Green-eyed monsters

by Mike
For the Week of November 21, 2016
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Green-eyed monsters
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The week of November 21, 2016
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I still get jealous? Quinn channeling Nick Jonas over new neighbor Katie might bring back the beast in her while Ridge's graveside coveting led to one of his more interesting proposals. Explore the envy with Two Scoops' Mike!

Has your week been bold and beautiful? Did you tell a potential stepparent to step off? Did you literally try to make the most of a grave situation? Did you buy an industrial strength Sharpie to cross out someone's change of address card? These and more situations faced the Forrester-Logan-Spencer-Avant clan this week!

Well, Scoopers, usually B&B feels like a whole different world when you come back to it two weeks later; this time, the world in general feels different. Fortunately, there's still plenty of attempted romancing and backstabbing on our soap to otherwise occupy us. Quinn may turn back to the Dark Side faster than Anakin Skywalker, and Stephanie finally got to see Ridge's matrimonial mischief for herself! Let's Scoop about it!

The week picked up where the last left off, with Ridge and Quinn killing each other with kindness under their breath in front of the entire fashion world. I have to agree with Chanel's contention in her last column: Ridge and Quinn do rather seem poised to have some kind of anger sex. Look how much electricity there was when Liam clashed with Quinn! And not the kind Ivy fell backward into.

Ridge sets off a calmer brand of sparks with his new stepmommy, but with no less heat. Would the man who sneaked into bed with his brother's wife as a prank be beyond shagging his father's wife to help get rid of her? It wouldn't be the first time Ridge crossed that paternal line; betcha that videotape of Ridge sleeping with Eric's then-wife Brooke is still collecting dust somewhere. Sexing Quinn would be one helluva scheme!

I in no way believe that a dress tailored for Steffy fit Quinn, but I do think the "jewelry pass" was a unique idea. Wonder why no one's ever come up with it before, given Quinn has been with Forrester Creations the bulk of three years? At any rate, FC's three buyers love love loved it and deemed Ridge and Quinn a good team. Hmm. Even Steffy took a sip of the Quinn Kool-Aid and conceded that Quinn's stunt raised revenue!

Gotta have a talk with those Forrester interns, though. Maybe Ivy can help them wipe the brown off their noses the way she wiped the Australian off her voice. Didn't Christina come on as an intern the same time Nicole and Zende did? Of course, Zende got bumped up to photographer; what exactly does Nicole do but pop out babies? She and Christina shouldn't still be interns after over a year.

Nicole rightfully chose green as her favorite fashion statement after she caught Zende rockin' the Forrester jet with Sasha. The less said about these three, the better. Because they contracted Lame Misunderstanding Disease from Leffy/Lope, no one was on the same page, and all made dopey decisions, though Zende had the most egg on his face because of Nicole's eggs.

Wasn't it just six months ago that Zende porked Sasha over Nicole's surrogacy, with Sasha wondering what it meant for her and Zende? Well, the shutterbug and his model had the exact same conversation after the fashion show. Speaking of pork, Zende is a pig now, so I would personally like to see Sasha resign from being his sidepiece and tell him once was nice but girlfriend ain't goin' down that road again. You grow, girl!

Then Zende, whose latest bright idea included flying Sasha off to Hawaii on #DrunkBrooke Airlines, told his second choice they should steer clear of Nicole for the immediate future. Thought that one up yourself? I bet Kristen and Tony wouldn't be too thrilled if they saw how many IQ points their camera-stealing adoptee has dropped since moving back to the City of Angels. Get it together, Forrester-Dominguez.

Over at the Forrester mansion, Katie dropped by to thank the convalescing Eric for pulling strings to get Will into some highfalutin academy (hey, just be glad the kid's not in high school already) and later brought the Forrester patriarch a bottle of Dom Perignon as a thank-you. Eric paid it forward by inviting Katie to watch the fashion show with him. Interesting, suddenly having Katie in Eric's orbit!

