This is why we can't have nice things...

For the Week of September 26, 2022
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The Hook is on the prowl again, looking for another victim. Lucy is about to be seduced at sea, Liz is sketching someone she shouldn't know, and Chase is rocking the Savoy

Dear readers, is it just me? Are you tired of watching Sasha suffer? I don't understand. Sasha seems like an adorable character. I know she originally came to town at Valentin's bequest to bamboozle Nina into thinking Sasha was Nina's daughter. But even in Sasha's con, she was kind. Sasha genuinely grew to love Nina and secretly wished she really was her daughter.

Her next questionable deed was when Michael was about to lose Wiley (a.k.a. Jonah) to Nelle. Sasha sacrificed her own happiness by pretending to cheat on Michael with Chase. She did this so Michael could dump Sasha with a clear conscience and marry Willow, thereby solidifying his custody case.

My point is that even her evil deeds were done with good intent. So, why does it seem that the writers hate her? Why must she always be in such complete misery? Why did they have to make her a drug addict? Why did they kill her baby? Why did they let us invest in her relationship with Brando, only to kill him off?

Watching those flashback scenes of their romance reminded me of their sweet past. Still, as soon as Sasha started reminiscing, I knew Brando was a goner.

We have seen this pattern before... Julian and Alexis were a couple that everyone adored. The writers ripped them apart. The "Julexis" fans are still hoping for a miracle reunion someday. They were magic together.

Liz and Franco were a couple that everyone was rooting for, and the audience was deeply invested in their love story. Liz and Franco were telling a powerful story of redemption and second chances. Franco was giving Liz's boys an actual father figure for the first time since Lucky split with the Irish chick. But nope. The writers killed off Franco and turned Roger Howarth into Austin, which still makes zero sense. Austin has never had an actual storyline since he came on canvas. Now we have a hint of a storyline with a shady Pautuck cousin and the rumor some woman is pulling his strings. But again, they destroyed Liz and Franco!

Now the writers allowed us to get invested in Brando and Sasha. They made us tearfully watch them mourn their dead Christmas baby. They made us watch Sasha spiral out of control again and again on drugs. Just when we thought the tide would turn, Brando was going to be her guardian and help her get clean, but the writers killed him off. Maybe they have a master plan. Maybe Willow will die from her cancer, and grieving widows Sasha and Michael will get back together and raise Wiley and NuBaby. Sasha will get to be a mom after losing her child and will get to reunite with Michael after sacrificing their relationship years ago.

The only part of this storyline that I like is the evolution of Gladys. When she first came on, posing as Dev's grandma, I couldn't stand Gladys. She was cringe-worthy, and I rolled my eyes every time she came on-screen: "Oh, not her again!" But Bonnie Burroughs has brilliantly taken Gladys from an annoying side character to a solid presence on the show. She's a loving mother, grandmother, and cousin to Sonny. I never imagined myself liking Gladys, but I genuinely appreciate her now. I am not looking forward to watching Gladys grieve her son.

Readers, sometimes I hear people frustrated with a storyline say, "That's it, I quit, I am not watching anymore." You will never, ever hear me say that. I love GH and have watched it for more than four decades. You will never hear me say I will stop watching because I am mad at a plot point. The tagline at the end of every column I write says, "I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows." And I mean it. I am always willing to ride out bad storylines on my soaps because I know the next fantastic storyline is right around the corner. But right now, I am discouraged at the writing for several characters I feel deserve better. Sasha deserves better.

The Hook tried for Ava and missed, tried for Brando and succeeded, and is apparently set to try for Diane on Monday. Oh, please, please, please, don't kill off Diane. I love her so. But since she had that scene with Sonny where they made peace, I am fearful of her fate.

There are a million theories online as to who the Hook may be. I have contributed to the discussion. Who has a history with hooks? A.J., Sonny, Carly, and Jason. Who has a history of drugs and poison? Helena, Jerry Jax, Peter, Esme, and Cyrus. Who has a history of murder and mayhem? Ryan Chamberlain, Heather Webber, Nelle, Cesar Faison, and Franco before his brain tumor was removed. Which characters are unknown and, therefore, automatic suspects? Dex and Rory. Who is losing time and can't account for her whereabouts? Liz. Let's be honest. The potential suspect list is very, very long.

