Your official guide to mourning soap opera characters

Posted Friday, August 07, 2015 1:04:40 PM
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If you've recently lost one of your favorites from The Bold and the Beautiful, Days of our Lives, General Hospital, or The Young and the Restless,'s step by step guide to mourning soap characters will help you process and overcome your pain.

It seems that fan favorite soap opera characters are dropping like flies these days. So much so, we wouldn't be surprised if lines started forming outside of cemeteries. Of course, the other lines that are forming are the streams of rampant tears falling down viewers' cheeks. So before you all drown yourselves in sorrow, check out Soap Central's official guide to mourning soap opera characters. It just may be the thing that keeps you sane during this dark, dark time.

Step One: Wail louder than an ambulance

The first step to grieving a beloved fictional character is to cry. And we mean really, really cry. Sure, you could just skip town like GH's Anna Devane (Finola Hughes) chose to do after Duke's (Ian Buchanan) death, but it's much better to face the pain head-on. Your sobs can and should drown out the emotional music that accompanies a character's on-screen death. Fall to the floor, allow yourself to become overcome with grief. You'll feel better for having let it all out, we promise.

Step Two: Throw a vase

You're angry, understandably. How the hell could the show have killed off this beautiful, awesome character? What are they, idiots? There's only one thing to do now: grab the nearest vase (or crystal decanter) and smash it against the wall. It always makes angry soap characters feel better, and we're pretty sure it will work for you, too.

Step Three: Re-watch the scene

To make sure you really feel the whole impact of the character's death, re-watch the heartbreaking death or exit scenes again. Some might say this is needless self-torture, but we say now is the time you can shamelessly wallow in the moment without too much embarrassment.

Step Four: Calm down

Now that you've exhausted yourself with relentless wailing, you're probably feeling worn out. Now is a good time to take a few breaths. And by "a few," we mean about a hundred long, deep breaths to halt the excessive shaking the tears undoubtedly brought on.

Step Five: Check Soap Central to make sure the death is real

Soap operas are known for tricking the audience for shock value, but we usually have the 411 on whether or not the death is a fake (you know, a temporary thing meant to have you throwing vases one day and kissing the TV screen the next) or if the character and his or her portrayer are really, truly on their way out.

Step Six: If the death is real, remember soaps always resurrect characters

Love it or hate it, soap operas have a tendency to never let characters stay dead. Whether they're back in a couple of months or back in a couple of years, most dead soap opera characters seem to find a way back to the canvas. So rest assured that this situation is probably like countless others before it, and it'll only be a matter of time before you'll see your beloved character on-screen again.

Step Seven: Try to focus on the characters still living
Sure, losing a beloved character may make you feel like threatening to never watch your favorite soap opera again, but that would basically be like throwing away everything that ever mattered to the character you're grieving. Try to invest in the family members and friends your character used to love. Who knows, you just may end up with a brand new favorite!

How do you usually mourn the death of a soap character? How long does it typically take for you to feel "normal" watching the show again? We want to hear from you -- so drop your comments in the Comments section below, tweet about it on Twitter, share it on Facebook, or chat about it on our Message Boards.

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