Summertime, and the lovin' is easy

For the Week of July 7, 2014
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Y&R Two Scoops: Summertime, and the lovin' is easy
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Summer in the city took a romantic turn as Hilary and Neil tied the knot in Chancellor Park, Summer and Austin eloped to the courthouse, Nick and Sharon vowed everlasting love, Cane and Lily spent a weekend in Paris, and Jill and Colin finally confided in each other. At Genoa City Memorial Hospital, the livin' was less than easy as Dylan took a detour on the road to recovery. At the Athletic Club, Devon fueled his frustration with alcohol while Courtney and Noah canoodled by the pool.

Summer set off fireworks early on the Fourth when she announced her marriage to Austin and declared her independence to Jack. I don't know about you, but I did not see that one coming, so I was impressed, and naturally more interested in the story. Summer proved that she isn't as dumb as she's been acting lately because she was plenty smart enough to snap up the only guy in town that's hot, not too old for her, and not a relative. Way to go, Summer! If you had waited any longer, Abby would have scooped Austin up for her mom (Just kidding!)

Jack's reaction was priceless as his overprotectiveness went into hyperdrive. (Funny, I don't remember Jack treating his sons that way, although it is certainly how he treats his sisters!) I have no doubt that we will see Jack become just as Machiavellian as Victor when Jack attempts to separate Summer from Austin. I don't doubt that Austin will have to contend with disdain from the Newman clan as well. Will Austin be man enough to withstand the onslaught? He certainly will for a while, but at some point, Jack, Victor, or Nick -- take your pick -- will convince him that for Summer's own good, Austin has to take the money and run.

Summer will stop him. They will face the music together. Either Leslie will find a legal loophole, or Paul will forgive Austin; Avery will speak on Austin's behalf, and the slate will be cleared. Austin will either get probation or spend ten minutes behind bars. It's likely that Nick will then hire Austin at the Underground, since he likes to keep an eye on all the family felons. Summer had better watch out, though, Mariah might be able to seduce Austin away. It's great that Summer is finally getting a story of her own.

I did notice that Austin got significantly laxer treatment from the courts for nearly killing the chief of police than Fen did for allegedly killing an escaped convict. Fen had to wear an ankle monitor, and Austin, with no ties to the community, made bail and is free to do as he pleases. Maybe it was a good thing for Austin that Christine was an emotional mess sobbing over Paul instead of prosecuting Paul's attacker.

Nothing unusual happened in the Neil-Hilary-Devon triangle. As expected, Neil and Hilary tied the knot despite Devon's declaration of love for Hilary. In stereotypical soap fashion, the hero waited too long to declare his love, and the heroine, desperate to believe that she had moved on and could truly love another, rejected the dejected hero and proceeded to marry her doomed clueless groom.

Hilary wants to believe that she loves Neil, but she is mistaking one kind of love for another. Now that Neil has said that he does not want to have a child right away, I expect that Devon and Hilary will declare their love for each other and just before they are about to tell Neil, Hilary will find out that she is pregnant. I also expect a lot more fireworks out of Lily, who could stay in Paris for a while longer, as far as I'm concerned!

I am definitely a big fan of the actress who plays Hilary. I think she is one of the prettiest women on the show. Yes I am shallow, but I own it. Besides, the woman can act. She is as convincing as the dewy-eyed bride fresh off the farm as she was as a heartless, vindictive vixen. I still don't know which one is real. Well as real as an imaginary friend can be. Maybe this Hilary has an evil twin in an alternate soap reality...

Nick, Noah, and Faith are growing closer to Mariah. It won't be long until that branch of the Newman clan is restored. It's a good thing that Sharon does not want to get married to Nick again because Phyllis is about to recover, and when she returns, Sharon's secret is bound to explode. (Did she or didn't she? The answer at last and the real test of Nick's love.) There is no doubt that, from our side of the TV screen, we saw Sharon do horrible things while in the grip of a terrible soap opera illness. We have to ask ourselves, is Sharon's behavior forgivable?