Right now, I am leaning toward Esme (with advisory help from Ryan). Why? The first victim was Ava, who knocked Esme over the parapet at Wyndemere and has been her archenemy since she hit town. I think the second victim, Brando, was just wrong place and time. I think Joss was the intended target, and we know how much Esme despises Joss. It appears that Diane is the next person on the Hook's hit list, and it was Diane, pinch-hitting for Scott Baldwin, who foiled Esme's plan to frame Trina Robinson. All the victims so far have been a thorn in Esme's side. Plus, the shadowy figure we saw in Friday's preview looks about Esme's size. And serial killing is in her DNA.

The thing is, the incredibly talented Avery Pohl is on a three-year contract, so making her the serial killer would significantly limit her storyline. I mean, she can't slash people for three years, right? I suppose she could blame Ryan and tell the world he's been faking his locked-in syndrome. Esme could frame Daddy for murder, get him sent away, and then continue going about her life like nothing ever happened.

Quite a few people think it might be Dex or Rory, which is highly possible. It would be easier to get rid of one of them. One theory is that Rory has been working with Esme from the start and only pretended to like Trina to get her away from Spencer for Esme. I would love for that to be true because getting rid of Rory would clear the path for Trina and Spencer, and that can't happen soon enough for me.

But maybe I shouldn't wish for it, because the writers will probably kill one of them as soon as they are together and happy.

Another storyline that has sparked a lot of debate on Twitter this week is Carly's adventure in Jacksonville. I am firmly on the side of "Love it." Carly came to town like a hurricane set to destroy her mother Bobbie's life and has always been branded a bitch and a homewrecker and many other things. But all of that stemmed from Carly's past and things that happened to her as a child. It made me cringe to see Carly square off with Peyton about their history and to see Peyton blame Carly for seducing her husband. He was a grown man, and Carly, a teenage girlfriend of her daughter. When Carly stood up for herself and said, "I was a child." I was so happy to see the recognition on her face that what happened was not her fault.

Watching Carly lose everything and trying to find a new life is powerful. I love that she is still positive and upbeat. Carly has not allowed her grief to knock the fight out of her. I love Carly. While I agree with the criticism that Carly is sometimes overused, I like that she has her own storyline now. I am happy she has found a worthy cause to fight for, to keep her adoptive mother's (Virginia Benson) grave from being moved. I like that the writers have taken her back to her roots to reexamine her past. I think it will help her move forward into a brighter future.

Okay, readers, right now, I am perplexed by Jordan. Why is Jordan covering for Aunt Stella? Why wouldn't Jordan say to Curtis, "Aunt Stella had our divorce papers right before her stroke, and she just confessed to me that she forgot about them until now, and they are lost."?? Why allow Curtis to be furious and suspicious about Jordan's motives? The truth is so much easier. Why did Stella let Jordan take the blame? This kind of stuff drives me nuts. We had five stupid scenes with Jordan, Curtis, and Portia in some configuration discussing why Jordan never mailed the papers, why she didn't send the documents, if she still wants Curtis, etc. Aunt Stella, fess up and end the madness!

Of course, Jordan knows that Portia is also lying to Curtis about something substantial. Still, she has decided not to say anything. Jordan is a better woman than I am. If Curtis was up in my face, telling me that Portia was always honest and up-front with him, I would 100% tell Curtis that Portia was lying to him about Trina. I would not even hesitate.

Liz begged Kevin for an emergency hypnotherapy session. Since it's a memory from 25 years ago, just how urgent can it be? The session was successful, and Liz could finally see the woman's face at the bottom of the stairs. She sketched the woman on her sketchpad in perfect detail. (Nice to see the writers finally remembered that Liz is an artist.) And it turned out to be... Finn's dead wife, Reiko? Okay, I need to understand the timing here...

