I am still loving the battle between the Chandlers and the Slaters. After being confronted by Tad and unable to bear Adam's guilt (yeah, right), JR came clean with his dad and admitted he staged the kidnapping. Junior, once again, was pretty pathetic, offering half-hearted apologies and trying to equate what he did with Adam's collusion with Zach. Because torturing your father and trying to steal his money is the same as trying to get back the company you built from nothing. David Canary was awesome, going from disbelief to heartbreak to full-on rage in a matter of moments.
As of now, the two Chandler men have called a temporary truce to fight Zach. At least I hope it's temporary - I would like nothing more than to see Adam get his company back (IF he gets it back) and then disown his son permanently. And how lame was it for Junior to offer to sell his shares? You know, the shares he would never have had in the first place if Adam hadn't GIVEN THEM TO HIM. JR is about as qualified to run a major corporation as Babe is to be a top-level cosmetics executive. Maybe those two really [i]are[/i] perfect for each other.
The Chandler truce came in the wake of Zach's latest bombshell - that Josh would be running their company. You have to love Josh waltzing into the Chandler mansion, helping himself to some coffee and calling Adam "Dad," right before he asked Junior for all the Chandler files. Speaking of barging in, how hilarious was it to watch Zach and Kendal tour the manse with designers in tow, with Marian (yes, Marian!) offering her services as Pine Valley's real estate agent extraordinaire. Of course, JR took the opportunity to try to play Kendall, apologizing again for nearly killing her and Spike, but telling her he was not trying to kiss her butt. Yeah, sure. I bet JR would be going out of his way to profess his deep regret if there were nothing in it for him.
As a former fan of their friendship, it's depressing to watch Junior with Kendall. That dynamic was completely ruined. Luckily, their conversation was short - and soon interrupted by a parade of "vultures" staking their claim on the mansion. How hilarious was Opal, threatening to drape the walls in velvet, ship in some gold furniture and turn Adam's living room into Glamorama 2? Or Zach suggesting Myrtle move in to start a new boarding house? (Either of those options would be great, by the way.)
This story is a great example of how a soap doesn't have to focus solely on romances and break-ups. I love Zach and Kendall, but it's great to see then interact with other characters on their own. And I'd much rather see Adam fight and claw his way back to the top than watch him chase Krystal's cleavage. The best part of the whole thing, of course, is watching David Canary and Thorsten Kaye work together. Regardless of how the Chandler Enterprises saga plays out, I hope these two continue to share scenes.
Would You Like Some Cheese With That Whine?
I hope no one with lactose intolerance was watching AMC's special Fourth of July episode, because that was some of the cheesiest stuff I've ever seen. Well, not quite as cheesy as the "Everybody Wants to be a Martin" dream sequence from a few weeks back, but I digress... That said, I did enjoy Amanda yelling encouragement during Annie and Greenlee's catfight ("Pull the hair!") and Kendall's running commentary during the meditation session was very cute. Otherwise, it was just one of those manufactured girl bonding sessions that I find so annoying. Besides, when it comes right down to it, it was only about two women.
Annie and Greenlee spent the week sparring with each other, while Ryan tried to ignore the problem and convince Annie there was nothing to worry about. He also saw fit to push away Kendall's help, not that I saw that as much of a surprise - or tragedy. If I had my way, Kendall would be staying as far away from this Ryan/Annie/Greenlee insanity as possible. Of course, both ladies are doing their best to convince themselves that they are the one Ryan wants. Talk about battling it out for a booby prize. I guess if I had to pick a side, it would be Annie's, just because this new version of Greens has been beyond annoying. She seriously needs to turn down the volume and the whine factor. Her meditation inner monologue was excruciating - "You love meeeee, Ryyyaaaaan!!! Come oooooooon, Ryyyyyaaaaaaannnnnn! WAAAAAAAAAAAH!" (Oh, and Greenlee really shouldn't be co-owner of a cosmetics company if she considers putting someone's hair in pigtails a "makeover.")
Of course, we'll get more sniping in the coming weeks, now that Kendall is forcing Greens and Annie to work together on the "Day to Night" campaign. I love my girl, but she needs to stop trying to play peacemaker in the office. God bless her for making the effort, but it's just not worth it. The unfortunate part is, if Kendall doesn't involve herself, Ryan will be the one calling the shots, making ludicrous decisions like inviting Greens to be part of their family and then deciding he can't ever see her. Wasn't it nice for him to offer to do that to ease Annie's insecurities, when he wasn't willing to do it for former true love Kendall when Greens torpedoed her "sister's" life? It's all just too insane.
Speaking of insane, Krystal and Derek are nauseating. I mean, I guess if I were Derek and I hadn't had sex since the mid-1990s (I can only presume he didn't date while on the backburner), I would go for some one as... um... willing as Krystal Carey. It's a pretty safe bet. It just ticks me off that they finally bring the Frye family out of hiding only to have them talk about Krystal all the time.
Another creeptacular match is Ava and Jonathan, who were bonding over bartending this week. Awww, isn't that adorable? I love watching a young girl traipse around the house in lingerie while her obsessive ex-brother-in-law pants over her. It doesn't help to see Jeff Branson in a vest and barely there mustache. And it will only get worse now that it seems Ava will be stepping in for Lily as the face of Fusion Green. I shudder just thinking about the look in Jonny Boy's eyes when he sees Ava in full Lily regalia. Speaking of which, I get why Ava would want Lily to do her makeup to pull off a convincing match, but why couldn't Ava wash her face herself? It was just weird.
Well, at least Jack and Erica are back together (for now). Of course, they're keeping up the whole new divorce charade to boost Erica's ratings. Some of the moments were cute, but if anyone in Pine Valley believes that act for one second, they're idiots. At least try to take this stuff a little seriously! I mean, Erica's "disguise" for her secret rendezvous with Jack was a giant hat and sunglasses. Way to pull the wool over their eyes, Erica! They'll just think Jack is on a date with one of the other 5-foot-tall, dark-haired, impeccably dressed divas roaming around the yacht club! At least it's more entertaining then the "you say you love me first" nonsense of the past few months. Oh, and can the wardrobe people please dress Jackson is some real clothes? No more linen or powder blue jackets, I beg you!
One Last Word
Since the hiring of Barbara J. Esensten and James Harmon Brown, I've been looking for signs of improvement at AMC. Of late, I've noticed quite a few mentions of history (both recent and distant) that made me a little optimistic. Greenlee mentioned Kendall's ultimatum to Ryan, as well as Kendall's job babysitting Petey Cortlandt, which was an integral part of the Fusion storyline (their office space was leased to Kendall for practically nothing thanks to her connection with Palmer). When Kendall and Zach showed up at the Chandler manse, she mentioned that Palmer was visiting Nina. They're tiny little things - throwaway lines that may not amount to anything - but they definitely caught my attention.
Thanks for reading. See you soon!