My answer is a resounding, "Yes." We forgave Phyllis for a lot worse, because we liked Phyllis, despite her sometimes hurtful behavior toward others. Phyllis did not have the excuse of mental illness. If Nick's forgiveness, ECT, and medication can give us back original Sharon and the happy family she shared with Nick, then I'm all for it. Not only are Nick and Sharon one of the hottest couples on Y&R, they are one of the very best couples in daytime drama, and I want more, no matter what I have to believe to make it so, even if I have to hop in a time machine and go! Memo to self: Repeat three times, "It's only a soap!"

Noah and Courtney are still cute together, plus they give Summer and Austin another couple to hang with. I'm sorry that they dropped the undercover story with Courtney, but hopefully she will get to do more police work with Paul and the rest of the Keystone Kops. I'm trying to imagine Kevin as a rival to Noah for her affections, but the vibes aren't there -- maybe a buddy comedy instead.

Speaking of Paul, let me say right now, if I ever need medical attention of any kind, do not, I repeat, do not send me to Genoa City Memorial, or more aptly, "The Hospital of Horrors." They had less equipment in ICU than I have in my bedroom. And where were the doctors and nurses who are supposed to monitor those machines and therefore know that a patient has disconnected his monitors and is wandering aimlessly around the halls in search of a wheelchair?

The set looked like it belonged in a 1950s version of The Twilight Zone, not in a major, supposedly state-of-the-art, hospital in a small town populated by several millionaires and billionaires. Surely Devon, Victor, Jack, Abby -- to name a few -- could spare a few million to buy equipment and hire staff. I think it would be a much better use of Devon's time and resources than standing drunkenly on a precarious precipice pitching hundred dollar bills from his perch on the roof of the Athletic Club, in a pitiful bid for Hilary's attention.

Ooh, ooh, thought of another question: how many ICUs does an average hospital have? Does each floor have one? How far apart were Paul and Dylan's rooms? It sure seemed to take Nikki a long time to get to Paul's room after she left Dylan's room. In fact, it seemed like it took Dylan less time to heave himself out of bed, find a wheelchair and take himself to Paul's room than it took Nikki to locate Christine. I also wondered how Dylan managed to get into Paul's room without anyone noticing, especially eagle-eyed Christine, who finally showed her true colors.

No disrespect to Laura Lee Bell, and I loved Cricket, but I can't stand Christine, who seems like a smug, self-righteous control freak. Yes, I know, I should cut her some slack because her husband was in critical condition, but I didn't like how she freaked out and let her jealousy show. Christine holds herself and everyone else to a higher standard. Her selfishness with Nikki shows an insecurity that is not attractive in Christine.

I wonder how much longer Paul and Christine's marriage will last once Christine realizes that she is not going to be part of the Dylan-Paul-Nikki love fest. I am enjoying this story, even though it is predictable. It was fitting that Dylan's detour to Limbo began with Sully urging Dylan to let go and ended with Paul encouraging Dylan to hang on and guiding Dylan back to recovery. I did predict a heaven scene last column, and I was not disappointed. The only thing that continues to disappoint me is that horrible red hair on Dylan. Brown it down or blonde it up, but please, get rid of the red.

Victor was very supportive of Nikki and has done a 180 in his feelings about Dylan. In some ways, I wish Dylan had been Victor's son. They could wear their matching leather jackets and mumble in monosyllables. Dylan could be Victor's mini-me. It could still end up that way. Dylan might be more interesting as Victor's enforcer and cohort than as a good-natured coffee shop owner and lovable son of the police chief.

I still expect Nikki and Paul to end up together at some point, even if it doesn't last -- so watch out, Victor and Christine, and don't say I didn't warn you! Will your nemeses be Ma and Pa Kettle or the Yokams of Dogpatch?

I liked how Jill handled her relationship with Colin and let him prove his love to her, and then she proved hers for him. I don't like it that she scamming the insurance company, but I assume that it will somehow come back to bite her. I'm one of those honest people, not because I'm high-minded but because I'm lazy, and I've found that it takes a lot less effort to be honest than it does to be dishonest.

I've also learned by experience that "karma" is a real thing, easily explained by the golden rule or Newton's third law of motion, " For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction." So, here is the gospel according to Boone: "Steal and you get stolen from; Lie and you get lied to. Be tactful when you can, otherwise just be calm and honest and hope for the best."

