When in Rome

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PS Two Scoops: When in Rome
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The week of May 8, 2006
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Luis is an idiot, but that is nothing new. After Luis and Chad landed in Rome, two complete strangers showed up as protection, and he didn't even call Theresa to see if she had sent them.

"I can't let God down. He gave me this virtual reality headset to practice so I can get into the Pope's chambers." - Whitney

You know your show is in trouble when hokey dialogue like this is being uttered. While I believe people can have ethereal experiences and most certainly hear the voice of God, I certainly don't believe that God hands out virtual reality headsets. I know Whitney is in a bad state of mind right now, but somewhere she has to realize she is being played.

When Whitney fell off that wall, I thought she had been drug away by a tiger or lion or wild dog. Why was the monk growling like that? And what is with these secret underground caves all over Rome that lead out into the main street? Amazingly they look exactly like the underground caves in Harmony.

I am willing to bet good money that Lena sent Maya and Noah after the chalice. That is also what the monk has sent Whitney after. I'm sure before it's over Jessica, Simone, and Paloma will be looking for the chalice too. And wasn't it amazing that Luis was able to fend off those attackers after walking around so weak and frail for weeks. That's some recovery he's made!!!

Luis is an idiot, but that is nothing new. After Luis and Chad land in Rome, two complete strangers show up as protection, and he doesn't even call Theresa and see if she sent them. Then to top it off, he runs all over Rome looking for the monk without the so-called protection. And I hate his smarmy attitude, especially when he called Chris, Sheridan's "soon to be ex husband."

This Vendetta storyline should be the most exciting thing on this show right now, and yet I am bored to tears. I've already figured out the monk is Alistair, and as far and Noah, Fancy, and Maya go, I don't care if Lena kills them. How many times can they break up, get back together, break up, etc. I am excited about Beth's return, but I know that it can't end well. She can't get away with Marty twice; or can she? And at the end of Friday's episode they showed a clip of the delicious Michael Sabatino. I CANNOT WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!

So Ethan poses the eternal question to Sheridan; what if they didn't honor their marriage vows? Hello, Sheridan cheated on Antonio left and right, and will do so on Chris the minute Luis brings Marty back to her. Ethan cheated on Gwen the night Jane was conceived, and he let Theresa take the fall for raping him to boot. So the question of honor where these two are concerned flew out the window ages ago. And he practically pushed Gwen out the door to work so he could be alone with Theresa.

While some may say Gwen acted a witch by not wanting Theresa around while Jane was sick, I don't totally agree with that. This is the same woman she spied trying to seduce her husband a few weeks ago in a garage. I wouldn't want her around me either. And I am firmly convinced Gwen is over Ethan and ready to move on, but she loves Jane and knows that is her only chance to have a child.

First of all, Kay is supposed to be a tomboy. So why was she screaming like a primadonna when she was up on that rock? She was literally two feet from the ground, why couldn't she jump? And the rock sloped down!!! The whole time she was up there, I was screaming at the television for her to climb down. Ridiculous.

Now Siren is in love with Miguel. I know this storyline is supposed to show Kay upset over this, but I can't get behind this storyline at all. Fox acts like a jealous brat, Kay is obviously still in love with Miguel, and Siren and Miguel are just stupid.

Some Random Thoughts:

Since when does Luis know fluent Italian? The only Italian I know I learned from watching "The Sopranos".

It was great to see Luis and Paloma interact, but why did we have to wait for them to hook up in Rome? They are siblings after all!!!

Jessica is almost tolerable without Spike around.

Endora was back and as cute as usual.

I know I'm supposed to pretend, but Siren's "tail" is so obviously made of fabric. Can't they come up with something a bit more realistic looking instead of this Halloween costume? Viewer's Voice:

"I just wanted to make one quick comment that someone else had made clear to me and actually forced me to reevaluate my thoughts on this storyline. At first, like most people I was rather put off with the whole Whitney talking to God storyline, but then someone pointed out that people throughout the ages have claimed to hearing God speak to them. Whole religions and practices are based on the assumptions and writings of people having claimed to have conversations with God. So is it really that stupid to believe a woman in Whitney's mental condition hears God? Think about it!" Thanks Trey!!!

"Hey, Brandi my fellow scooper. I just have something to say that is kind of off subject. This week's Soap Opera Digest touted the Siren storyline as "Soaps Most Shocking Storyline Ever!" Ummmm, do they really think a story about a baby witch conjuring up some chick with a tail and fins is more shocking than Chad an Whitney sleeping together even after they found out they were brother and sister? Or hell, even Whitney beating herself with cat-o-nine tails is more shocking than a Mermaid! Come on. And as a side note, someone needs to push Ethan off a bridge. He is gorgeous but I'm so tired of his waffling. Oh, and could we kindly leave Alistair in the coma? The show is so much better without him." Thanks Melissa!!!

"Hey Brandi. Every week, I read your column religiously, and I have to agree with you about the writers messing up this show. I've been watching the Sci-Fi episodes of Passions (I missed the first year of Passions so I'm watching them now) and I'm hooked! I remember how they never showed Alistair's face. There was so much mystery to the show like who Sheridan killed and what would happen to Theresa when she gets caught about being a stalker. This show started off awesome and the writers just killed it. I just wish they realized how bad their storylines are and turn it around and make it a good soap opera. We definitely need some power couples in this show. And all the storylines are wayyy too similar. Anyway, keep up the awesome work with your column! I love it!" Thanks Alexandra!!!

Until next week friends,

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