The queen was in the counting house

Boone
The queen was in the counting house
The queen was in the counting house

In a soapiverse kingdom far, far away, one queen sat in her counting house, plotting revenge, while the king of another had a twisted tryst with his step-mommie dearest. Hear ye, hear ye in this week's Two Scoops.

Watching Y&R was a challenge last week because my one and only TV went kerbluey, and I had to figure out how to watch my beloved soap over the Internet. What a difference going from my 55-inch flat screen to my 12-inch notebook. Not to mention that I had to watch so many commercials that by the time they were over, I had forgotten what had happened. Thank goodness for Jenny and Nel and their excellent recaps. Those helped me get completely caught up!

What another wonderful week on The Young and the Restless. I am so glad that the drama has returned to its roots in the workplace. We have Jabot, Newman, Brash & Sassy, Fenmore's, and Chancellor for the big corporate businesses, and then there's the Athletic Club, Underground, Crimson Lights and Chelsea 2.0 for the small and semi-small, plus GC Buzz as media. There is no unemployment in Genoa City, so if you have any imaginary friends looking for work, send them there!

While I love Jess Walton the actor, Jill-the-pill is one of the characters that I most love to hate. I think that's because she can be so mean and cruel and so wrong-headed, but she always seems to get what she wants and never suffers any real consequences. I'd like to think it's moral indignation on my part, but I'm pretty sure it's envy. I can imagine myself as queen bee Jill, sitting in my counting house, plotting revenge on the sister that for a long time I didn't know I had and when I found out, I sued her for half her inheritance and won.

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And despite owning a much larger business enterprise, I am now determined to quash my sister like a bug for the heinous action of trying to save our company without my assistance. Am I a controlling witch or what? And I am so greedy and needy that I'm willing to sell assets to raise cash for my vendetta so I can prove to everyone that I am the biggest and baddest of the dreaded queen bees!

Wow! Rumor has it that Jill may have to temporarily abdicate the throne if her count of the treasury comes up short. Maybe that will stop her before she hurts Lauren, Jack, Fenmore's, or even Chancellor if Jill gets more focused on revenge than she is on success.

Meanwhile, the crown is not resting easy on King Jack since he and step-mommie dearest, Gloria, commiserated, drank too much grog, and drunkenly trysted. Jack was definitely groggy the next morning when he woke up naked, next to Gloria. Now Gloria has Jack by the short hairs and wont be denied a seat at the proverbial round table. Gloria was once queen to John Abbott's king, and she wants to be queen again.

Gloria is much more venal than Jill and an even more horrible person, but I like Gloria better. Probably because I don't see as much of myself in Gloria as I do in Jill, though I prefer to think it's because I did not anticipate this twist -- and I like it! Jack has been 35 for the last 30 years; it's about time he grew up and bedded a woman his own age! For all of Gloria's faults, she's a strong, empowered woman who takes care of herself without remorse or self-doubt. I don't know if she's self-confident or just deluded. Either way, she's the queen of connivers, and this story has me hooked, just like strong, empowered Queen Jill's story does.

Yay! Lauren has a compelling story that, so far, doesn't include adultery. She's a large and in charge queen bee and a savvy businesswoman, despite nearly bankrupting Fenmore's. She certainly got the best of Jack and had the last laugh during that GC Buzz interview. I do think that it would have made more sense for Lauren to have gone to Jill for help when the company went into crisis, but I can also understand why Lauren would want to handle things on her own. This new workplace dynamic is fun to watch, and it's refreshing to see something other than the Victor/Jack vendetta play out.

Queen Victoria was also in her counting house, running numbers and trying to figure out how to buy Brash & Sassy solo. Cane objected, and Billy called Victoria, "Mrs. Mustache," but Victoria had some good reasons for wanting to be in charge, Queen Bee syndrome being one, but not the only one. Victoria was the original founder and guiding force of the company. When she pointed that out, Prince Billy acquiesced graciously. Step-prince Cane called Billy's action a "ploy" to bed Victoria.

Billy admitted that he did want to rebed Victoria, but it's hard to tell what Billy's real intentions are, since he made a pass at Phyllis also. I'd still like to see a "Philly" pairing, but it looks like we're headed down the "Bictoria" path once again. I won't mind if Billy and Victoria reunite, but if they break up again, I don't think I can summon up much enthusiasm for yet another reconciliation.

Is it just me, or does Cane seem whiny and passive aggressive these days? He's had more jobs at more places than anyone else in town No wonder he doesn't have enough money saved to buy a share of Brash & Sassy! He never has enough tenure anywhere to get vested in a 401K or whatever those pension plans are called these days. Doesn't Lily have money? Surely, her brother, the billionaire, paid her a generous salary for managing his "world-class hotel," as the Athletic Club was described to the blonde applicant Devon interviewed for Lily's job.

I don't understand Lily's decision to give up a steady job with regular hours to pursue a risky, short-shelf-life modeling career that will have irregular hours and will take her jetting around the world, when Lily has young children at home. Has Lily given any thought about what her job will mean for them? Has she forgotten what happened when Cane was gone from home for long periods of time? Apparently she has. That's what I love to hate about Lily. She acts impulsively on the first thought that comes into her head and then regrets it later. I think modeling is a step down for Lily and -- in my opinion -- takes her out of queen bee contention.

Still, while the modeling story is not new, there is a whole different dynamic at work here and a different pairing of actors. I like that we will have Lily interacting more with Victoria and Billy, not to mention the charming new photographer who will be taking enticing photos of Lily. One thing I'm pretty sure we can expect is that Cane will get very jealous.

