"I’d have full-on panic attacks": SZA opens up about her anxiety and finding confidence on tour

As her joint tour with Kendrick Lamar continues to draw massive crowds, SZA has opened up about her ongoing journey with self-doubt and imposter syndrome.

In a new cover story for Interview Magazine, published June 17, the Grammy-winning artist responded to questions from guest interviewer Chappell Roan. Recalling earlier stages of her career, the "Snooze" singer shared:

"Every time I had to go on stage, every time I had to get on a carpet, I’d have full-on panic attacks."

READ ALSO: Kai Cenat appears uncomfortable as SZA introduces him to Kendrick Lamar at BET Awards—knowing he’s tight with Drake

SZA added that at times, the fear was overwhelming enough to keep her from showing up altogether.

"I used to not show up to something because it was like, ‘I’m never going to win. No one cares that I’m here. Why would I go?’"

That mindset lingered into preparations for her Grand National Tour with Kendrick, which kicked off in April. Even with her current level of success, she said doubts persisted.

"Same thing with the Kendrick tour. Everybody’s going to see Kendrick. I don’t even know if I have anything to show these people that’s exciting and new."

Since then, the tour has traveled across North America and is set to move through Europe and Australia in the coming months. The R&B artist shared that she has found new ways to ground herself and move past fear.

"Now it’s just like, ‘F**k it. I don’t have anything else to do, and I want to see where this door is going to lead. I want to walk through the door. I want to see what happens in the uncertainty."

Much of that shift, she noted, has come from spiritual practices and reflection, including time with her astrologer and exploring metaphysical ideas.

“Organic and random”: SZA on how her longtime friendship with Lizzo started

SZA’s close friendship with Lizzo was also brought up. The latter recently joined the “All The Stars” hitmaker on stage during a performance of their “Special” remix.

READ ALSO: “I went for SZA, not Kendrick”- Jagmeet Singh apologizes to Drake and OVO after being called a 'Goof' for attending Kendrick Lamar's concert

"We’ve been friends since, like, 2013, but it was very organic and very random. One day we were on the same tour, and I was like, ‘We’re about to drive out to Lake Michigan, do you want to come?’ And she was like, ‘Yeah, let’s go.’”

She went on:

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And then we just got drunk and hung out, and we kept doing that, and then our lives and careers progressed, and we kept talking and hanging out."

The Grand National Tour continues overseas, and SZA’s candid reflections mark a turning point in her self-trust and artistry.

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