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 Two Scoops: September 6, 2004 columns
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Kristoff St. John
It's your Two Scoops, too!
by Nita
For the Week of September 6, 2004
This is your soap too, and each column will now feature a section where your comments and feedback will be featured.
For over three years, many of you faithful fans have patiently perused my weekly opinionated piece on who did what to whom and why. Countless numbers of you have taken the time to drop me a line, some of you every week, letting me know what you think and feel about what you've seen and heard. And many of those missives have often made me laugh myself silly. Believe it or not, fans, I look forward to your weekly emails as much as some of you have told me you enjoy my humble opinions.

Well, this is your soap too, and while, with your permission, I've often shared what you had to say, doing so will now be a regular part of the column. And all views are welcome, not just those that coincide with mine. So consider yourself cautioned, because the words you read could be your own. By the way, while you're here, take a few minutes and look around. Soap Central is much more than just Scoops and Updates. If you don't see something you wish you could, instead of chanting Star Light Star Bright and wishing upon the first star that night, just click on "Feedback" and tell us what you wish for most. Who knows, perhaps the Soap Central Fairy will grant your desire.

While I'm on the subject of magic and fairy tales ... okay, so I wasn't exactly on that subject, but I am now, one of the past week's problems could have been taken directly from a book of Fairy Tales. With that in mind, here is my version of "Sleeping Beauty." Of course, this is Genoa City, so, alas, my fractured fable cannot include that famous line found at the end of every fairy tale. You know the one: "And they lived happily ever after."

Once upon a time in the land of Genoa City, some of the most important people in the village came from far and wide to attend a special week-long celebration. There was much food and drink and laughter, but unknown to all but a few, a dark and sinister plot had been hatched and was about to be set in motion. After a gaunt young gnome, Alex, sprinkled a powerful potion in her golden goblet, a beautiful princess named Lily drank deeply, began giggling girlishly and let the gnome whisk her woozily away to a cabled compartment where he pretended to have his wicked way with her. Along came a disgraced knave, who'd once committed such atrocious crimes against the princess he'd practically been banned from the land, but he hoped heroics might restore his blackened armor to a sparkling shine. So he burst into the cabled box, and after a scant skirmish seemingly forced the gnome to scamper away. The princess then fell into a deep and terrifying slumber, and was transported to the tent of the wizards. Who filled her body with a life-restoring antidote while her royal father looked impotently on, and her royal mother gnashed her teeth, stomped her heels, and blamed the princess' innocent companions for failing to protect the princess from her own folly. When the wizards' most magical potions failed to immediately arouse the princess, there was great despair in all the land. And then, past the mourning mother, the fretting father and the concerned companions, Devon, an untried knight in training, marched bravely into the medical chamber, and after pitifully pleading with the princess to return to the land of the allegedly living, planted a kiss ever so softly upon the young princess' downy cheek. And lo and behold, the princess' eyelids quivered, fluttered, and then finally fully opened. The royal parents were overjoyed to have their precious princess restored to them and the whole village rejoiced. And later, as the princess and her appreciative pals lifted their goblets in jubilant joy and celebration, messengers appeared, laden with scrolls, quill pens and their best photo making equipment, eager to record for history the bravery of the once banished knave. Alas, however, due to the vows of vengeance taken by the royal parents, the host of the grand celebration, and various others, the gratitude and adoring attention currently being showered upon the knave is not expected to last.

By the way not that there was ever any doubt, but Kevin's words and actions this week only served to prove how desperately this young man needs professional intervention. He acts as if he really believes the hero hype.

While we're waiting for the next chapter to be written in Sleeping Beauty's continuing tale, we might as well amuse ourselves with all the other dramas and comedies being played out in this made up land of far fetched fantasy.

As always when Dru attempts to pull a fast one, it isn't long before her deception is discovered. Concerned that the foster parent preliminary paperwork had not been signed, sealed and re-delivered, Lorena Davis lifted the ewe's wool from Neil's eyes to show him what has really been going on. Despite the care and concern shown by Devon for his "play" sister, and undeterred by the fact that ejecting the boy will land him in a Level 12 facility where unfortunate urchins are locked in, probably electronically monitored and perhaps even drugged into drowsiness if that's what it takes to make them toe the facility's many lines (sounds like a place tailor made for Kevin), Neil remained determined to cut the family ties keeping the abandoned boy close. He has no desire to be a foster dad and doubts Dru is able or qualified to play a Mom. I could be wrong, but this time it seems Dru's womanly wiles won't woo her man onto her side of the fence. Should Neil's words prove to be the final ones on the foster parenting matter, it will be interesting to see how it affects his relationship with Lily, not to mention Dru. I would imagine that forgiveness would be a long time coming unless another alternate home-like placement was found.