They've hardly had screen time together since Katie became Forrester's CEO under Bill's takeover, a position even Katie was surprised the show mentioned! I love it when B&B stops pretending that past story arcs didn't happen; more please! I'll credit Eric's brain hemorrhage for his warm remembrance of Katie occupying his chair; his memory probably doesn't include helping to create the ugly Dare line to sabotage Katie and Bill.

Though Katie admitted she was lonely post-divorce from Bill, no sparks flew between her and Eric, which was good. Nick Marone currently holds the record for bagging all three Logan sisters. If Eric takes Katie to bed, he will checkmate Nick permanently by having boinked the Logan trio and their mother. Even Brooke couldn't compete with that! Good thing Eric's newfound robustness seems focused directly on Quinn.

If Quinn did feel a tingle standing on the runway with Ridge (I know I would), she forgot it as she spied Katie's "naughty shade of red" on an unbroken goblet and practically put the Forrester compound on lockdown. Unappeased by Eric laughing off the innocent hang-out, Quinn somehow knew Katie's cell number by heart and hit up the newly single Logan, asking for some notice next time so they could all buddy-buddy together.

"There's no reason to feel insecure," Katie assured Quinn. Our acne-afflicted teenager has come a long way, hasn't she! Katie was the poster child for insecurity when the show started in 1987, to say nothing of her plunge into paranoia over Bill just this year. So something pinged when that came out of Katie's mouth. Nonetheless, Quinn should know she has nothing to worry about.

Not to make light of it, but Brooke Logan is a woman who was viciously raped in her own home -- a home in which we only ever see the kitchen anymore. Yet Ridge and Bill can simply wander in, uninvited, without ringing the "Song Sung Blue" doorbell or knocking, and Brooke just wags a finger at them. You'd think she'd have some 24-style security system that required retina ID to bypass.

Nevertheless, I caught a glimpse of the old Ridge as he offered Brooke something sweet and delicious! I know Thorsten Kaye has his own take on the dressmaker; however, he did seem to channel Ronn Moss there for a moment. Brooke may not have swooned over Ridge's aw-shucks attempt at courtship, but he melted my ice cream. I digress. The mention of courtship actually brings up an important point.

And that point is, B&B offers little-to-no courtship. After two years apart, Brooke and Bill passed go and went straight to marriage without even finding out if they were still compatible. Ridge is trying to do the same thing with Brooke. You don't just jump into a commitment, especially with an ex. And how much romance the soap could generate if we got a chance to see Brooke dating Bill, or Ridge, or whoever she wants to be with!

For all Brooke's insistence that Bill is the love of her life (I call BS on that one, or self-denial, at least), suddenly she has a "decision" to make. Ooh, them's fightin' words. I've seen enough of these "decisions" on B&B to last a lifetime. If Brooke needs to decide between Bill and Ridge, then she only loves one of them or she doesn't love either of them. I'm surprised Bill is putting up with this. Or that his ego is!

Last time Bill had any major interaction with Brooke and Ridge's only son, he won points with the then-Chucky-like scion by gifting him with a Spencer sword necklace. Maybe R.J. stashed his with the one Steffy never mentions anymore, because Bill failed to use this point-getter to remind his wannabe stepson how tight they are. Instead, R.J. hurled so many insults at Bill, Brooke had to scold, "Manners!"

Not that I'm not enjoying R.J. yanking Bill's gold-encrusted chain. Bill is so used to getting what he wants and telling women they're in relationships with him that he doesn't know how to process some snot-nosed kid getting the better of him. Oh, to be a fly on the wall in some parallel universe where Bill actually had to be a father to Wyatt and Liam as teenagers. They'd have made R.J. look like Shirley Temple!

With R.J. conveniently late for school (at least he's enrolled), Brooke decided Spencer Publications should have a Take Your Future Stepson to Work Day and foisted her hostile adolescent on Bill, who had R.J. put conflict resolution on ice in favor of teaching him how to throw punches and trying to wow the kid with a secret hideaway filled with guns and money! To me that sent messages I don't think our soap intended.

