Kicking it old school

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Kicking it old school
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The week of March 31, 2008
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Last week, Jack's infection made him think that water was beer, and that Katie was his wife. The water/beer mix-up sort of explains the crazy health care practices at the hospital.

Welcome back, As the World Turns! Oh, how I've missed you. This week's show warmed my heart and felt like the ATWT of years past. It had heartfelt family scenes with people we care about, plenty of romantic angst, and sincere friendships. There were no serial killers, psycho stalkers, or back-from-the dead plots. It was solid, genuine storytelling that entertained. In other words, bravo!

I was positively giddy at all the incredible Tom and Margo scenes and the use of her rape history. And finally, Barbara's cancer storyline was forefront, as she broke the news to her kids. If you didn't need a tissue for those scenes, your heart must be the size of the Grinch, prior to his enlightenment. Even Paul, who I've been constantly criticizing this year for his wishy-washy out-of-character behavior, was enjoyable as a mentor to Parker. And the Snyder clan circled the wagons and pulled together to support Parker in court. The scenes with the Hughes watching television and the Snyders eating dinner may have seemed mundane to some, but to me, they were exactly what has been missing from the show: family focus.

If I didn't know better, I'd think the showrunners at ATWT have actually been reading my Two Scoops column and took my advice from the past year. (Yeah, probably not.) But whatever changed this week that prompted this trend, please, please, please keep it up. We don't need psychos, rapists, stalkers and killers to have a top-notch daytime drama. We simply need good stories for charismatic characters that we love.

Meanwhile:
--Emma couldn't go to her grandson's celebration party because she "had so many chores to do." Um, Emma, you have a village of people living at your house. Make those freeloaders earn their keep!

--Brad and Bonnie need to find a new hobby. Otherwise, they're headed for AA. . If I had knocked back the amount of shots that Brad and Bonnie and Katie did the other night, I'd be in the hospital for alcohol poisoning.

--Jack's infection made him think that water was beer and that Katie was his wife. I can almost understand the Katie/Carly mix up, considering that the historically straight-haired Katie is now sporting Carly's long curls that she's worn the past year. As for the water/beer mix up, I always thought the hospital was putting something in the water. It sort of explains the crazy health care practices there.

--Raise your hand if you knew the plural of cactus is cacti or that tequila came from the agave plant. Thank you, Bonnie, for enlightening us.

--I'm not going to be too picky with this plot point, because I know it was necessary to set up the storyline of Margo shooting Gray, but I couldn't help but chuckle that none of the cops assigned to guard the Hughes house didn't hear the gunshot and come running, after Gray fired his gun. What were the cops doing outside, listening to their iPods?

--I know many of you, including myself, have been critical of the lack of sets this past year. It seems like everyone lives at the Snyder farm. (Sigh.) But, I have to say that I'm really enjoying the outdoor shots lately. It makes the characters and situations seem much more real. And it looks great on screen.

--Speaking of outdoor shots and this new lighting, isn't Carly the palest woman you've ever seen? I don't mean that as an insult. In fact, just the opposite. That woman has the most gorgeous skin I've ever seen. She should give up the design business and market a skincare-makeup line. I think the folks of Oakdale would be falling all over themselves to have her complexion.

--As I mentioned earlier, Barbara broke my heart with her oral cancer storyline this week. Thank you, writers, for educating us about HPV and that it can give women oral cancer. I had no idea, and I'm sure the millions of fans that watch the show didn't either. We tend to associate oral cancer with people who smoke or use smokeless tobacco, not elegant, non-smoking women like Barbara. The social message wasn't preachy or awkward, just a genuine attempt to explain a condition. Kudos!

--As you know by now, Will and Gwen are leaving town, apparently with their new baby to start a new life. I hate to see Will leave right now, considering what his mother is facing. Will has been such a corner of the show for so long, and his relationship with his mother has always been one of my favorite storylines. It will be strange to have the Ryan/Munson clan down another person, especially when Barbara needs her family. As for Gwen, though, she's barely had a scene with Carly in the past year, so I guess the family bonding won't really be missed there.

--I love Emma. When she threatened Paul with her shotgun this week, I couldn't help but chuckle. You go girl. Although, as many times as Paul has died in the course of the last four years, I doubt the threat of her double barrel would faze him much.

--I hate to nitpick poor Parker's storyline, considering I didn't want him to end up in the pokey. But, the fact that the judge simply believed the homeless lady's story about Kit had me scratching my head. It was clearly hearsay, so I was surprised that he dropped all charges. I'm happy but surprised. Maybe now Parker can get back to playing hockey.

--Maybe it's the arrival of spring that has me in such a good mood, but even Sofie didn't annoy me this week. It seems the writers have transitioned her character a little. What do you think of Sofie 2.0? If she gets a backbone, I might actually like her a little.

--Shame on Brad and Katie for almost leaving their passed-out friend Bonnie at the bar. With friends like that, who needs enemies?

--I never thought I'd see the complexity of Jack Snyder's love life be whittled down to a sandwich metaphor. When he was having lunch with Katie and Carly and he wanted mustard and mayo, too, I was howling.