Which, of course, made me immediately think of Damon. Fans have wondered almost since the moment he stepped a clog clad foot on GC's soil, just what sometimes made Damon so morose and melancholy. Well, now we know. Hinted at previously by several cryptic comments and an occasional frozen facial expression, it turns out Damon does indeed have some experience at parenting. It was a sad tale he told Phyllis about once having a boy of his own who died tragically in his arms, an eight year old victim of a drive-by bullet apparently meant for his father. Fueled by vengeance and hatred for the shooter, the bullet took not only his son's innocent life, but drained the joy and love from his marriage as well. Now that his sorrowful secret is out, who better to guide a parentless boy like Devon through the wicked woods of the world than he? Especially since Mr. Corporate Executive can't be so bothered, already having a daughter he pays little attention to. Now that we know the depths to which Damon has been driven, and the anger he admits is still simmering not that far beneath his serene-seeming surface, it could spell disaster for any further confrontations between he and Daniel. On top of that, it's likely Genoa City is about to become home to the man many are sure is the shooter, a circumstance which will surely rip the scabs off Damon's scarcely healed wounds and retract the steel gate holding his monster at bay. He may be way too angry to be a role model for Devon. And finally, because I must give credit where credit has been earned, Damon's performance as the devastated dad was outstanding. I'm glad he's finally been given a chance to be more than a big boy toy for some bored Genoa City broad and I eagerly anticipate the continued erosion of his happy face façade.

So, if Devon is left with no positive role model to emulate, who might wind up being a negative one? Well, let's hope it won't be Alex or any of his crew cronies. No one was the least surprised to learn Daniel and Kevin had leaped into their so-called plan without looking or making sure there was a safety net anchored below. Little did they know that Alex didn't travel alone, he had a crew that dabbled in, well, I'm guessing drugs. And in exchange for keeping his mouth flap fastened about the mini minds behind Kevin's redemption melodrama, Daniel and Kevin are expected to ensure Alex and associates have full and unchallenged access to the Rec Center. At least that was the plan until Alex paid an uninvited visit to Daniel's current digs. Unfortunately, Alex hadn't ended his visit by the time Phyllis came home. Immediately recognizing Alex as the criminal he is (takes one to know one?), one rude retort led directly to the next and after calling fearless Phyllis the "B" word, Alex received something his mother probably doesn't even dare to deliver to him - a resounding slap right across his impertinent mouth. Once she'd gone into full scale Mother mode, Phyllis didn't bother to turn it off and when Daniel tried pushing the once red hot I'll go live with Christine button, he found to his dismay, the bulb and battery had burned completely out. And I heard the cheers of fans all over the globe as Phyllis smartly told her son to do that, then left him to cook in his own confusion.

Life is dysfunctional as usual within the family circle of Baldwin, Fisherman and Fisherwoman. After being invited to lodge indefinitely at Mi Casa is Your Casa Abbott and presumably leaving all but the clothes on her arched back in an Abbott guest suite, Gloria inexplicably jumped back in the cab and motored back to Michael's. It was a good thing she did too, because otherwise she never would have known just how sick her youngest boy had become. After listening to Michael's long litany of Kevin's crimes, she had the unmitigated gall to be horrified that a boy who'd been bullied, beaten, locked in a dark and stuffy closet and generally made to feel like he had little more worth than a piece of trouser pocket lint for most of his life, would grow up to commit crimes like statutory rape, arson, attempted murder, and let's not forget beating an apartment and its contents to within an inch of its manufactured life. Guess old Glo hasn't heard the cliché about children growing up to do what they see, not what they're told, or something like that. Given the Goofy Gloria and Terrible Tom parental examples he was subjected to, Gloria's lucky she's alive and able to attempt to fleece John Abbott. And in spite of all that Michael had to say, it left Gloria no less determined to move in with John anyway and continue to keep him in the dark. She deserves whatever she gets.

I guess you can tell Gloria's tearful remorse for how thoroughly she'd failed her boys also failed to move me to sorrow on her behalf. Although I loved her and Michael's heart-to-heart. Because in spite of his obvious anger at her, Michael still manages to give the impression he desperately wants to find a way to forgive and forget and maybe even love his Mom as Kevin unreservedly does, but just doesn't know how to get there. Likewise, in all his interaction with Kevin, while he's all gruff growling and baleful barking, and obviously sees through his brother like he has x-ray vision, it's also obvious he loves him anyway and just wishes he could save him from himself, probably just as he wished he could have saved him from Tom and Gloria. For all the members of the Baldwin-Fisher family fold, it was definitely a week worth watching and I enjoyed every second. I can't wait for the day the hard, shellacked shell in which Michael's encased his deepest emotions, shatters to slivers. That will definitely be a handful of hankies day. There is still plenty of excitement in store watchers of this family, not the least of which will likely be a coming conflict between the brothers over Michael and Lauren's deepening relationship.

