Dear readers, I hate Peter August. I didn't used to hate Peter. When he first arrived on the scene, I wanted him to be able to be redeemed. But that never fully happened. He's a psycho. Thus, now I loathe him with a burning passion. I want someone to murder him -- like now.
In real life, I'd just want him to go to jail because I'm a non-violent hippie sort of girl. But in GH soapland, he has to die because he'd just get out if he went to prison, and I can't have that. I hate Peter so much that I won't watch anything Wes Ramsey is in for a really long time. But that says he's a compelling actor!
For example, I couldn't watch Danny Glover in anything after seeing him in The Color Purple. He was just so good at being evil in that role that I reacted when I saw him. But then he did Angels in the Outfield in 1994, and he was so good at being good that I allowed myself to love him again. The Color Purple was made in 1985, and Angels was created in 1994, so it took me about a decade to get over how much I hated a character he played. I know that's a little obsessive.
So, here's my advice to Wes Ramsey: book yourself a happy Disney movie or a Hallmark Christmas movie -- and fast! You have an in. Your soap brother Nathan made the dreamiest Christmas Hallmark movie of last season. Maybe he will overlook the fact that you go to his grave and taunt him about how you're banging his widow. Peter. Yuck.
I have come to despise Peter so much because the GH writers refuse to wrap up this storyline. Peter just keeps doing terrible thing after terrible thing, and it never ends. Anna, Robert, Valentin, Finn, Maxie, Britt, Sam, Jason, and a host of others are onto Peter and trying to take him down, but they just can't seem to get the drop on him. It's too much. Please, writers, take pity on us and end this.
Rumor has it that Roger Howarth is coming back next week. Wouldn't it be swell if he was still Franco? Let's imagine that Franco worked with Jason to fake his death. The corpse we saw had one of those creepy masks on, like when Faison pretended to be Duke. Franco went looking for Drew and found him being held on some remote island. The two compared fractured memories and put together that Peter is a psycho. They arrive back in Port Charles together with guns blazing and take Peter out. They are hailed as heroes, and there is a big parade! (I tried to get hired as a GH writer once; shit like this is probably why I didn't get the gig.)
Some of you will hate me for saying this, but I loved Sam with Drew back in the day, and if he came home, Sam could go back to Drew, and then Britt can have a turn with Jason. Plus, I just really miss Billy Miller's face.
Next up, let's talk about something I really loved last week, although I saw some discussion online that it was controversial. Racism. White privilege. Cops treating white suspects differently than they do black suspects. How can this be controversial? There are statistics galore to back this up. Here is one quick link, but just go to Google and search, and you will find plenty more.
I worked for an incredible man who wrote a book in 2018 called The Third Option about racial divides in the US and how to heal them. It's filled with unique ways that we can bridge the divide and heal our nation.
It's the most meaningful project I have ever worked on in my life. One of the tasks on my plate was to track the news for instances of racial injustice. By the end of the eight months or so that I followed this, I had a Google doc spreadsheet that would make you weep. It had the story of the police being called on two black men for wanting to use the bathroom at a Starbucks to a host of others too numerous to list.
We had a large staff of a couple of hundred people, and one day, we took an entire day just to sit and tell our stories. We broke up into tables with the directive to "sit with someone who doesn't look like you." So, at each table, we had a mix of Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, and other people. One question was, "What happens when a cop pulls you over for speeding." The White people said, "The cop comes up to the window and says, 'May I see your license and registration?'" The Black people said, "The cop comes up to the window and says, 'Do you have drugs or guns in the car?'" Now mind you, this was a church, and my coworkers were pastors. And they all had stories to back this up. When I expressed shock that this had happened to them, they laughed. I had to acknowledge that I am white and privileged, and I had never encountered that before.
Meanwhile, all the people of color in the room had experienced that sort of thing firsthand throughout their lifetimes. The conversation GH initiated is necessary. We all need to see the world through another lens and realize that not everyone experiences the world the same way we do.
Soap operas are no strangers to controversy or hot topics. GH has taken on AIDS (Robin and Stone), gay marriage and adoption (Brad and Lucas), transgender people (Dr. Terry), and now racial bias (Cameron, Trina, Jordan, and Portia). GH has educated its viewers on mental illness, drug addiction, cancer, heart disease, and so much more.
The best entertainment is also impactful. It makes you think. It makes you look at the world through another lens. This week's scenes between Jordan and Portia, discussing how they fear for their children and coach them about how to maneuver the world, rang true. It mirrors what many of my friends have told me about the talks they have with their children. Bravo to GH and Briana Nicole Henry, Brook Kerr, Sydney Mikayla, and William Lipton for these meaningful and powerful scenes. Thanks for getting America talking and thinking about racial inequality in policing. You were all incredible.
Now, on to less controversial topics. Doesn't Dante clean up nice? Not that I didn't appreciate scruffy Dante, but clean-shaven Dante coming out of the shower was a "Wow!" moment for me. Lulu better hurry up and come out of that coma soon, or some other honey will try to win his heart.
I'm glad Dante is back in action. As you may recall from my last column, I lamented the lack of police in Port Charles, so having one more cop on the streets is an excellent thing. Of course, his first case was to find Jason, but he was thwarted by Fair Samantha, as Spinelli calls her.