I'm surprised Bill didn't show R.J. the love shack where he tried to bone his mother! It's all true to his character, if nothing else; even he said "They don't call me Dollar Bill for nothing." There was just something unsettling in that scene. R.J. wasn't buying it, and neither was the look-who's-here Liam, who unglued himself from Steffy long enough to actually ship Brill to his almost half-brother. Anything to keep Bill away from Steffy, eh?

R.J. may have had to suck down Bill's ever-present wheatgrass juice as a result of Bill's green-eyed jealousy, but Ridge took his own greenness to another level by bringing out the big guns that every girl simply longs for from her beloved: Ridge took Brooke to his mother's grave! Getting too old to write women's names on the Eiffel Tower or crash through windows in Zorro costumes, Ridge?

You won't see tombstone temptation like this on The Bachelor. Ridge and Brooke looked like they were in someone's backyard. Where exactly is Stephanie buried, anyway? Was this supposed to be a private cemetery, like the long-gone private dining room? Anyway, the Stephanie luv was appropriate, because it's nearing the fourth anniversary of her death. (I know, because my friend Christopher died just before Stephanie did.)

B&B then treated us to a plethora of Stephanie flashbacks, which was wonderful to see. Of course I would have liked to get less latter-day ones and more from the '80s and '90s, but I still enjoyed the tribute. Brooke even spoke for us all when she reminded Ridge that he should have been present at Stephanie's deathbed. And that's where things got a little weird.

Probably because there's only 19 minutes to an episode (15 if you count repetitive dialogue, 13 after flashbacks, 12 after establishing shots), some details end up glossed over or simplified, else you'd use up whole scenes on explanations. Ridge lamented how he and Brooke had screwed up the reunion Stephanie wanted by falling into old patterns. No, Ridge, you started it by dumping Brooke because she texted Deacon!

Then Brooke sighed that she wished she were more like Stephanie. It's true La Forrester's last wishes included Brooke standing up as the head of the family. But Stephanie's body was barely cold before Brooke became intrigued by Bill, which is exactly what Stephanie wouldn't have wanted! An acknowledgement would have been nice. Instead, Ridge used his mother's coffin to campaign for Brooke! Eww.

I guess he had to find a way to top proposing in an Italian olive grove. Rings in Champagne glasses are old hat, too. But at least Brooke didn't swoon into her one-time destiny's arms. She wondered if Ridge could be believed, predicting there'd again be someone younger and prettier (some Caroline resentment there?). Ridge had to concede they'd both tried to find happiness elsewhere, but it hadn't worked.

So, with his mother's decaying body under him, Ridge whipped out Stephanie's old ring and proposed. I almost hope Brooke accepts. Brill has been tainted from the get-go, and even with Thorsten Kaye as half of them, Bridge has always been endgame. After three years, nuRidge isn't so "nu" anymore; maybe it's time. And I think it would be the least Bill deserved for cheating on Katie thrice. He can lick his wounds with his money!

Likely tired of hearing Maya blame his desire to procreate for messing things up for her sisters, Rick became super chummy with Aunt Katie, which we haven't seen since he probed her about Dr. Wolin's death, which resulted in absolutely nothing. Little Ricky couldn't wait to help Katie find a house, though he never bothered to ask exactly where she and Will are living now. Quinn's abandoned hotel room, maybe?

Rick located the perfect listing, and Katie wasted no time contacting her Realtor, Amy, played by Cindy Ambuehl, the wife of Don Diamont (Bill). I liked that the show winked about Amy being married to an actor, "a power couple," with Katie telling Eric, "I used to be a part of a couple like that." In-jokes like that are awesome, aren't they? Especially when they aren't immediately obvious or eye-rolling. This was happily neither.

Love Katie's potential house, but I don't think it's typical to sell a house fully furnished like that. And stone, wood, red shag carpeting in Beverly Hills? I've been through BH many times, and it's not close to much of anything except busy roads where it's next to impossible to park. At any rate, Katie decided the house was perfect, and it being next door to the Forrester compound was a brucey bonus.