Liz came to Port Charles in 1997, which was 25 years ago. She was 16 then, I think. So how did she see Finn's wife being killed 25 years ago? How old is Finn supposed to be? In real life, Michael Easton is 55, so 25 years ago, he would have been 30, so I guess that is plausible. It's just bizarre that these two were connected 25 years ago. So, is Finn the one who pushed her down the stairs or Liz's father? And after all the trauma she suffered in her life, why is it all coming out now?

I am curious to see how this plays out and how the truth will impact Liz. When she looked at the photo of her and her sister Sarah, it made me wonder, since Sarah was in Port Charles in the past, did she know this secret, too? Did she also block it out of her memory? Wouldn't Liz have told her sister at the time if she saw their dad kill someone? So. Many. Questions. Rebecca Herbst is doing a fantastic job with this material. I hope this leads to a special 25th anniversary episode for Elizabeth Webber and her GH journey.

Okay, readers, don't hate me, but I think Lucy and Victor are delightful. I know he's a bad guy, but he's so damned charming I forget sometimes. While I love her relationship with Martin, he has been out of town for a long time, and we can't expect our Lucy to behave herself for a month now, can we? Readers, I love Lynn Herring. I loved Lucy with Scott, I loved Lucy with Kevin, I loved Lucy with Alan Q, and I even loved her duck, Sigmund. Lucy is playing an amateur spy at Anna's request, and if she takes it as far as sleeping with Victor to find out his evil plan, I will not judge her. Charles Shaughnessy is such a delightful addition to the cast. I worry about losing him after Victor tries to freeze the world, harness the wind, or whatever nutty thing he has planned. I would like to keep him for a while.

I have also enjoyed the scenes of Victor with Sonny. Sonny's thug brand of intimidation does not seem to faze Victor. Unfortunately for Sonny, Kristina seems smitten with her great Uncle Victor. They were yukking it up together at Charlie's while Sonny appeared unamused. I felt terrible for Kristina this week. While I understand Alexis' justifiable concern that Kristina may be in the Hook's sights as she witnessed an attack, I wish she had stopped short of criticizing her job.

I am a Nana. I have nine perfect grandkids and three great-grandkids. My grandkids call me and talk to me about their lives, and one of the common themes they have is that their life choices don't align with their parents' expectations, and it causes friction. Some people like working nine to five in an office, and others don't. Some people like the idea of higher education, and some prefer working service jobs with their hands.

My father was a railroad engineer. My mother was a stay-at-home mom. Both were smart and could have been anything under different life circumstances. But we had a happy life, and I was loved, and we never wanted anything. What's wrong with that? Kristina has been through so much trauma in her life, and if working at Charlie's brings her joy or contentment, leave her be. There's my parental advice to Alexis. Now, with that having been said, I do occasionally regret dropping out of college and going on tour with a theater group instead of finishing my degree, but hey, I have fantastic stories.

Remember earlier when I said I was unhappy with the writing for some characters? Add Brook Lynn to that list. Brook Lynn is not a teenager, but they won't write for her as if she is a grown woman. I wish the writers would remember that Brook Lynn is related to Tracy Quartermaine and Lois Cerullo, both badasses. Not to mention that Brook Lynn, years ago, was like this. Are we to believe this girl on the edge of giving Nikolas a lap dance is now afraid to kiss Chase? Please.

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Chase try out to be a Ziggy Stardust impersonator in Vegas? Will Anna keep telling people she's being careful while she is on the docks, alone, when a serial killer is on the loose? Will Jordan stop walking around with the hook before someone thinks she's the killer and pushes her into the harbor? Will Ms. Wu come to Chase's concert and rock out with some hair flips? Will Carly beat Peyton and save the cemetery just in time for Halloween, or will Virginia's ghost haunt Peyton when she is forced to leave her final resting place?

Will Valentin ever get to see Charlotte again, and when he does, will Charlotte be 19 and perfect for Cam? Will Valentin get to appear in the next season of Cobra Kai after that extraordinary kicking of the guard off the Haunted Star? Will Lulu come out of her coma just to get Victor off her vessel and keep him from using the Haunted Star to seduce women? Will Sonny, the protector of all, become Sasha's new guardian to keep her out of jail? Will Alexis return to the bottle if her best drinking buddy of yore, Diane, gets hooked?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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