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The week of September 20, 2010
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As soap opera fans, we are expected to accept a lot. We often have to suspend reality and accept that characters can age 20 years over night, have evil twins, or return from the dead.

As soap opera fans, we are expected to accept a lot. We often have to suspend reality and accept that characters can age 20 years over night, have evil twins, travel thousands of miles in a commercial break, and of course, return from the "dead." I can accept all of those things, even if I don't like them; they simply come with the territory of watching soap operas. However, last week pushed my tolerance of accepting outlandish events to the limit.

While I was hoping Eli was gone forever, I was pretty sure that I wouldn't be so lucky. Sure enough, Eli turned out to be alive and ready to follow through with his plan. However, his explanation for how he faked his death was ridiculous. We are supposed to accept that Ross just happened to have a dead body lying around to swap with Eli and that Eli had the foresight to know that Blair would find out about his past and shoot him with the gun filled with blanks that he he'd planted. He also knew how to start a fire while falling down so that the body would be unidentifiable, and all of this would happen in a span of a few minutes. Perhaps some things are better left unexplained!

The only part of the story that has held my interest is Greg's role in all of it. Why does Greg fear Eli so much? Eli rarely follows through on his threats, and Greg has the advantage right now, since Eli allegedly has a life-threatening condition. Greg could easily leave him to rot, and I hope does! Eli must have something huge to blackmail Greg with, because otherwise, Greg's fear of Eli is nonsensical. All of this needs to be explained soon, or I will lose what little remaining interest I have in this story.

On the good side, we discovered that Tea Téa is still alive. This news wasn't surprising on its own, but I was surprised (and happy) that this fact was revealed so soon after her "death." I figured that we wouldn't see Tea Téa for at least another month. I am sure that Todd, Dani, Blair, and the rest of Llanview won't know that she's alive for a long time, though.

Tea's Téa's return to Llanview can't happen soon enough. Todd is a lost soul right now, and Dani needs her mother if Ross and Todd are going to wage war over custody of her. In reality, I don't think that someone can award custody of a child to someone in a will, especially when there is still a living biological parent, but I guess that's one of those things we are expected to accept as a soap opera viewer. Anyway, I don't want to see Dani be in the middle of a tug-a-war and be expected to pick which dad she loves more. She has been through enough already, and I don't believe that Ross will win custody of Dani, especially since Tea's Téa's still alive, so this plot twist seems pointless.

I don't want to see Todd and Blair become a couple again as a result of all of this. Todd and Blair stopped being a good couple a long time ago, and I don't want to see them be thrown together because Tea Téa is gone and because Dani needs a mother. Blair and Todd can be friends, but that's all I want to see them be. I can't watch them reunite just to hurt each other again a few months later. It's been done before, and there doesn't need to be a repeat!

When John and Natalie reunited, I hoped their new relationship would be better than the first one. I wasn't a fan the first time around and was happy when they finally broke up. So far, I am not getting my wish. While they are getting along quite well right now, Natalie is keeping a big secret from John, so all of this happiness is built on a lie. What's the point? John is being a lot nicer to Natalie this time around, which is great, but until Natalie tells John that Brody might be the biological father of her baby, John and Natalie aren't worth watching.

At the same time, I was happy to see Brody accept the truth about Jessica's baby, but really, how much of a choice did he have? He can't dump Jessica for possibly carrying Ford's baby when Natalie might be carrying his. Brody and Natalie are making their respective situations worse by choosing to keep their secret, and it's hard to like either character or root for either of their relationships these days!

Langston proved that she is a Cramer woman last week, as she exacted revenge on Ford and got him fired from Llanview University. Sadly, I'm sure this isn't the end of the story and that she will still end up going back to him for real at some point. She can't stay away from him, and even while she declares that she hates him, she hasn't done anything to actually keep him out of her life. As I said, Langston is a true Cramer woman, regardless of genetics. She declares she will stay away but still ends up going back to what is bad for her in the end.

Meanwhile, Dorian attempted to return to her regularly-scheduled life as mayor of Llanview, but it didn't work. I am glad that Kelly encouraged her to stop moping around and to do her job, but Dorian's imagination got the best of her, and she lashed out at Bo and Nora for things that weren't said nor done. Dorian goes through roughly the same kind of breakdown each time she is dumped, and I think it would be a better story to see her move on and prove that being left at the altar didn't get the best of her. I know that's not a typical soap opera story, but Dorian's done the moping/lashing out routine multiple times now. It's time for Dorian to be taken in a different direction.

Speaking of different directions, I like that Clint is becoming a darker character. He channels Asa more with every passing day, and let's face it, Clint has many reasons to be angry and ready for revenge! After Kim left, I was afraid that Clint would disappear and only be seen for special events, so I am glad that he has a story that has a lot of potential. As Clint mentors Matthew, courts Inez to annoy to anno Bo, and tortures Dorian with "David's" MyFace updates, he could become a better villain than Llanview has seen in a long time!

I still don't like that Inez is a frequent topic of discussion between Bo and Nora, however. I don't like that Nora is being written as an insecure wife who is concerned about her husband's assistant. While it's been written to be comical so far, it's beneath Nora's character. Bo and Nora are above clichéd stories like this, and we've hardly seen them since they got married in June. They don't need complications or dramatic events to be interesting, so why don't they have their own story? By the way, when did Nora become such a big fan of baked Alaska?

Gigi and Rex should have their own story too, without Kelly becoming an issue in their new relationship. Gigi and Rex have been slowly working their way back to each other, which is understandable, given all that they have been through. However, it seems like Kelly is being forced into their story to give Kelly a purpose. I don't see romantic potential between Kelly and Rex, regardless of how many times one of them walks in on the other one naked. They make decent friends, but I don't see anything worth pursuing beyond that.

I liked that Rex was supportive and encouraged Gigi to keep going to school last week. While I wonder where Gigi got the idea that counting tips would make her a pro at calculus, I like the idea of her going to school as an adult. It's rare that a character takes initiative to better herself on soap operas, and I hope she keeps up with it. It will be interesting to see if Rex continues to be so supportive of Gigi's efforts, since she will undoubtedly have less time to spend with him!

It looks like we've seen the last of Cristian and Layla as a couple for a while, as they both decided to pursue individual opportunities and postpone their wedding for a year. I think it was a good decision, since they won't end up resenting each other for missing big opportunities, but I doubt they will actually get married. A year is a very long time in soap opera world. It will be interesting to see if Cristian and Layla make it to the altar.

Until next time,

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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