I've noticed many GH viewers whining about Sam not being a more significant part of Jason's storyline. Let's not forget that Sam's child was nearly killed in an explosion meant to kill Jason. Sam made the conscious decision to step away from Jason and his mob life. The writers are true to the character's choice by keeping Sam on the sidelines. That's what her decision looks like. It means she can't be on the run with Jason, and she has to stay home and be a mom to her children.
On the other hand, Britt feels she has nothing to lose and everything to gain by running with Jason versus going back to Port Charles to be murdered by Cyrus. Readers, I miss the days of fun villains. Helena was a fun villain. Obrecht was a fun villain. Heather was a fun villain. But both Cyrus and Peter are just evil, and there is no joy in watching them terrorize people. Gladys is an annoying villain because she is just such an idiot. She's playing a game with a ruthless drug lord, and Brando will most likely end up without a mom because Cyrus will end her as soon as he has no more use for her.
Is there any chance that Sasha will carry her baby to term? It would be an ironic twist if Sasha gave up Michael because she wasn't ready to be a mom to Wiley, only to end up pregnant and be a mother herself. At least we don't have to worry that her baby will get swapped with Maxie's baby because Maxie has been pregnant for a year and a half, and Sasha has only been pregnant for five minutes.
Brook Lynn and Maxie feel confident they have their baby swap scam set, but they are unaware there is a spy in their midst, Chloe Jennings. Or whatever her real name is, since Chloe Jennings is probably sleeping with the fishes now. Is this chick even actually a nurse or some goon? We have no idea.
One of the most touching scenes was Ned singing to Brook Lynn's fake baby belly. The original song he and his wife wrote for this scene was just so beautiful and tender. I always enjoy it when Wally Kurth can share his beautiful voice with us. Seeing Brook Lynn tear up was very moving. It seemed to make her wish that she was actually pregnant and really about to make Ned a grandpa.
Think about the fact that if Brook Lynn brings Maxie's baby home. Ned, Olivia, Monica, and the entire Q clan will rally around this infant girl and love and spoil her completely. Until the day the coast is clear, and Maxie comes to take back her baby and breaks all of their hearts. I am already crying.
Side note, since William Lipton is also a gifted singer, next Nurses Ball, Cam and Ned should definitely do a duet.
Over in Nixon Falls, "Mike" and Nina cooked up a scheme to try to find out what Elijah was up to, but by the end of Friday's episode, Nina was busted. I fully expect "Mike" to kick into "Sonny" mode and come to Nina's rescue, guns blazing. I can't help but wonder if Elijah knows who Sonny is or suspects who he is on some level. He's way too interested in a random amnesiac bartender, if you ask me. While I really enjoyed seeing Maurice Benard get to try on a new (cowboy) hat and switch gears for a while, I am ready for him to get back to Port Charles to save Carly from herself. Can you imagine Ava and Carly teaming up to head the Five Families? Yikes.
Some of you are mad at Jax for calling Carly out on her current activities. But I think Jax is right. All these years, Carly has maintained that she has to be willing to put her life and her kids' lives in danger daily because of her great love for Sonny. But now, Sonny is gone. She could, as Jax suggested, run a five-star hotel and Sonny's legitimate coffee business and let the mob do whatever it's going to do. Her kids would be safe, she would be safe, and they could live a happy, affluent life, crime-free. Jason could ask Brando for a job at the garage and go home to Sam and his kids. Or go to the police academy and become a cop, since he's so good at shooting and detective work. But instead, Carly decided to step up and take over Sonny's mob life. Jax is concerned for Josslyn, Avery, and Donna's safety. Why is he wrong to say so?
Alexis and Shawn just get to hang out all day in the prison library and chat. I mean, it really doesn't seem so bad, right? At least Alexis convinced Shawn to fight for his freedom. However, if he confesses all because he thinks Sonny is dead, will Nikolas go to jail for Hayden's shooting?
I think Carly would be thrilled to employ Shawn, should he be released from jail. I mean, if he was innocent, he wouldn't be on parole, right?
Next up. Willow and Michael. Someone explain why they can't be together at home. Chase is in the hospital. If Willow pretends to be his babe while he's sick, fine. But why can't she go home at night and ravage Michael? Who would know? I don't get it.
What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Bobbie end up alone in Beecher's Corners, waiting for Maxie, who is being forced to give birth at GH, and Brook Lynn, who is being guarded at the Q mansion by Valentin, Yuri, and Charlotte? Will Roger Howarth come back as Todd Manning, Drew Cain, Franco Baldwin, or someone totally new? Will Britt Westbourne discover her trembling hands are due to too much caffeine and being a fugitive instead of Huntington's disease? Will Sonny come home and send cousin Gladys on a long ride to the Pine Barrons?
Will Sasha's baby be Brando's or Michael's? Will Diane give up lawyering to become Avery's nanny? Will Jason realize he can never, ever go along with one of Carly's harebrained schemes again? Will Jax kidnap Josslynn and fly her to Australia? Will Nikolas be a good prison warden at the newly acquired Pentonville? Will Lucy design a new line of Deception maternity wear? Will Cameron ever find out that Dev faked Joss's journal entry and that she really loved kissing him?
Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.
What are your thoughts on General Hospital? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- and there are many ways you can share your thoughts.