With Mac sightings few and far between, J.T. and Brittany continue to play nicely together. Rose is presumably a good pal of the distant past, so Brittany was forced to ask her only other apparent pal, J.T., to be her manservant of honor. In exchange for helping the bride-to-be page through catalogs of wedding wear and place set patterns, Brittany agreed to go undercover to help J.T. catch a Fenmore thief. Not only was the case solved in almost less time than it took for Paul to tell J.T. what the problem was, believing that the Fenmore clerk would so quickly approach a total stranger with her discount deal was just a wee bit hard for me to choke down. But the undercover caper probably did exactly what it was intended to, cement J.T. and Brittany just that much closer.

A couple growing closer is definitely not what is happening in the once idyllic world of Nikki and Victor. Victor is behaving uncharacteristically uncaring, and for those fans who rapidly replied, so what else is new, I meant where Nikki's concerned. The past week was a repeat of the week before as Victor continued to concern himself with everything not having anything to do with what might be weighing on his wife. Now that Joshua's younger brother has been given a name, the middle one being Robert, many are asking whether Bobby could be the missing Casein boy. As to Bobby's original back story of a living mother in New York, that could easily be explained away by the suddenly orphaned tiny tot being brought up by an aunt as her own who elected to tell him nothing about his tragic past. Just my guess; time will ultimately tell.

So, at least for now, it seems a halt can be called in the hostile tug of tot between the Carlton couple and the demanding bio daddy. Although, since Brad has been essentially outnumbered from the start, the outcome was never really in question. Ashley the Annoying wasted no time be-bopping over to the Rec Center to spread the happy news, a canary eating grin splitting her faithless face. As always, the only thing worth watching was Abby, who stole every scene from her cast mates with adorable ease. If you didn't know better, you'd swear Bradley really was her Daddy; such is the chemistry between them.

Wow, didn't Jill tell Brad how she really felt! That exchange was definitely worth a rewind although the pool boy gigolo pretended he'd never even felt the prick when she plunged her scornful barb deep in his puffed up chest. Before showing up at the meeting, Ashley had put on her usual even on my worst day, I'm better than all of you war face, and her condescending smirk never slipped an inch as she listened to Brad put Jill's Men's Line, and for all intents and purposes, Jill, out to pasture. But I didn't bother to chew off my fingernails with worry on Jill's behalf. Obviously, she'll soon be moving the contents of her credenza to an office at Chancellor Industries. It will definitely be interesting to see if Elliott's charming veneer can stand up to the heat of Jill's constant presence.

And now ... dah dah dah dahhh ... fresh from the Viewers Voice box:

Jean says: "I think that Nikki and Bobby Marsino will begin to heat up, especially with Victor ignoring Nikki. I don't know why Brad and Nikki just don't let Victor and Ashley have each other. I am looking forward to Jack getting really involved with CI. Also, this Alex is really a creepy character. I expect he is going to cause quite a commotion."

And from Wanda: "I've seen some weird match-ups over the years, but this one between Bobby and Brittany is the most far-fetched one yet. Do you think there will really be a wedding? Why aren't her parents objecting to high heaven about these upcoming nuptials? They thought she shouldn't be seeing Raul so why would this go unnoticed? Besides, Anita should be planning the wedding of the century for Genoa City.

And Annie: "I am now looking forward to what Gloria conspires for John Abbott; love that Phyllis has such a problematic son; if anyone deserves it, Phyllis does. The Nikki story is great, as is Jill and Jack and the hit. Hopefully Bobby and Nikki will get together and Ashley and Victor will leave forever with Abby and all their garbage. I wonder what this new stockbroker high school buddy of Nick's will bring to Y&R."

Sandi from Madison never bites her tongue and I love it! "I wish Ashley would GO AWAY. I wish Nikki would just open her mouth up to Victor - God knows they are married and this could be going on with her and they DON"T TALK - but then they never have - contrary to what she said to Paul that "they used to talk." Victor has ALWAYS BEEN TOO BUSY BEING VICTOR! Jill is giving me a pain - anything for a pair of pants and a smile."

Hi onedrpepper28! In answer to your question about Malcolm's rumored Y&R return, it certainly appears the rumors are true. I join you on the couch in anticipation of his November return.

And last, but certainly not least, funniest fan feedback of the week award goes to Lon who probably speaks for many fans with her hilarious opinion. "I believe they should change the name of this soap from the Young and the Restless to The Rich but Mentally Challenged. A fair statement is, Genoa City is a cuckoo's nest."

Lon, I wholeheartedly agree. See you all in the insane asylum!

Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of soapcentral.com or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen, what has happened, and to take a look at the logistics of it all. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same view point.
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