It's been a rough week for Queen Victoria. Not only was she beset by work woes, but her teenaged son was creating chaos in the castle. Usually I don't feel sorry for Victoria. She's been 28 for the last fifteen years and -- just like Jack -- I think it's time for her to grow up, but when Reed said that she was "Victor's daughter, cold and mean," I winced. Once again, I was thankful that I did not have children. Not only do I remember similar sassy comments from myself to my own parents, I now hear those same kind of sarcastic comments from my great-nieces and -nephews to their parents! The writers nailed my experience.

I can't see any other way that Victoria could have handled the situation with Reed than the way she did -- it's the same thing my relatives do: grounding and take away the electronics -- but their kids don't immediately start towing the line, like Reed did after Victoria laid down the law. My great-nieces and -nephews would never acquiesce so quickly. They spend a lot more time arguing about why someone else should do the chore or being cajoled and/or threatened than it would take to just do what they were first asked and then told to do. Go figure. By the way, any of you who have teenagers now, or have raised teenagers, might give your opinion about how realistic this story is compared to your own experience. Is Reed a typical teenager? Were we all like that? Or just us dysfunctional ones? Leave your comment below! I'd love to hear from real parents on a subject about which I can only speculate. By the way, I do love my nieces and nephews. I'm just happy to be an aunt instead of a parent!

Love, love, love the GC Buzz gang, and I am so happy that Mariah finally has a steady job that pays well. I wanted more Devon, Hilary, and Mariah, and it looks like I'm gonna get it! Yee haw! Hilary sounds so reasonable and so sincere that I really want to believe that she's back to the good Hilary, but Hilary is very crafty, and as far as conniving goes, Hilary could share the crown with Gloria. There is no doubt that Hilary wants Devon back, but whether it's for love or love of money remains to be seen. Mariah flashed a little queen bee syndrome when she stalked off the set. Here's hoping that Mariah turns out to be more than a lady-in-waiting and gets a queen bee throne of her own.

If Gloria is the queen of conniving, then Sharon is the queen of insecurity, and nowhere was that clearer than when Sharon dumped a pitcher of milk over Nikki in rejection of Nikki's attempt to be nice -- albeit somewhat sarcastically. Once again, Sharon Case has given a touching, if underrated, performance that demonstrated all of Sharon's fears and longings very clearly. It's always my hope that Nick and Sharon find their way back to one another, but like viewer Denise wrote, "Sharon Case seems to work well off of any actor..." I agree 100%, so whether Sharon reunites with Nick, or Dylan is recast -- some other suggestions from Denise as recasts: Michael Park, Daniel Cosgrove, Grayson McCouch -- Sharon will continue to reign -- pun intended -- on everyone's parade as insecurely as she can!

Since Adam was first presumed dead, it's been clear that the writers are pushing Nick and Chelsea together. So far, though, I'm not feeling it. It's way too soon for a rush to romance, and a sexual relationship between them now seems predictable and forced. They both have other priorities, and Chelsea is a queen bee in her own right -- not to mention the big secret that Chelsea is keeping from Nick.

I'd really like to see a healthy friendship between them develop first, but I don't think that can happen as long as Chelsea doesn't tell Nick that Christian is really Adam's son. This is my least favorite story and the one that seems most stale. I don't know why Y&R keeps perpetuating the myth that women always have to have a man in their lives to be complete. Even if that's true, there are a whole lot of us out here who don't and manage to cope and even -- surprise, surprise -- find happiness. I'd like to see a story or two about someone who thrives without a man. Personally, I'd rather see the Bella paternity story unfold before a romance between Nick and Chelsea blossoms and the Christian paternity tale is told.

I do hope that Nick comes to his senses and lets Sharon back into Christian's life. Nick could use the help, and why shouldn't Sharon have the opportunity to give all that love she has bottled up to a child that needs it. Surely there is room enough in Christian's life for Sharon. Christian knows Sharon as his mother. It has to be devastating for him to lose her. It would be one thing if Sage was alive, but she's not. So why should Christian be the one to suffer?

It's been good to see a softer side of Victor. He had become much too villainous during the tenure of the previous Queen Bee showrunner. I am very happy to again see Victor as a loving patriarch who is a good man that is sometimes over-zealous in the protection of his family, instead of a paranoid Machiavellian egomaniac bent on hurting them. Bravo to this writing change and a return to a Victor we can admire instead of despise.

READ MORE OF THIS WEEK'S TWO SCOOPSThe Bold and the Beautiful | Days of our Lives | General Hospital |

Hear ye, hear ye! It's been another great week in Genoa City, and the town crier is crying out for more, more, more! With tongue planted firmly in cheek, I urge you to join me in two weeks in the Fenmore's conference room for the next Soapaholics meeting. Guest speaker Queen Bee emeritus Nikki Newman will address the topic: "Living with Queen Bee syndrome." After a brief Q&A, contestants Jill Abbott Atkinson, Ashley Abbott, Lauren Fenmore Baldwin, Gloria Fisher Bardwell, and Hilary Curtis Hamilton will vie for the right to sit on the Queen Bee throne and be proclaimed "Queen for a while." Previous titleholder Jack Abbott will crown the winner.

Until next time, have a great couple of weeks, and if you've been diagnosed with Queen Bee syndrome, be sure to get plenty of rest on your Queen Bee throne. I know I will as I watch my beloved soap royalty sweep through February!

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