But I digress. A lot of you have complained about the character of Colin, and I admit he has a terrible background, but I can't help myself. I love Bad Boy-o Scorpio, and as long as Tristan Rodgers plays the part, I'll stay interested. I think that Colin and Jill play well off each other. They are happy. They laugh and enjoy themselves, plus I love the empowered Jill, and I hope that she and Colin have more adventures together.

Other currently cozy couples include Leslie and her hunky new husband, Dr. Barton. I like him and hope he gets a storyline, and I love that Leslie stood up to Ian Ward. Leslie is going to be busy defending Austin while Ian goes after Nikki in court. I have no doubt that Nikki will prevail. I suspect that the hunky doctor will soon meet up with someone from his past...

Jack and Kelly are happy for the moment, but Phyllis will not be comatose much longer, so that happiness won't last. Not to mention that learning that Stitch and Kelly are brother and sister is just the tip of the iceberg there. From previous Kelly quotes, we know that Ben murdered someone. We found out on Friday that Ben had "served his time." Whatever Ben did had nothing to do with the death of Kelly's son, occurred before Ben and Kelly were estranged, and was apparently the cause of that estrangement. Whose death did Ben cause? Their father's? Kelly's boyfriend?

Things do not bode well for Ben and Victoria's relationship. Ben vowed his undying love and promised that he was telling Victoria the truth, but Ben was lying. Victoria was correct when she said that she was exchanging one Billy for another. No intimate relationship can be completely satisfying if there is not complete trust and honesty on both sides. The reality is that if Ben cannot trust that Victoria will continue to love him after Victoria learns Ben's secrets, then Victoria does not love Ben and could never love Ben, even if his secret was never revealed because Victoria never knew the real Ben.

I'm wondering what will happen when Ashley returns to town. The heat pouring off Ben and Ashley last winter could have caused a heat wave in the arctic. Ben's relationship with Victoria pales by comparison. I hope Victoria is pregnant with Billy's baby instead of Ben's. Today, for the first time, I could accept NuNuBilly. I'm with the fans that preferred David Tom, but since I know he's not coming back, I can live with this one. He actually looks old enough to be with Victoria, and today they felt okay together.

I wonder if Victor will collude with Ben to change the DNA test -- it should be a lot easier for Ben than it was for Sharon -- to make it appear that Ben is the father of Vic's baby. The plan will fail, of course, when Ben falls for Ashley and confesses. Meanwhile, Billy has been drowning his sorrows with Chelsea, who gets pregnant days before Adam returns...

I noticed in Friday's episode that Adam's hands are being played by a hairy-handed actor. An actor whose initials are CM has hairy hands, if I recall correctly. I definitely hope he is not the NuAdam. I think the actor has a great flair for comedy, but I absolutely can't remember ever seeing the subtle nuances needed to play Adam believably. He did play opposite Melissa Clare Egan once upon a time, and I remember liking that pairing until MCE's character went nuts. So maybe he won't be terrible, if those were his hands.

Congratulations to The Young and the Restless on all their Emmy wins. The acting remains stellar, and that is as good a reason as any to tune in. I think that July sweeps is off to a great start, and I expect more high drama as Phyllis revives, Adam is resurrected, and Ashley returns home. We've got a lot of happy couples on the canvas right now. Romance has heartbreak on the run, and while it can't last, let's enjoy it for as long as it does, along with the summer sun and the fireworks that are sure to explode in Genoa City during the good old summertime!

Now for my favorite part!

YouScoops: Letters from the email bag

Share your thoughts below this column in the Comments section, post a message on the Soap Central message boards, or simply click here to submit Feedback. Your comments could wind up in a future column, like these! Check it out!