Eric agreed to grease the palms for Rick ("I respond to invitations better than some" -- #burn), which was a little surprising considering Eric just fielded a bunch of Quinn's questions about Katie. Even if Eric hadn't been married to Sheila, who also tried to go straight, he should know from Quinn's past behavior that change isn't black-and-white; there are many back-and-forth gray areas. Yet he's going with tempting fate.

At the office, Quinn whined to Wyatt that she didn't like any single women alone in the house with her husband. I mimicked Wyatt's double take. What, so Quinn would feel threatened by Nicole? Caroline? Christina the intern? Then Quinn took a few pages out of Steffy's playbook and did some seduction while in lingerie from the Intimates line. Oh, Quinn! It's come to that already? Insecurity line is more like it.

I'm surprised Quinn is struggling with her darker impulses over Katie, who presents no threat. At least when Sheila misread James's friendship with Stephanie, the naughty nurse had years' worth of grudges against La Forrester to base her suspicions on. Quinn wonders if Ridge might have put Katie up to coming between her and Eric. Wouldn't that be the trick of the year? It's rare we see that kind of cleverness these days, but I would welcome it.

"I made you a promise," Quinn reminded Eric, referring to his edict to boot her out if she started acting up again, "and I'm going to keep it." No you ain't, woman! I knew that before Quinn ever marched over to 371 Willow Hill Road in her robe to confront Katie. Great show of sanity, that. Fuming over Katie's "OX" text to Eric, Quinn told Katie in no uncertain terms that she wasn't going to let Miss Logan buy that house!

I might heed those words, Katie. Quinn bitch-slapped Brooke thinking she wanted Deacon and later shoved Deacon off a cliff to protect her relationship with Liam. Plus, let's not forget all the crimes Quinn committed to keep Wyatt with Hope, which included nearly shish-kebabing Liam with a homemade sword! Nope, before long, Quinn Fuller Forrester is gonna be a green-eyed monster in the form of Godzilla!

How 'bout it, Scoopers? Do you think Quinn will restrain herself to preserve her marriage to Eric, or can she just not stop herself from going off? Talk to us in the Comments section below or on the Soap Central message boards, or simply click here to submit feedback. Your comments could wind up in a future column! Like these!

• "Bill is the right choice of husband for Brooke. Ridge is Brooke's ex-husband. If Brooke ends up marrying Ridge the relationship won't last...Brooke and Bill had the best romance up to date. Nicole and Zende should be together...Sasha can hook up with Carter. He is around her age." -- "PassionQueen77"

• "[B&B is] good, then it's bad, but it's always improbable. They are in L.A.! Date someone outside of your geometric love shape...the new Ridge is so freakin' handsome, I could just kvell; however, I still love [Brooke] with Bill. But seriously, why won't any of them or the damn kids, date outside of their love triangle or quadrangle or zip code?" -- M.J.

Now for a few quick Points to Ponder:

Amy suggested that Katie write a letter to help sway the house's seller -- bet Katie didn't include her recent bout with alcoholism. For that matter, would Katie have imbibed the Champagne she brought for Eric had he not deferred to water for his health?... LOL Amy thinking Katie and Rick were husband and wife... If Rick had friends over all the time as a child, we never saw it... If R.J.'s old enough to drive, he must have been aged to 16...

Loved #WelcometoSpencer because it included a shot of Bill Spencer, Sr.!... Ridge asked "Logan" how she could take charge of the Forrester family if she married Bill. Where was that argument when Brooke nearly became a Spencer in 2014?... Extra credit points: "There have been other women in Eric's life," Brooke recalled, "and other people have run Forrester Creations. We've been through this before."... So true! Anyone else think Queric's little love theme sounded like Sophie B. Hawkins' Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover?

Hard to believe I started Scooping for y'all 7 years ago this week! See y'all in December... keep watching, be alert, and most of all, be bold, especially now. Because we're all beautiful.

What are your thoughts on The Bold and the Beautiful? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- so drop your comments in the Comments section below, tweet about it on Twitter, share it on Facebook, or chat about it on our Message Boards.

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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