--Did my eyes deceive me or were Tom, Margo and Casey watching Curb Your Enthusiasm? If so, I love it! Nice.

--So Gray was some kind of mastermind, but he couldn't figure out how to detonate a bomb? I wasn't sure if he did that just to torture them, or if the bomb truly malfunctioned. Either way it was horrific. I was screaming right along with Margo and the kids, though, when that thing ticked down.

--This is bugging me and perhaps someone here can explain. How did they know that the second shot killed Sam? In other words, how did they know which shot was first and which one Parker fired? Both shots came from the same gun. Is this a forensics thing? Perhaps I haven't watched enough CSI to understand. School me, forensics people.

--Casey should be woken up at night more often. But only if he continues to be shirtless and wearing those low-rise jeans. The shallow girl in me couldn't help but appreciate his outfit.

--It seems Henry and Vienna have the diner back and are back to a blissful relationship. I'm not so thrilled that Henry will be back at the diner. I don't think it's a good fit for his character, but I'm hoping the writers will surprise me somehow.

--Luke Snyder is working my last nerve. He seems so needy toward Noah, following him around like a puppy dog. I'd like to see Luke be a little more independent.

--I wonder if Ameera was raped in Iraq? She wigged out during Parker's trial when it was mentioned that Carly was almost raped. If possible, I think this will bring she and Noah even closer, further alienating Luke. That's my fearless prediction, and I'm sticking to it.

--If I ever need to hire a lawyer, I want Tom Hughes. His dedication is unbelievable. The man's house and family were almost blown to bits. Then, his family was attacked by a crazy guy with a gun, yet he turned up bright and early to defend a kid for murder in court. Impressive! If anyone needed to take a personal day, it was Tom.

--Thank you writers for telling us that Katie and Brad were going to get their money back that they loaned Jack and Carly to trap Kit. It's usually small storyline details like that that are dropped and make me crazy. Well done.

--I've received an alarming number of e-mails this week of folks saying they're going to stop watching when Martha Byrne vacates her Lily role. That is certainly your prerogative, but I think you're being premature. Yes, it's a real shame that Bryne and the show couldn't work out a deal, but there are plenty of reasons to keep tuning in. I think jumping ship because one character leaves, especially before you've seen her replacement, is premature. At least give the new actress a chance, folks.

--I think Katie has been reading Two Scoops, too. I think she stole one of my lines this week when she told Margo that she knew that her sister was thinking that she just keeps moving from man to man without sorting out her feelings. Katie, you are so right.

--So, it looks like Meg got divorce papers from Craig. So, that storyline is, thankfully, ending. Can I get an Amen?

--The previews for next week have me excited. Mike Kasnoff returns, Brad proposed and Ali dyes her hair black. Huh? Maybe she's going through a "dark phase" after this whole run in with criminals Matt and Gray.

Best Lines of the Week:
(Henry and Vienna make up and are making out in public.)
Bonnie: "Do you think their joy is contagious?"
Brad: "Only in the way that it's making me sick."

Reader Spotlight:
(From Two Scoops Eulah.)
"I am sorry to say that once Lily is gone along with Will and Gwen, so will I be gone!! I hate the new people, but I guess I should have seen the handwriting on the wall when Dusty was killed off, and now Lily is gone. Can Holden be far behind?"

(From Two Scoops Sue.)
"Didn't you love the scene with Kim and Barbara at the Lakeview when Babs told Kim about her cancer? I almost cried because I realized how much I missed those scenes. ATWT used to be about family caring enough about each other to sit down and really talk. That scene was the first in a really long time that reminded me of the great, old days. Please, let's have more!"

(From Two Scoops Diane.)
"Thank you, Jennifer, for calling us on the carpet for being so negative about ATWT. While there are certainly some reasons to complain, there are still some of the finest actors on daytime in the cast. I cried along with Gwen & Barbara last week when Gwen told her about the baby. AND laughed myself silly during the scenes with Henry & Cowboy Jack. Jesse Sofer is awesome, and I can't keep my eyes off the screen when Parker and Sage or on. But he incompetence at Memorial and the OPD is getting so annoying, and WHY can't we have all the family members in the same room at least occasionally? I think the show's just a little off; let's hope it can be righted soon before it's too late. At least we haven't been subjected to talking dolls and demon possession like some of the other shows!"

(From Two Scoops Diane.)
"Maybe things are turning the corner. I had tears in my eyes today when Vienna & Henry exchanged vows and Barbara finally talked to Kim about her cancer. There are signs that Matt might turn out OK (I like him better than nuCasey) and Sophie might actually turn out to be human. Athough I'm constantly baffled at the incompetence at Memorial Hospital. Let's keep our fingers crossed that things are on the way up. Also, I want to be sure to thank you so much for your column. I'm sure you have a life outside ATWT, but I hope you know that your fans really appreciate your efforts. I try not to miss even one of your columns. Thank you."

That's all for now Scoopers! See ya next time.
Jennifer Biller

Jennifer Biller
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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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