Pay up, Sharon
We don't care who plays Phyllis as long as what Sharon did is revealed. The fans are tired of Sharon getting away with and never having to pay for what she does. Why ruin a young girl (Summer's life) so that woman can have a man? -- FAYE

No payday for Phyllis
I'm surprised a fan would say Sharon's always getting away with doing things. I don't agree. That's what irritated me about Phyllis. She got away with a lot and would get a tap on the wrist. The only one who could see through Phyllis was Victor. -- ROBIN

Team Sharon all the way:
I am sick and tired of people complaining about Sharon never paying for her crimes. She pays every single day. She is on medication for the rest of her life and has to listen to lectures on what an awful, evil person she is nearly every time she leaves the house. Meanwhile, Victor tried to drive her even more nuts by hiring a young woman to sully the name of his dead granddaughter and that was after he married her to make his wife jealous, making zero effort to hide it either. She had a mental breakdown and lost the respect of nearly everyone. BUT she also worked hard to get better and to earn the respect of those around her. You can't say Victor or Phyllis has ever had to do that. The King of Cruel and the Queen of Bitterness blame anyone but themselves for their problems and always come out smelling like roses. They never have to earn back respect people just forgive them for doing NOTHING! I am so ticked Phyllis is coming back as I HATED her character. ... I am hoping Gina T will make her a little less bitter harpy and a little more layered. -- DENICE

The $64 question
OK, there are too many secrets on the show. We just need actual plots involving romance and real, visible complications. The show is not called "I've got a Secret"!!! I am intrigued by the idea that Ben and Kelly are siblings, and that maybe he killed their incest-loving dad. That would explain their connection, but why would Jenna be so wigged out by that? -- MICHAEL

The answer is: WE SO BAD (Worst Ever Soap Opera Believe Anything Disease)
SORAS, SOWCAS, C/WCAS best analogy ever!! I laughed out loud. Completely accurate. Now what do we all suffer from to be able to swallow it all?? :) -- JEN

A funny thing happened on the way to the hospital
What's with your hospitals in the States? Can anyone go in and change a DNA test or get out of bed for a visit after a life or death operation? You need to have the writers put their feet back on the ground. Its things like this that show us they do not pay attention to small items. -- TERESA

Leslie scores a home run:
Wow! When it comes to husbands between Leslie and Hilary, Leslie sure hit it out of the ballpark!! Barton is everything Neil is not -- better looking, smarter, more confident. But then, Barton was hot when he played a Dr on OLTL. Y&R should have mentioned World Cup Soccer at least briefly. Talk about hot YOUNG men!!! -- COLLEEN

Kelly should cool it I'm so tired of the newest carrot by the writers, Kelly + Stitch's secret. I'm sick of Kelly saying what a horrible thing Stitch did when she helped break up his marriage and Billy's. Granted for different reasons. I'm tired of her character exploding over every little or big thing. Only the character of Phyllis could pull it off. Phyllis needs to come back and get rid of Kelly. Never liked her character from the start. Don't like the new Billy, but I am willing to give him a chance. He looks too old for the part and lacks that certain look the two previous Billys had. -- KATHY ELISE

You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone:
Fans are correct, no matter who you cast as Billy, he is not Billy Miller and they will not accept him. -- TIMOTHY

OMG -- Is it just me, or does New-New-Billy look, sounds and has the same mannerisms as Stitch -- DEBBI

I think that David Tom was the perfect replacement for Billy Miller who was a tough act to follow. When I first saw Burgess on today's show, I thought he was Stitch with a wig on. They look too similar. They can play brothers. I am SO sorry to see David Tom exit. -- LYNNE

Yet ANOTHER Billy Abbott! Seriously ! I was just getting used to the new one and then you change him Again! Bad move. Yes he looked too young for the role but I think the biggest reason people bitched was because they wanted so much for the original Billy Miller. You guys screwed up again. -- SHERRY

Unhappily ever after:
Why did they let Neil and Hilary get married? Hilary should have been with Devon. It's time for Neil to experience his brother's pain when he slept with his wife. -- DOROTHY

Final thoughts
Over half of the email for the last two weeks concerned fans' continuing responses to the recasts for Adam and Billy. Fans are still requesting that Billy Miller return to his role, especially after that big Emmy win. We can only hope that Y&R will eventually make him an offer he can't refuse. Until then, I'm going to "make do," and since I "can't be with the one I love. I'll love the one I'm with."

If you are exposed and develop a serious case of WE SO BAD (Worst Ever Soap Opera Believe Anything Disease), drink lots of water, turn slowly in a circle, and say the following three times: "It's only a soap." Repeat the exercise as many times as it takes to believe the unbelievable.

Until next time, fellow fan addicts, take care and remember that nighttime shows come and go, but soapland is forever.

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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