to be on a pamphlet somewhere. He seems to be on the Salem "Must Do" list behind shopping at the Horton Town Square, dinning at Chez Rouge, and seeing the plaque at Make-out Mountain where the Gemini Twin's spaceship crashed. Well, at least he's not statutory, like J.J. There's that.

In breaking news, Rafe ate some Jell-O. He also wigged out a bit about Sami. And he got to meet his niece for the first time. The last part was actually cute. The rest? Well, it was good naptime.

You know, part of me actually wants to see another book club meeting. Who would have thought after everything they've been through together, Nicole and Jennifer would be casually discussing Alice's Adventures in Wonderland in the middle of the pub. Not me!

On the topic of Jennifer and Nicole, here's an idea. Let them team up and start an investigative reporter talk show. They've both done reporting and TV, so it could be a win/win. Among other things, they could even investigate Salem's newest drug circle. That would sure lead to some Must-See-TV!

Last month, our Summer of Sinners series focused on some hunky henchmen and guest-star baddies. This month we're focusing on those saucy sinners, otherwise known as the "Wicked Hot Witches and Short-Lived Villainesses!" These ladies are not to be crossed. So if you're feeling brave enough, be sure to check out our two-part blog. Click here for Part One, and then either follow the link at the bottom of the blog, or click here for Part Two As always, be sure to add your two cents in the comment section, or Tweet us with your thoughts! Good luck and safe travels!

Extra Scoops

Last week was just sensational all around for the most part! Some of the highlights that made choosing one "Hot" nearly impossible were: the cuteness of Eric, Sami, Roman, Marlena, Caroline, and other family members celebrating Eric's achievements; the awesomeness of E.J. standing beside his lady as well as the awesomeness of Mar Mar supporting Sami; and the hilarious banter between Victor and Nicole (sans my "Not." See below!). I forgot how much fun John Aniston and Ari Zucker are together! Great job, cast and crew. Great job!

Oh, Nicole! Jennifer might be too square for a martinithon, but come over and sit next to me. We need to talk and drink. So, I love you, but you should never, ever take a newfound high road and slam others for getting away with murder. Ever. There's a surly Greek tycoon, a bathtub, an electrical device, a girl in a coma, and a guy named Colin Murphy that might argue that you got away with murder, too. Twice! Sure, the victims didn't remain dead, but that wasn't for a lack of trying. So, shhhh.

Will (to Marlena): "Seriously, John is acting like a bad word."
Preach it, Young William!

Honorable Mention
Ciara: "I love weddings! When I grow up, can I get married as many times as Sami?"

Well, hello, Kristian Alfonso looking all shades of amazing in green!

Speaking of amazing, how great are Judi Evans and Freddie Smith together!?

Hats off to you, James Scott! Like Adrienne, I was afraid of him, too, when he came a knockin'. Brilliant showing, old chap.

I love you more each week, Maxine.

I'm really digging the new sets built for St. Luke's Academy.

Why, hello, Mason Ventura. Yes, please!

I fully support Chad and Sonny's new venture! Mocha-flavored martinis, anyone?

Not to sound like a jerk -- I'll wait for the thunderous simultaneous cry of "Too late!" to end -- but I think I've seen Marge grieve more for Joe than we saw Jennifer grieve for Jack. Just saying.

I had to put on sunglasses after seeing Brent's bright hipster pants.

Have you been making the DAYS 2013 calendar your desktop background so far this year? I'm kind of still stuck on April.

Oh, darn. Nick and Gabi are officially annulled. Is it too late to get my wedding gift back? I had a feeling they weren't going to use that his and hers set of common sense I got them anyway.

Why I love Kristen Example 5,655: She's a planner. Instead of keeping key chains and sappy souvenirs from past lovers, she keeps false teeth and knit hats in case she ever has to don a disguise again. Smart thinking!

So, friends and fellow DAYS fans, that's Two Scoops for the week of July 29. Since my mom is the reason I got so addicted to DAYS, I'd like to publicly wish her a very happy birthday! She's pretty super and has even started supporting EJami. For a Rafe fan, I'd say that's progress and something to celebrate! Now, as Laurisa will be in Chicago on business next week, I'll be back to Scoop again then. Salemites, beware. And "That's a fact!"

As always, thanks for reading!

Need more Two Scoops? Head over to read blogs by Laurisa or Tony for more ranting, raving, and all-out randomness

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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